Oh y’all, I am going to assume that all of Trump’s lawyers are getting paid up front because nothing breaks America’s heart more than a lawyer getting screwed by Trump.

I can promise you that we are going to see hijinxs and romps through logic galore during the court battle between Trump and reality.

And it started last week in Pennsylvania.  One of Trump’s lawyers went before a federal judge whining that there weren’t enough Republicans in the counting room.  I suspect he should have added, “… to meet Trump’s high standards of Republican intimidation and exposure of innocent people to a deadly pandemic,” but he didn’t.

And then it gets fun.

“When the judge pressed the Trump campaign lawyer if there were observers in the room from the campaign, the lawyer, Jerome Marcus, said, “There’s a non-zero number of people in the room.”

The judge, Paul Diamond of the Eastern District of Pennsylvania, a George W. Bush appointee, also pointed out he believed the President’s case appeared to have no reason to be in federal court, and even cracked a joke that the lawyer “shouldn’t quit his day job” when the campaign handed the judge a hand-drawn map of the ballot counting room.

A non-zero number? Oh no. So, here’s Trump’s lawyer in the wrong court, submitting the wrong writ and giving the wrong answer. See why I suggest he get paid up front?

How many votes did Trump get in the 2020 election, Ms. Juanita? “I am sorry to have to admit it was a non-zero number.”

Please put on your seat belt. This is gonna be a bumpy but awfully fun ride.

Thanks to Ralph for the heads up.

A company run by Trump’s digital director was caught sending thousands of incendiary texts to Trump supporters telling them to amass in Philadelphia and falsely demonstrate that Dems were stealing the election.  This will pretty much shoot down Giuliani’s claims of voter fraud.

Trump just tweeted …

Good point. The media doesn’t make the call.

Actually, it’s the dancing in the streets that makes it official.

I am exactly today years old when I learned that Stacey Abrams has another skill set.

She writes romance novels.

I am told they are a little steamy.

I guess I’m going to have to try it.

I’ve been scanning the news and Twitter and the only big names supporting Trump’s fantasy that he won the election and now we need to keep counting are few and far between but, nonetheless, let us rejoice in their pain.

Lindsay Graham 

.

Less than two hours after the Associated Press officially called the presidential election for Joe Biden, Republican Senator Lindsay Graham released a statement detailing his plans to dispute the results. “It is imperative that all credible allegations of voting irregularities and misconduct be investigated to ensure the integrity of the 2020 elections.”

Which is why we need to start working on the Georgia senate races real soon.  If Lindsay ain’t chairman, Lindsay has to shuddup the whining.

Newt Gingrich

It’s time for us to get mad. This election is unlike any we have ever witnessed. The systemic corruption is breath taking.https://t.co/Mahg7lGPxg

— Newt Gingrich (@newtgingrich) November 6, 2020

Newt wants to stay in Italy with Calista, where she is ambassador to the Pope. You forgot she was even alive, didn’t you? That part was nice, but I doubt Catholic Joe will want to keep her there.

Steve Bannon

Twitter banned him and so did I. You’re very welcome.

Those Cheerful Folks at Breitbart.

Oh dear Lord.  What a mess.

I don’t look for this list to grow much.  Rumor has it that both Jared and Melania have told him to take his loss like a grown up.

Ain’t gonna happen.

Yesterday, during the avalanche of news that Biden had just won the election for President of the United States, Rudy Giuliani and other swamp creatures were holding a “big news conference” on the outskirts of Philadelphia in the parking lot of the Four Seasons.  Hotel, you ask?  Oh, no.  It’s much better than that.  The Four Seasons Total Landscaping.  When I saw it on Trump’s Twitter feed yesterday morning, I thought it was just Trump’s usual idiocy, but it’s better than that; a LOT better than that.  Trump had actually tweeted earlier that said “big” press conference would be at the Four Seasons Hotel, but when he found out that indeed it was the landscaping company, someone deleted that tweet and issued a corrected one.  So, apparently Trump doesn’t have a building named for him in Philadelphia so he gave orders to get the Four Seasons Hotel, so some harried and bullied staffer rushed to book the event, apparently not thinking there was more than one Four Seasons in Philadelphia.  So Rudy shows up here:

That’s right, here is the former “America’s Mayor” turned presidential slanderer giving Trump’s “big news conference”  from the shabby parking lot of a landscaping company sandwiched between a crematorium and porn shop.  Next to the boat with Trump flags at the bottom of Lake Travis, there is no better metaphor for Trump’s disastrous infestation of the WH.  Oh, and here’s the boat:

Here’s hoping the landscape company owner got paid up front.