Damn, They Caught Us!

August 18, 2016 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

My friend Vickie is on the receiving end of some pretty cool Republican emails, which thankfully she forwards to me for my pure entertainment.

This one is about Pete, the astute vehicle service manager with inside knowledge, or a secret plan he apparently figured out on his own.

This latest one prove they finally caught on to our secret plan which we hatched at the secret meetings at The Secret Club and National Secret Day …

Here’s a very scary thought…

I had to take my vehicle to the mechanic the other day for service. The Service Manager Pete, gave me a ride home and on the way he told me his theory about the upcoming election and the next four years of U.S. government.

At first I thought it a bit far-fetched, but as I listened to him it began to make sense, scary sense…

“I believe that Hillary Clinton will win the election in November,” Pete began. “Then, sometime between November and January, Hillary will be indicted. The IRS is now investigating the Clinton Foundation and the whole e-mail thing isn’t over yet.”

“Once under indictment she won’t be able to assume the Office of the President in January. Tim Kaine, who will not actually be the Vice President because neither he nor Hillary have been inaugurated, cannot assume the Presidency.”

“The Speaker of the House can’t move up to it because there is already a sitting President and Vice President.

So President Obama, in an Executive Order citing “emergency situation,” gives himself another four years in office is the only way possible.”

Pete believes Obama has been planning this for a while now, knowing he has enough on Hillary to indict her. Had the Attorney General indicted her based on evidence from the FBI this plan wouldn’t have worked because the DNC would have quickly come up with another candidate.

If you think about it, it’s not that outrageous. Many people on the left, including the President, want Obama to stay another four years. The law prohibits him from being re-elected so the only ways he can do it is by declaring martial law and suspending the election (which would be a very negative thing for the country) or to declare himself still President because the elected candidate cannot assume her duties.

The latter makes more sense and is actually more feasible. And since it’s never been done before, it would set a precedent that would be difficult to challenge.

Of course, if Trump wins the election none of this is going to happen. But what if Pete is correct? Four more years of Obama and a mostly useless Republican House and Senate would give Obama the time he needs to continue destroying and changing the country to fit his stated goals.

I thanked Pete for the ride home – and for messing up my day. Now I’ve got more things to worry about!

Okay, who told?  I wanna know who told.

Thanks to Vickie for the heads up.

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0 Comments to “Damn, They Caught Us!”


  1. BWAHAHAHAHA Best laugh I’ve had all week.

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  2. Annabelle Lee says:

    “Of course, if Trump wins the election none of this is going to happen.”

    Right, because he won’t be indicted for, say, fraud any time soon, no sirree, Bob.

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  3. 1smartcanerican says:

    Thanks, I really really needed a good belly laugh today and you came through with flying colors!

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  4. Oh good!
    I was hoping we were gonna reopen the basement internment camps under every Walmart – – and the tunnels that connect them.

    Otherwise, it would be such a waste of all that secret nighttime digging, don’t you think?

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  5. Pete is a typical Repug. He isn’t capable of logical thinking and somebody else of his ilk probably forwarded this erudite scenario and it’s now making the rounds of the moronic.
    Stick to fixing cars, Pete, cause politics ain’t your forte.

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  6. Well THAT explains it!!!

    The reason The Nightly Show is being cancelled is because so is “The Unblackening” (of the White House)!!!

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  7. Spread this around. It could be the best way to keep the snacilbuperS from pushing for a Clinton indictment. Actually I don’t know whether Clinton or Obama pushes their collective blood pressure higher, but they’d roll on the floor foaming at the mouth and biting the carpet if they think both of them have put one over on the Greedy Oily People.

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  8. Sweet Mother of God.. Now my head is ringing. And I need a drink. Can he write that down and send it to Trumps main man, so he can put it in his blog. Or is that where he got the Idea. In the first place.
    With 83 day’s to go I have no where near enough JD to make it to NOV. HAY HONEY, buy more pop-corn, beer, and JD lots and lots of JD

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  9. Arguing facts not in evidence. Hey stupid, an indictment is not a conviction and would not prevent her from taking office.

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  10. WA Skeptic says:

    Logic is clearly not a subject taught in this fool’s paradise.

    Just trying to make sense of that stupidity made my brain hurt.

    I think I’ll just go sit under a tree with some iced tea and read a good book.

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  11. @Paul,

    I am not even sure a conviction would preclude a person from becoming President of the United States. Nothing in the Constitution mentioning it. Now, once in office, a President can be removed with a “conviction” by the Senate on impeachment charges.

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  12. Opinionated Hussy says:

    Too bad this won’t happen….I rather like the idea!

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  13. Why don’t we just ask the Prez?

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  14. Pretzelogic in Philly, PA says:

    >> So President Obama, in an Executive Order citing
    >> “emergency situation,” gives himself another four years in
    >> office is the only way possible.”

    Yeah. It’s a real shame there’s no other way possible even in this ridiculous hypothetical, like, say, issuing a Presidential Pardon (just for the fun of seeing the wingnuts’ heads REALLY explode).

    I’d like to laugh, but it’s sad, really. The stupid, it hurts.

    “It was later than I thought when I first believed you
    But now I cannot share your laughter, ship of fools…”
    – Robert Hunter, Ship of Fools

    Keep America Great Again!
    Clinton/Kaine 2016

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  15. JAKvirginia says:

    “It could happen!” — Judy Tenuta

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  16. Hey! This makes more sense than chemtrails!!!

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  17. Words. None. Micr out.

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  18. two crows says:

    As much as I’d love to point and snicker, I really can’t.

    During the fall of 2008, I lived in terror that the Cheney/Bush presidency would use the crises that were happening then to declare martial law and suspend the coming election.

    The fact that, given our recent history, I had more reason for my fears than Pete has now is neither here nor there. I can still sympathize with him.

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  19. RepubAnon says:

    Just because Hillary was indicted wouldn’t mean that she couldn’t be sworn in as President. Even if she couldn’t be sworn in for some reason, we’d probably end up with President Biden rather than a third term of President Obama.

    If the Republicans retain control of the House, they’d have pre-written Articles of Impeachment for Hillary ready to be passed in their first session. Hillary would still be President unless the Senate convicted her – highly unlikely unless there really was something going on other than a Democrat (with the last name of Clinton, no less!) daring to win a Presidential election.

    I expect the House Republicans will replace their endless repeal Obamacare bills with equally futile Impeach Hillary Articles of Impeachment. Hey, everyone’s got to have a hobby…

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  20. Sanborne Addison says:

    It doesn’t work that way. Under the current law, if a President-Elect dies before the inauguration, the Vice President-Elect is sworn in as President. A President-Elect who is merely indicted, however, is sworn in the same as any other, and if afterwards convicted, can be removed from office and succeeded by the Vice President, as Nixon was succeeded by Ford.

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  21. Just in case you eating far too much plain boring popcorn while watching the Goshdarndest Offkilter Pandemonium show, something new arrives! The Trader Joe flyer this week announced “Bombay popcorn” – some sort of Indian street food seasoning.

    OK, so you were begging for an end to the popcorn-inducing craziness. Sometimes the answers to prayers are not in the form you expect.

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  22. Lunargent says:

    Wow, I think if Obama is ingenious enough to pull this off, he deserves a 3rd term!

    I just can’t believe the insides of these people’s heads. It’s like the House of Horrors at an amusement park, with Frankenstein Obama and Dracula Hillary. Except they believe it all.

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  23. Oh, what dreams may come after sniffing unicorn dust!

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  24. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    ROFL How Pete flatters himself and the rest of the snacilbupeR. 8 years. If they think 8 years of being President with these numb nuts on the loose isn’t enough…

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  25. There are at least 3 True Believers in my apartment building.

    Obama a secret Muslim? Check.
    Obama born in Kenya? Check.
    Obama an agent of ISIS? Check.
    U.N. New World Order? Check.
    Agenda 21? Check.

    so, of course . . .

    Obama/Hillary secret plan for his 3rd term? CHECK!!!

    (Maybe I should tell them about this terrible, nefarious plot, just to mess with them? Heh, heh, heh.)

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  26. Marge Wood says:

    I kinda think Obama was looking forward to some peace and quiet.

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  27. are you sure it wasn’t “Pete, the insightful cabbie”? ok, maybe his evil twin brother, “Skippy” Pete the Service Manager.

    I really, really, really want to know what drugs these people are on, and where I can get some. Beer, JD and popcorn are just not going to be sufficient.

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  28. A “bit far-fetched?” Republican Person, what on earth do you find truly far-fetched? Your candidate is Donald Trump!

    And Sweetie, if this Obama plot is the worst thing you can find to worry about then you’re in clover.

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  29. The only person who is going to beat Obama to the exit door on Jan 20 is Michelle.

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  30. Ellen Childress says:

    If you look at Breitbart and other super conservative, anti-Obama publications, websites, etc., you will find this theory expressed in a similar way on each one. Trump’s supporters are being fed this as a daily dish of propaganda.

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  31. JAKvirginia says:

    The only people who spend their days constructing conspiracy theories are people conducting conspiracies. They love them because they’re DOING them. If you listen to someone long enough they will tell you who they are. This guy just did.

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  32. Linda Phipps says:

    My good friend, Emilie, reposted this from her friend, Chip, a rabid conservative. In his opinion, it was funny, but I still emailed him “perhaps you should allow your car service manager to stick to cars”.

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  33. Aw, shucks! My friends and I used to think of something similar when Shrublet was in the Oval Office only at the time it involved Nancy Pelosi becoming President!

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  34. l'angelomisterioso says:

    @maggie-#33- I believe your definition of “thinking” closely resemble that of the snacilbupeRs, which, in turn closely resembles William James definition of the activity: A lot of people think tey are thinking when what they are doing is merely rearranging theit prejudices.Juanita Jean-herownself- is the only person that can make he half-heartedly believe in the concept of one human channeling another. I believe Juanita, at times, channels the spirit of the late, great Molly I.

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  35. l'angelomisterioso says:

    @maggie-#33- I believe your definition of “thinking” closely resemble that of the snacilbupeRs, which, in turn closely resembles William James definition of the activity: A lot of people think they are thinking when what they are doing is merely rearranging their prejudices.Juanita Jean-herownself- is the only person that can make he half-heartedly believe in the concept of one human channeling another. I believe Juanita, at times, channels the spirit of the late, great Molly I.One of the things this board needs, badly is an edit function. I can get sort of fat-fingered and need some way to look as if I can really spell.

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  36. JAKvirginia says:

    l’angelomisterioso: Happens to me all the time. No need to correct and repost. Just follow up with a “typo alert”. We’ll get it.

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  38. Lunargent says:

    Spam cleanup in Aisle 4….

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