I am happy to tell you that where there’s a ta-ta, there’s a way.

Las Vegas has invented drive-up strip clubs.

Little Darlings strip club will begin offering drive-through strip shows for those who want to indulge in some adult entertainment, but do not want to enter the building, as the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention is recommending people keep 6 feet in distance between themselves and others.

“We’re going to offer drive-up window strip shows,” said Ryan Carlson, director of operations for Little Darlings. “Guests can drive up to the front door and we’re going to have dancers separate by the 6-foot separation rule and they can enjoy a totally nude show right from the seat of their car.”

It’s be $100 for a 10 minute show, plus tip.

They are also considering nakkid rasselin’ covered in gallons of hand sanitizer but I don’t want to even think about that.

Thanks to Kary for the heads up.

That right there is some powerful butt kissing.

There’s a reason that you don’t see Texas Senator John Cornyn making a lot of speeches and television appearances.  Like Ted Cruz, he’s a buffoon.  Unlike Ted Cruz, he knows it.

Would you like to see an example from yesterday?  Defending his leader Donald Trump, Cornyn explained why Republicans are calling Coronavirus the “Chinese virus.”

“China is to blame,” Sen. John Cornyn, R-Texas, said Wednesday of the virus, which was first identified in Wuhan, China. “Because the culture where people eat bats and snakes and dogs and things like that.”

Damn, dude. You’re from Texas.  You eat crawfish, which are just big roaches that live underwater. You eat crabs and oysters and you eat oysters raw. You eat gator and bull testicles. You eat Bambi’s mom and say it’s yummy.  And if you try to convince us that you’ve never eaten rattlesnake, then you will lose four counties in west Texas.  You’re a Texan and that means you’ll put pretty near any goddam thing in your mouth, chew it up, swallow it and then cheerfully wait a day or two before you leave it in the outhouse.

Don’t get prissy, John.  If you’ve ever eaten chili that you didn’t make yourself, you have no idea what you’ve eaten.

And, the icing on the cake is a charming article at The Root.  It contends that Cornyn’s statement is only the third most racist thing Republicans said yesterday.  Be sure to read to the bottom – you’ll snort giggle.

Okay, okay, enough with the rumors that Trump is going to suspend the elections and stay in office.  It doesn’t work that way.

First of all, states run elections, even the federal ones.  Some rightwing states could opt out but that doesn’t matter – it’s the number of votes, not the number of people who voted.

And secondly, he would not remain President. Here’s how it was explained to me:

His term ends January 20th and so does Pence, thank sweet Jesus.

All members of congress also lose their office, so there goes Nancy Pelosi.

Next comes senate. Fourth in line is the president pro tempore of the Senate, who is the senior-most member of the majority party. Currently that is Chuck Grassley.

But wait! 23 Republicans are up for election in 2020, and only 12 Dems are. If there is no election, all of their terms expire.

If 23 GOP senators lose their seats and only 12 Dems, that means a Democratic majority, so Patrick Leahy becomes the senior-most member of the majority party, and fourth in line.

I could live with that.

Thanks to everybody for the info.

The IRS is giving you a 90 day extension if you have to pay taxes.

I don’t trust the sumbitches in charge.  Mnuchin seems real good at taking other peoples’ money.

The deadline extension, announced Tuesday, is an effort to immediately free up household money. The COVID-19 pandemic is forcing people inside to “socially distance” themselves to slow the spread, and that’s cutting down cash flow for businesses and workers.

See, I’m thinking they’re hoping that instead of saving that money for 90 days, you’ll use it to fix up your house so come mid-July they’ll just come take your house when you ain’t got the money.  That’s how much I don’t trust these guys.

And then on the upside of the downside …

The stock market’s latest dip Wednesday did more than wipe out billions of dollars in investor equity. It also obliterated President Donald Trump’s favorite measure of his economic success.

But he still gives himself a ten!

So what if Trump really is the anti-Christ?

We got plagues and now earthquakes.

A 5.7 magnitude earthquake shook Utah’s Salt Lake City area Wednesday morning, cutting power to tens of thousands and suspending work at the state’s public health lab amid the coronavirus pandemic, officials said.

Heads up if you see locust or some guys on white horses.