I Know The New Pope is Liberal But There Might Be Some Limits

March 27, 2014 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Fairbanks, Alaska’s Father Sean P. Thompson has got himself in a bit of a pickle.

He got arrested for DUI.  He was stopped by state troopers for speeding and erratic driving.

But, it doesn’t end here.  No, sireee, whoopee.

Screen Shot 2014-03-27 at 2.33.39 PMBitz asked if he was carrying any weapons, the complaint said. Thomson reported a .357-caliber handgun in the back seat but not a 9mm pistol he carried in his back pocket, Bitz said. Another pocket revealed a bag with a small quantity of marijuana, Bitz said.

Thomson blew into a hand-held breath alcohol test machine and it recorded a breath-alcohol content of .247 percent, Bitz said. The legal standard for intoxication is .08 percent.

It appears he was triple drunk, which means there will be no communion wine at the parish for a looooong time, had enough weapons to take on a small country or several large bears, and was stoned out of his mind.

Unless he’s the reincarnation of Hunter Thompson, he’s got some ‘splainin’ to do.

Thanks to Dean in Alaska for the heads up.

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0 Comments to “I Know The New Pope is Liberal But There Might Be Some Limits”


  1. UmptyDump says:

    Didn’t this guy once pal around with Father Guido Sarducci?

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  2. Uncle Dave says:

    He did not abuse anyone. He did not accidentally or purposely shoot someone. Driving while under the influence was a very unChristian thing to do, but he did not injure anyone, and I think it was St. Paul who pointed out that all have sinned and fallen short of the Glory of God. Not knowing what other offenses he may have committed, I hope the police and church officals will give him a stiff fine, a stern lecture, suspend his drivers license, and suggest that he step out back to smoke.

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  3. Uncle Dave says:

    And take his guns away from him!

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  4. Marcia in CO says:

    And no emailing with Rob Ford in Toronto, Canada, trying to set up a play date!!

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  5. Old Fart says:

    Yeah, but outside of that, he’s a really righteous dude!

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  6. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    Father Sean won’t be the first man of the cloth to self-medicate and find himself in rehab. Isn’t anything over 2.0 near a point of alcohol poisoning, unless the person has been imbibing heavily for a period of time to build up a high tolerance? The addition of the marijuana to the alcohol does lean toward self-medication.

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  7. maryelle says:

    Wait a minute. This guy could have killed people driving while totally intoxicated. He should have his license revoked, guns confiscated and be required to go into rehab.
    Let’s not whitewash the damage drunks behind the wheel do. He’s just lucky he was caught before committing homicide.

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  8. Aggieland liz says:

    At least there were no altar servers or pornography involved! That said, I’m REALLY glad he’s not my parish priest! We have enough of the usual parish antics going on attm, thank you very much!

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  9. e platypus onion says:

    Come on Frenchy La Pierre,educate us libs as to how being drunk x 3,and carrying pot and a concealed weapon makes this guy a responsible gun owner. Dude will prolly claim god was his co-pilot so god can get fined,too.

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  10. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    e platypus onion, “Dude will prolly claim god was his co-pilot so god.” But how will he decide between freewill or Satan lifting his elbow for all that alcohol? The ‘Gods save all crowd’ sure has a problem with God finding them in their hour of need.

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  11. Man oh man! I bet he’s glad that he wasn’t one of the guys who elected the current Pope who is cutting wheat from chaff big time these days. See story in news about the Bishop of Bling “retiring” and the firing of the guy who was literally a bag man!! This isn’t the first guy with a bassackwards collar to have a problem with a free willing elbow. I do recall a certain southern bishop getting nabbed by the cops after shifting too much. It made all the papers in a highly non-Catholic area of the country. Just don’t put this curate in the same rehab as Lindsey Lohan. She’s still a mess!

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  12. slipstream says:

    Well, obviously, a Catholic priest needs two concealed handguns. What if those dadgummed Methodists sneak up on him?

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  13. If the old standards still apply, he’ll be sent to rehab, then reassigned… depends on the Bishop. Some just palm off their problem priests, some keep a mean old priest as a pastor somewhere to either straighten out the drunks and screw-ups, or drive em out of the priesthood.

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