Which Would Kinda Explain His Outfit

March 01, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Iowa Republican State Senator Mark Chelgren got himself semi-famous by wanting to put caps on the number of Democrats that state universities can hire as professors.

Chelgren thinks we have way too many Democrats teaching our college students.  You would suspect he knows that from personal experience because he claims to have a business degree from Forbco Management school.

But, it ain’t that simple. It never is with Republicans.

But State Sen. Mark Chelgren’s alleged alma mater is actually a company that operated a Sizzler steak house franchise in southern California and he doesn’t have a “degree,” Ed Failor, a spokesman for the Iowa State Republicans, told NBC News.

“This was a management course he took when he worked for Sizzler, kind of like Hamburger University at McDonald’s,” Failor said. “He got a certificate.”

Well hell, I have a certificate from Miss Betty Lou’s College of Baton Twirling but that don’t mean I can even twirl a damn baton, much less comment on the state of the American University system.  Truth be known, I spent the money my Momma gave me for baton lessons over at the Woolworth’s on makeup and eye shadow.  Then I bribed Miss Betty Lou, who was kinda a souse, with a six-pack of Pearl Beer, which was the official beer of high school parking lot make-out session, and she gave me a certificate.  Momma never knew, except for the fact that I konked myself on the head whenever I tried to twirl that thing.

And, oh no, he didn’t stop there.  He kept lying.

“I don’t know if they are still in business or not,” Chelgren said. “The school was created by Forbco Management, and I got a degree in hotel restaurant management.”

When Chelgren did not respond to several requests to provide a copy of a diploma or some other proof that he attended Forbco Management school, NBC News reached out to the Iowa State Senate Majority Leader’s office.

He now claims to have attended the University of California at Riverside for three years.

University spokesman John Warren confirmed that Chelgren attended the school in 1992 and 1993 “with a major in physics.”

Yeah, no wonder he didn’t get a degree.  His math skills are weak.

You cannot take your eyes off these people, y’all.

 

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0 Comments to “Which Would Kinda Explain His Outfit”


  1. Senator Chilgren is a political weinie with a genuine certificate in hamburger management…omg!

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  2. JAKvirginia says:

    Forbco Management school? Sheesh…

    What is it with these people? Are they that clueless? I want to grab each one by their, um, ear and drag them to the nearest Google storage facility. These things are multiple football field size buildings full of data storage units. I would explain to them that every day Google sweeps the internet and stores all of that stuff for posterity. YOU WILL BE FOUND OUT! Damn it all to hell these people are SO dumb. I can’t build a website but I know how the stuff works. Why, why, why can’t they get with the program? Aaaaaaarrrrrgggghhh!!!!!!!

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  3. JAKvirginia says:

    Oh! Yeah. That outfit. Stripes and plaids. Apparently can’t Google — stylish>clothes>men — either.

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  4. @JAK
    Ack!

    That shirt and that coat. Together. At the same time. On the same back. Tell ya all ya need to know about the front of the back.

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  5. BTW, if you read the original article, the UC spokesman confirms that he attended for 1 year. Probably because he started in the Fall ’92 quarter and ended in June 93. That is one year of coursework.

    Also, first year undergraduates in the UC system are loaded with pre-determined courses to lay basic educational ground work. His website indicates that he took courses in “astro-physics, geophysics, and mathematics.” First year undergraduates might be introduced to the terms ‘astrophysics and geophysics’ but are generally studying basic math. One wonders if basic mathematics might have eluded him.

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  6. OldMayfy says:

    You know what–Dudes and Dudetts? We have got to pace ourselves. These latter-day Republicans are handing us more tragic/comedy material every day than we can process.

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  7. Another con artist just like the one in the White House. Specifically the one sworn in on inauguration day. Yeah. I know. I had to specify. There are now so many con artists at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue that it could qualify as a zoo!

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  8. Ah, the hazards of not continuing his post graduate studies at the Dairy Queen Institute of Technology.

    At DQ-IT he’d have been taught how to handle situations like this using the same technique for making vanilla-chocolate soft-serve twist cones, to get the right amount of spin necessary for a given situation, or size of cone. He would also learn you can’t just cover up too much twist or spin, with a crunchy chocolate coating, because then you’re a dip. Cone.

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  9. e platypus onion says:

    This bill of his is not the first time I have seen this attempt to limit the amount of liberal professors, so he did not encounter this at school. I fully suspect it is an ALEC conglomeration and it will be seen in more red states. Bet on it.

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  10. JAKvirginia says:

    Yes, epo. ALEC again. I think they come up with this crap to get rube-publicans to pass what will get shot down in the courts. And how does one quantify what is “liberal”. This all seems to be make-work for lawyers.

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  11. JAKvirginia says:

    Rick! Thank you. That made me giggle.

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  12. What he’s really upset about is that colleges have too many smart people.

    And yes, I expect ALEC to be using more of these puppets to push their contempt for anything that doesn’t make them money. Expect them to try to ban the “liberal arts.”

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  13. Oh boy this one is a doozie. First met him at a Quiznos in Ottumwa, Ia. He was telling his buddies that they were in for a real surprise and to stay tuned for an announcement. Come to find out it was that he was running for the Iowa State Senate.
    Now get this, he was so full of his ownself that he said the only reason he didn’t run for United States Senator is that his little woman would have trouble adjusting to life in D.C.

    I hear from many people, as Trump would say, that he is anxious to sell off our State Parks to the highest bidder. You can bet that his buddies are standing in line with their check books out.

    Between this clown at state level and Joni Ernst and Chuck Grassley at the federal level, I think we are doomed until the next election cycle.

    In the mean time I need to finish my thesis for my master’s degree from Burger King

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  14. That Guy is the Iowa Senate majority leader?!

    OMG, epo, Birdie and all other decent Iowans, I’ll pray to all the gods that be for your survival.

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  15. Don A in Pennsyltucky says:

    I could have lived the rest of my life without ever thinking of Pearl beer again. I could have.

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  16. Senator Chelgren is a liar.
    If he lied about his education, what else has he lied about?
    I would want to know if he were my senator.

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  17. Old Fart says:

    Don’t forget!
    For this guys voters being a graduate of a prestigious non-academic burger joint course might be a bonus!
    I mean, he can (probably) answer that age old question of “Where’s the beef?”!

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  18. Sandridge says:

    Old Fart, “Where’s the beef?”…
    Don’t think we want to go there, after all, these Rethugs need tweezers to find theirs…

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  19. @Don A in Pennsyltucky
    Whatchu got against Pearl beer? True it’s hasn’t the alcoholic flatness of Old Milwaukee but when quantity is the goal…

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  20. Jane & PKM says:

    In the tradition of cheese in a can, artificial bacon on a grilled slab of soylent green ‘meat,’ the least artificial hair Orange Foolius could do is slip his comrade in a cheating a Trump U diploma for cover.

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  21. @Jane und PKM

    ET TU?????

    WTH’s wrong with cheese in a can? Next up yall’ll bad mouth SPAM! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TOO????? I ASK

    Now I’m wit ya on soylent green. “People”.

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  22. Jane & PKM says:

    Micr, I’m the original “blockhead” regarding cheese and food in general. No pre-sliced, pre-grated or dog forbid, aerosol list of ingredients that should be investigated by the EPA or sent directly to a Super Fund site to meet with Spam. Jane has not cured me, not that she really tried; she likes it that I eat my vegetables and encourage our boys to eat them, too. But she did take the opportunity as an excuse to assign me to KP duty.

    Food and diploma snob here. Unlike old Markie Chelgren, I define a diploma as something earned from an accredited and/or recognized institution. Nay nay Nanette to Messalina stretching one year of attendance into a “degree” or Donnie taking the verb Trump and turning it into a U. Trump U, believe me, and trust me are snacilbupeR precursors to bend over.

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  23. slipstream says:

    Hey! Nobody disrespects Spam and gets away unscathed.

    Had you been brave enough to come to Alaska, then foolhardy enough to visit Spenard, then suicidal enough to darken the doors of the late lamented Fly By Night Club, you would have endured a musical comedy like no other. Most of the content of said musical comedy cannot be mentioned in this respectable beauty salon, or Momma would have to drag me behind the truck. Again. Suffice to say, there may have been references to our local politicians.

    We are allowed to speak of Spam, the official state food of Alaska. Photos of cans of Spam in various improbable locations featured prominently is said comedy. Alaskans were known to pack cans of Spam on overseas tours in hopes of having their photo of Spam appear in Mr. Whitekeys’ show.

    Now stop me before I tell you about Sailor Boy Pilot Bread.

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  24. Lunargent says:

    I think the only thing that would help explain that outfit is a sobriety test.

    Or a brain scan.

    What, was his clown suit in the laundry?

    Sheesh.

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  25. Gary Halter says:

    If college faculty is dominated by Democrats why are so many college graduated Republicans. Must be doing a bad job.

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