Well, let’s see.  Our former Governor and our current attorney general are under incitement for felonies.

But Governor Greg Abbott set to fixing that.

In his first State of the State address to the Texas Legislature in early 2015, newly elected Gov. Greg Abbottchallenged lawmakers to dedicate their unfolding 140-day session to ethics reform, asserting that “the most important commodity that we have as elected officials is the bond that we share with our constituents.”

Action talks and talk talks, too, only down a darkened alley way under a crescent moon to meet with hookers.

And that’s what happened in Texas. The Republican dominated Legislature got zero done on ethics reform.  In fact, they went the opposite way, giving state officials accused of crimes more choice of where they want to be prosecuted.

And we got rewarded for that!

So perhaps it’s no surprise that the state earned a grade of D- in the latest State Integrity Investigation, a national assessment of state government accountability and transparency by the Center for Public Integrity and Global Integrity.

We went from a 27th ranking and a D+ two years ago to 38th with a D- this year and it ain’t improving none at all with our agriculture commissioner and Baby Bush as our land commissioner hiring all their friends and relatives at triple digit salaries.  Hell, Baby Bush only shows up at work half the time. We can’t decide if that’s good news or bad news.

Oh hell, Texas. Straighten up and fly right. Or left. Left would be good.

Okay, so two new scam Super-Pacs have opened in Texas.  Reasons I know it’s a scam:

1. It’s headquarters is a post office box in a strip mall.
2. There is no Craig Cunningham registered to vote in Mesquite, Texas (where the post office box is) or Dallas, Texas (where the bank is).  There is a Craig Cunningham in nearby Grand Prairie but he’s never voted.
3. They are named Blue Lives Matter and White Lives Matter

Yeah, that’s pretty much a hint.

What? So Red Lives Don’t matter?

We’ll watch how many damn fools give this guy money for his snake oil.

Click here for Blue Lives Matter.  Click here for White Lives Matter.

Thanks to Alfredo over at the Dairy Queen for the heads up.

The City of Grand Junction, Colorado, and it’s Mayor, Reford Theobald, spent $64,000 of taxpayer money in 2001 to erect a “Cornerstone of Law and Liberty” plaza in front of city hall so they could display a monument of the Ten Commandments.

Reford Theobald led the fight to keep the Ten Commandments on city property.

So, guess who got caught breaking one of the Big Ten?

Yep.

Reford Theobold, 61, was ticketed at about noon on Friday on suspicion of theft by shoplifting after an employee of Cabela’s observed Theobold take several “Big Hunk” candy bars, hide them in a file folder and walk past registers without paying, an officer wrote in the summons.

The police say that “he was embarrassed and that he’d acted “stupid.”

No. Not stupid. It’s not a sin to be stupid.

I wonder how many other commandments he broke that day?  It’s gonna be a heyday for unsolved murders and disrespecting parents.

Thanks to Brian for the heads up. 

Okay, so here’s the deal.  A bunch of Super DeLux Brand Christians are all martyred-out over Starbuck’s holiday cups.

In the past, Starbucks has always had a holiday cup. It generally had holly, snowflakes, a winter scene, or a generic ornament.

Just for pure meanness, the folks at Starbucks went minimalist this year with a plain red cup.  No snowflakes. No holly. No kidding.

Apparently, Jesus approved of the cup design in years past, but now he doesn’t. In fact, he’s telling his posse to tell the Starbuck’s people that their name is Merry Christmas, forcing those overpaid baristas to write Merry Christmas on the cups so that they meet Jesus Standards of Control. Jesus is very passive aggressive.

I, myself am wondering why snowflakes signify Jesus. I am also wondering why Jesus gets pissed off at anything that doesn’t make him the center of attention. But mostly, I am wondering why Super DeLux Brand Christians want to reduce Jesus to cardboard coffee cups.

With all the Merry Christmas people taking to Twitter to express their outrage over Starbucks punishing them for their love of Jesus, one person found a handle on truth and decided to wave it around.

Amen.

Thanks to Bubba for the heads up.

Poor Ben Carson.  All that eduction and he never learned to shuddup.

The latest is that he got on Facebook to answer claims that he’s inexperienced.

Well, that’s kinda really absolutely, truly, joyfully, and provably not true.

At least 28 of the 58 signers had indeed held elective office.

So, never one to admit a mistake, Mental Ben edited his Facebook entry to say that none had ever held FEDERAL elective office.

True. None had ever been to the moon or could skateboard worth crap. And, indeed, none were brain surgeons.

Thanks to Bubba for the heads up.

Okay, at least 15 of you have emailed me this morning to make sure I saw this.

Thank you.  I have seen it.  I now have scrambled eggs up my nose. And by thank you, I mean don’t do that again.

I suspect that’s not a photograph, but it is proudly displayed in Ben Carson’s home. I want you to notice how much better looking Ben Carson is than Jesus. I mean, Jesus looks a tad creepy, like maybe one of those faces in a police department photo array, but Ben looks like a People Magazine cover.

But that ain’t all. No, siree.

I imagine that Solomon didn’t call it the book of Proverbs, but a know for damn certain that he didn’t call it “poverbs.”

A lot of professional people have a vanity wall at their office to impress their clients. This guy has a vanity mansion to impress himself.

And we thought Donald Trump had an ego?

Thanks to everyone for the heads up.