Texas Congressimbecile Lamar Smith, who is in fact just as goofy as he looks, represents the Texas Hill Country in congress.

Lamar, who is known as a shade follower because he’s too lazy to get up and work, is head of the Science, Space, and Technology Committee of the United States of America congress.  We don’t know how that happened.  It appears to be just real bad luck.

After years of being a bump on a log, Lamar has found something a mission, a purpose, a rally flag.  Asteroids!  They are coming to kill you!  Do something, dammit!

Science, Space, and Technology Committee Chairman Lamar Smith (R-Texas) today released the following statement after reports of an unforeseen meteor exploding in the sky above Russia early this morning, on the same day that a large asteroid is scheduled to pass relatively close to Earth.

Chairman Smith: “Today’s events are a stark reminder of the need to invest in space science. Asteroid 2012 DA14 passed just 17,000 miles from Earth, less than the distance of a round trip from New York to Sydney. And this morning, a much smaller meteorite hit near the Russian city of Chelyabinsk, damaging buildings and injuring hundreds.

Okay, now I am scared that my heart is skipping more beats than a drummer with hiccups.  I’m looking to my congressman for a solution.  Get me all scared about something that’s happened once in my lifetime and then save me from something that may never happen again, dammit.  Save me!

I dunno about you, but Truman put his asteroid-safety hat on and hid under his blanket.

Which, I am here to tell you, is certainly more helpful than what Chairman Lamar Smith wants to do.  He’s all fluffed up and got a pocket of courage and has decided to confront this menace to humanity straight forward.    He’s going to hold a hearing on it.

Okay, we’ve got sick people, hungry people, uneducated people, bankers robbing the American people, and more gun shooting than the OK Corral.  But, Chairman Smith wants to hold hearing on asteroids.

I know I feel safer.

Thanks to Kathleen for the heads up.