March 29, 2018 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized
The correction of the day comes from the Wall Street Journal.
For those who didn’t go to Bible School …
And Moses lifted up his hand, and with his rod he smote the rock twice: and the water came out abundantly, and the congregation drank, and their beasts also.
Numbers 20:11
Moses made miracles. Iraq not so much.
Thanks to Deb T for the heads up.
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My name is Susan DuQuesnay Bankston. I live in Richmond, Texas, in the heart of Tom DeLay's old district. It's nuttier than squirrel poop here.
I am honored and privileged to know Miss Juanita Jean Herownself, hairdresser extraordinary and political maven. Since she does not have time to fiddle with this internet stuff, I type her website for her and you can read it if you want to. If you don't, she truly does not give a big bear's butt.
A lot of what I post here has to do with local politics, but you probably have the same folks in your local government.
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Many decades ago a secretary was taking dictation and then typed out a copy for her boss, an engineer. He got the laugh of the day when he realized that she had totally misread him when she interpreted slide rule as “sly drool.”
1I do love these disconnected communications. As a youth my hometown newspaper ran a regular column called “Pardon Us” in which they corrected the grammar errors and such from the previous edition. So while I realize these thought mis-fires happen all the time in the print media, it’s surprising some one at the WSJ didn’t catch the meaning difference between “a rock” and “Iraq”. Or maybe that was one they caught but let go by just for its comedy gold value.
2One of my favorites, from the local weekly, said that the town’s theater group gets along well because there aren’t any “pre-Madonnas.”
Best one from a long list of misheard medical transcriptions: “Examination of the genitals shows that he is circus sized.”
3Like the old Paul Simon song said…
I am Iraq
4I am an Iowan
That’s the trouble with voice-recognition software. Without an editor, you can’t tell the difference between Iraq and a hard place.
5Don A and Jan, thank you for the first LOL of my day.
6In another Paul Simon song, “Michigan seems like a dream to me now” was interpreted by one ear as “This chicken seems like a…”
If we start citing Mondegreens, this could be a very long column.
7Many decades ago, when professionals had secretaries who took dictation, a psychiatrist dictated: “Dr. John Doe, therapist, treated the patient ….”
The secretary typed and delivered the report stating “Dr. John Doe, the rapist, treated ….
8Wasn’t it determined that present-day Iraq is where the Garden of Eden was located?
9@Alan, Genesis 2:14 says that one of the four rivers that flow out of Eden is the Euphrates, which flows through Iraq. That’s if you believe anything in Genesis. The previous verse says that another of the four rivers compasseth the whole land of Ethiopia, which suggests that someone was fairly rickety on geography.
10One of my younger sisters-in-law was known to sing the hymn about “bringing in the cheese.”
11I very much enjoyed the examples of “mondegreens” and thanks to Rhea for introducing that vocabulary word.
12When my sons were little, the older one was talking about a football game with Miami, using that word several times. Finally
the little one (terrible twos) started to cry and demanded, “I want MY Yammy!”
It took a few years before he understood the explanation, since I couldn’t stop laughing which only made him madder.
I guess that’s a mondegreen. Sounds like a lyric from Jabberwocky.
@maryelle, I think “mondegreen” applies only to misheard song lyrics. It started with a columnist who heard an old ballad as “They have slain the Earl of Murray and Lady Mondegreen” when the actual line was “and laid him on the green.” She invited people to send in more, and had quite a list of “mondegreens.” Books of them have been published, such as “Scuse Me While I Kiss This Guy” (Jimi Hendrix: “Scuse me while I kiss the sky”)
As for misheard everything else, I’m not sure there’s a term, though maybe “mondegreen” could be expanded if not.
13I just want to say thank you all and
14Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!
Y’all recall the major hit Houstonian BJ Thomas had with Hooked on the Ceiling?
How bout that lyric from We Will Rock You (Queen) “Kickin’ your cat all over the place!”
Or CCR’s Bad Moon Risin’ “there’s a bathroom on the right”.
And finally for Loopy, “This is the dawning of the Age of Asparagus”, as sung by the 5th Dimension
15Iron Butterfly’s “In the Garden of Eden” became “On a ganna da vida” … due, I have been told, to use of substances.
As a child I thought the Christmas carol line “Fall on your knees” was “all on your niece” which didn’t sound very nice at all, and might be why I was never a very good christian.
16How old were you when you quit singing, “round john virgin”, in Silent Night? I used to wonder who the heck was this guy.
17Iraq-miracles? Not so much, but it did make fools out of the last 4 stoopid wingnut potii. Priceless.
18There’s a YouTube live broadcast I watch from S. Africa. One of presenters who is on occasionally has a voice and a giggle that drives me crazy, so I turn the sound off and the captions on. The U.S. brained computer that puts the captions up doesn’t understand South African accents, and some of the most hilarious mondegreens (first time I have heard that word) come up on the screen.
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