Okay, so I want to talk about Elizabeth Warren.  I love her. She has led an amazing life and fought hard for economic justice.

Yesterday she was told to sit down and shut up.

And today Lindsey Graham said the silencing of Warren was “long overdue.”  And the reason it’s overdue?  According to Graham, “The bottom line is, it was long overdue with her. I mean, she is clearly running for the nomination in 2020.”

Holy Damn Crap in a Pile of Bat Guano with the Poop of a Thousand Seagulls on Top.

But Marco Rubio gets to talk? John McCain gets to talk? Rand Paul gets to talk? Ted Cruz gets to talk?

Oh yeah, because in a pinch they can talk through their winkies.

I strongly oppose physical violence but if Mitch McConnell every walks by me, I’m gonna accidentally stick my foot out. And if I spill my sweet tea on Lindsey Graham’s head and holler, “Sir, you are no damn good,” I’m saying right here that I didn’t mean to.

Most of you know that I write to make money, too.  One of the things I write is for OutSmart Magazine, the premier LGBTQ magazine in Houston.

OutSmart allows comments on their website and there’s one dude totally obsessed with me and not in the good way.  I give him a bad case of word indigestion.  Since we don’t allow trolls here at the beauty salon, those of you who enjoy a good debate might want to wander over and pick on Mike.  He’s looking for a fight and seems really disappointed that I won’t do it.

Enjoy! if you’re into that sort of thing.

Read this from Trump’s meeting this morning where he defended his executive order on the ban.

“I was a good student. I understand things. I comprehend very well, OK? Better than, I think, almost anybody. “

Now clean the spit and snot off your computer screen.

Do you know even one smart person who has to tell people they are smart?  Even one?

This information is going to come to a whale of a shock to Stephen Hawking, Neil deGrasse Tyson, Scott Aronson, Noam Chomsky, and your average high school graduate.

Hint: being crazy does not add IQ points.

Thanks to Nancy for the heads up and John for the graphic.

Carly Fiorina has decided to spend her heavily tarnished golden years traveling around the country running for office.

Former Republican presidential candidate Carly Fiorina on Monday told a local Virginia radio show that she’s considering running for the U.S. Senate seat in Virginia in 2018.

Yeah, she thinks she’s going to run against Tim Kaine.

Rumor has it that Barbara Boxer is laughing her butt off.

If this doesn’t work out for Caryl, maybe she could start going to states alphabetically.  You know, go to Alabama and learn to eat cornbread.  Next to Alaska and learn to field dress a moose. Then to Arizona and run against McCain. Then to Arkansas to learn … well, nothing. Skip California – been there, done that. Smoke some weed in Colorado. Hey, you get the idea.

Asset forfeiture is a damn mess in Texas.  Law enforcement can seize the property of those arrested for a crime and have not been found guilty.  That means that they can take your stuff without due process.

Law enforcement says it really, really helps them with convicting drug dealers and terrorists.

Yeah, but … it would also help them convict me if I was arrested with trumped up (see what I did there?) charges. If they took all my assets, I couldn’t hire a lawyer or an investigator, eat actual food before trial, or pay the electricity bill.

The sheriff of Rockwall County, Texas (think suburb of Dallas) went to the White House and met with Trump.  Trump loves asset forfeiture and, coincidently, so does the sheriff.

Trump announced to the public at this meeting that he would like to know the name of the state senator supporting reforming asset forfeiture …

 “President Donald Trump invited the sheriff of a small Texas County to ‘destroy’ the career of a state senator who sought to ban a controversial law enforcement practice by naming the lawmaker during a White House meeting.”

The issue is being debated in the Texas State Senate. Republican State Senator Konni Burton and Democratic State Senator Juan “Chuy” Hinojosa are the two people leading this fight in the Texas Senate.

Being that Konni represents a district near the sheriff’s county, and she is the Republican fighting for due process, it’s most likely that Konni is the one who Trump wants to destroy. Of course, Konni is a woman so destroying her puts another notch in Trump’s belt.

Sumbitch.

Look, I am no Konni Burton cheerleader. She’s anti-choice and kisses up to Greg Abbott, but for Trump to use the White House to “destroy” a damn state senator he doesn’t even know, is … yeah, crazy. It’s crazy.

I don’t think Trump meant Democratic State Senator Chuy Hinojosa.  Chu is a damn American hero and Trump couldn’t touch him with a fifty foot pole. In fact, Chuy might use “Trump wants to destroy me” on his campaign literature.

Thanks to Kyle for the heads up.

This is not about politics.  It is about snooty.  Coffee snooty.

I get alerts from something called Woot! It’s not as good as it was a couple of years ago because it was really good so they sold it to someone else for a boatload of money and someone else ruined it.  Still, I occasionally get a good deal there on weird stuff.

And speaking of weird ….

This morning their main deal was this jewel.

It is a coffeemaker that posts Instagrams of itself, Facebook chats with other coffeemakers in the neighborhood, tweets comebacks to Donald Trump, and makes your day better because your coffee was brewed at 103 degrees instead of the subpar 104.  It also knows how high you are. Well, they call it your altitude but we all know what they mean, right?

And a bargain at about $160.