My friend Vickie is on the receiving end of some pretty cool Republican emails, which thankfully she forwards to me for my pure entertainment.

This one is about Pete, the astute vehicle service manager with inside knowledge, or a secret plan he apparently figured out on his own.

This latest one prove they finally caught on to our secret plan which we hatched at the secret meetings at The Secret Club and National Secret Day …

Here’s a very scary thought…

I had to take my vehicle to the mechanic the other day for service. The Service Manager Pete, gave me a ride home and on the way he told me his theory about the upcoming election and the next four years of U.S. government.

At first I thought it a bit far-fetched, but as I listened to him it began to make sense, scary sense…

“I believe that Hillary Clinton will win the election in November,” Pete began. “Then, sometime between November and January, Hillary will be indicted. The IRS is now investigating the Clinton Foundation and the whole e-mail thing isn’t over yet.”

“Once under indictment she won’t be able to assume the Office of the President in January. Tim Kaine, who will not actually be the Vice President because neither he nor Hillary have been inaugurated, cannot assume the Presidency.”

“The Speaker of the House can’t move up to it because there is already a sitting President and Vice President.

So President Obama, in an Executive Order citing “emergency situation,” gives himself another four years in office is the only way possible.”

Pete believes Obama has been planning this for a while now, knowing he has enough on Hillary to indict her. Had the Attorney General indicted her based on evidence from the FBI this plan wouldn’t have worked because the DNC would have quickly come up with another candidate.

If you think about it, it’s not that outrageous. Many people on the left, including the President, want Obama to stay another four years. The law prohibits him from being re-elected so the only ways he can do it is by declaring martial law and suspending the election (which would be a very negative thing for the country) or to declare himself still President because the elected candidate cannot assume her duties.

The latter makes more sense and is actually more feasible. And since it’s never been done before, it would set a precedent that would be difficult to challenge.

Of course, if Trump wins the election none of this is going to happen. But what if Pete is correct? Four more years of Obama and a mostly useless Republican House and Senate would give Obama the time he needs to continue destroying and changing the country to fit his stated goals.

I thanked Pete for the ride home – and for messing up my day. Now I’ve got more things to worry about!

Okay, who told?  I wanna know who told.

Thanks to Vickie for the heads up.

Okay, so here’s a wall-eyed snot nosed hissy fit:

Aetna health insurance company wants to merge with Humana insurance company and have a monopoly over healthcare in America.

Last month the  Justice Department blocked it after an antitrust review, saying the two deals would lead to higher prices.

Aetna says it is not making enough money and wants to merge with Humana to make more money.

Get this.  In April of 2015 —

Aetna beat earnings estimates and recorded $777.5 million of profit in the first quarter of this year, prompting the Hartford, Conn.-based health insurer to raise profit predictions for the rest of the year.

Aetna said it was able to build higher profits into its commercial and Medicare and Medicaid health plans.

And then in April of this year, they were making plenty of profit by their own admission.

Aetna Inc. became the latest health insurer to report losses on 2015 Affordable Care Act business, a dark spot as the company unveiled sharply higher profit for the fourth quarter.

The company said its overall profit leapt 38% in the final quarter of the year, as a key measure of spending on medical costs fell. The strong quarterly results were fueled largely by its government business, which includes Medicare and Medicaid.

So, when the Justice Department said they couldn’t have a monopoly on health insurance, they did what any insanely greedy corporation with “sharply” increasing overall profits:

They damn threatened to pull damn out of the damn Affordable Healthcare coverage, dammit.

They want to leave one million people uninsured because $777 million in profit for three months is not enough money for them.

What the hell?

Here’s a company controlling healthcare in America and they don’t have a damn thing to do with healthcare.  Aetna does not own a stethoscope or an MRI machine.  They do not provide healthcare.  They sit in an office and let someone with an English degree decide if they are going to pay for something a medical doctor says you need.

Screw ‘um.  The one million people they cover in the Affordable Care Act should start reporting to Aetna offices with a hacking cough and open sores.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

Okay, here’s the reason why I think the leader of the Republican Party is acting so damn crazy.  He’s trying to keep you from noticing that Mike Pence is crazier than he is.  And that is scary because Trump’s stint in the White House probably won’t be picked up for a second year.

Pence is a creationist and has suggested that creationism be taught in public schools.  Pence claims …

Charles Darwin never thought of evolution as anything other than a theory. He hoped that some day it would be proven by the fossil record but did not live to see that, nor have we.

But no one is pointing out that the textbooks will need to be changed because the old theory of evolution taught for 77 years in the classrooms of America as fact is suddenly replaced by a new theory, or I hasten to add, I am sure we will be told a new fact.

I have a theory, too.  My theory is that creationists are people who did not do well at science in school and want the answer to every question on the science test to be, “You know, God.”

Thanks to Bill for the heads up.

Thanks to Don A. for the heads up.

Well, this explains a lot.

A new poll suggests there is at least one fellow Republican who could unseat U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz in 2018: Rick Perry.

The former Texas governor would beat Cruz by 9 percentage points, according to the forthcoming survey from the Democratic-leaning firm Public Policy Polling. Set to be released later today, the poll found Perry would get 46 percent of the vote and Cruz 37 percent, with 18 percent saying they are not sure whom they would support.

Clash of the Uncouth Titans.

Can you even imagine the number of prayer meetings and tent revivals boxing matches those two could generate?  Not even to mention gun fights.

There is some good news from the same poll, though.

Another standout finding from the poll is that despite Texas’ proud pro-gun tradition, voters strongly support some new regulations on the purchase of firearms. Eighty-nine percent say every person who wants to buy a gun should undergo a criminal background check, while 83 percent back legislation that prohibit people on the terrorist watch list from purchasing a firearm.

Hell, 48% of Texans said they would support a nationwide ban on assault weapons.  Two years ago, that number was 4% and a couple of those people were lying.

Y’all, I heard the oddest thing this morning.  I am certain it’s not true.  It just cannot be true.

First I heard that Donald Trump is going to take Chris Christy with him to his security briefing.  That just can’t be true.  That has to be one of those satire sites, right?  Goodness gracious, what does a failed governor know or even need to know international affairs?  What? Is he gonna scream at anyone who challenges the United States? Close their bridge? Hell, that might mean Secretary of State Chris Christy.  So see, that couldn’t be right.

But, I’m afraid to look.

And then, holy cow, I heard that Trump had hired the entire wacked-out staff of Brietbart to take over his campaign. What? Louie Gohmert wasn’t available? Brietbart is Louie Gohmert with too much caffeine.  Breitbart people couldn’t run an apple peeler or a shower curtain but they are running a presidential campaign? Next, Trump will think they can run country.

See, that’s why I can’t look. I just can’t.