I Got It!

August 04, 2020 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

So, Thelma and I were having a discussion last weekend about what name we’d give to a male Karen.

Let me stop here and say loudly that I have some beloved friends named Karen, and I feel real bad for them.  Their name has been tainted and none of them are truly Karens. On the other hand, it’s a handy way to explain somebody acting the fool because of white privilege which they don’t even think exists.

Thelma and I tossed around a few ideas for a male Karen and we came up with one that seems to have stuck.

Tucker.

The advantage being that there are very few people named Tucker so innocent people don’t get hurt.  The upside is that everybody knows the one Tucker and he’s Karen in a bow tie and an expensive haircut.

So, we’re going with Tucker.

Ya know, we’re getting more and more proud of that.

 

 

Yeah, Tucker contends that it’s “probably illegal” for Joe Biden to express perimeters on his choice for Veep.

Yeah, he did.

“For what could very well be the most important job on Earth, Biden has decided to hire exclusively on the basis of qualities that are both immutable and completely irrelevant—race and gender,” Carlson huffed. “And that’s it. But wait a second, you ask, isn’t that insulting? Isn’t it wrong? Isn’t it probably illegal?”

Since the birth of this country, with only two exceptions, the veep selection has been limited to white males.  Tucker finds nothing, absolutely nothing, wrong with that.

And the fact that it’s not true that he’s only considering black women – Elizabeth Warren is not black – doesn’t matter one rotten stick in hell to Tucker.  Tucker wants white males, dammit. And they better be straight. And good hair. And look and act exactly like Tucker Carlson.

Yeah, we’re going with Tucker. Tucker fits.

 

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0 Comments to “I Got It!”


  1. My neighbor’s hound is named Tucker.
    Okay, “ Tucker” it is , I can live with that, besides it rhymes with * ucker

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  2. Tucker, perfect, thank you.

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  3. Harry Eagar says:

    Biden is not hiring the vice presidential candidate. We are.

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  4. Sam in Superior says:

    I like Tucker too. Just change that first letter and make it a first name – #ucker Tucker

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  5. Jane & PKM says:

    With the emergence of covidiot couples, “Tucker & Karen” doesn’t have the necessary symmetry. And, the thousands of innocent “Karen” really do deserve a break. Covidiot 45 is the leader of the covidiots, while Jughead and Ivodka Kushner are his ‘mitigating’ vectors. There are probably many decent men named Jared, but probably a decent Ivanka would be extremely rare if not nonexistent. Is the baby name registry out for 2020? But seriously. Who would name their baby Jughead? Maybe a few innocent babies did suffer the fate of being christened Ivanka this year.

    To protect the innocent, hyper crazed covidiots on display should be referred to as Jughead or Ivodka.

    Joyce @1, we also know a really sweet dog named Tucker who definitely does not deserve inclusion with the racist cur T. Carlson or the covidiots.

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  6. Tucker should look into whether it’s legal for a Presidential Candidate who was married three times and paid off porn workers, etc, etc, etc could limit his VP choice to an Evangelical, so the religious rightwing would hold their nose and vote Republican.

    Tucker found it “insulting” that a VP might be picked based on only two criteria, race & gender (his determination). So what about choosing someone based on a single qualification? Which is not even a qualifier if there’s a separation of church & state?

    Only a Tucker could ignore all of that.

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  7. Grandma Ada says:

    And why was Doctor Ben Carlson installed at HUD?

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  8. I guess Spiro Agnew is dead, but I think Dan Quayle is still around, and Sarah Palin could prolly be drafted.
    Tucker wants “blue ribbon” candidates.

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  9. thatotherjean says:

    Excellent choice. “Tucker” it is!

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  10. Tucker is very good, but think of the innocent dogs. I kind of like Jughead myself.

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  11. Buttermilk Sky says:

    I’ve heard male Karens described as “Chad,” like the one at DHS.

    In his racist rant about the John Lewis eulogy last week, Tucker did call Obama “Mr. Hawaii guy,” making him the first Foxnick to admit that he was born in Hawaii. So that’s something, right?

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  12. Ormond Otvos says:

    Probably “parameters”…

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  13. Old Fart says:

    Tuckers are snowflakes, fixated with the History written by people that believe economic exploitation by category is a requirement of our society,,,

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  14. The Surly Professor says:

    Sadly, the young-uns on the innertubes have already decided that a male Karen is a Kevin.

    They have also decided that the collective noun for a group of Karens is a “privilege”.

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  15. Fred Farklestone says:

    “Tucker wants white males, dammit.And they better be straight.”

    How do we know Tucker is straight?

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  16. Larry From Colorado says:

    Grandma Ada: Ben Carlson was the most unqualified person tRump could find.

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  17. NicaBrian says:

    As much as I’ve been leaning towards (hanging on) Chad, Tucker is perfect. For one thing the chances of a non entitled non white male with the name Tucker is probably in single digits. The best though, is when you use the name Tucker in those situations there will be instant recognition. While there are people who like what he does, he has to be one of the most unlikeable people on the planet.
    “Hey, I’d like you to meet my friend Tucker.” Said no one, ever.

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  18. Opinionated Hussy says:

    Unfortunately I know a couple of unentitled good democrats named Tucker. And I think the Zoomers have dubbed male Karens as ‘Kens’.

    As for a group name, I think ‘a privilege of Karens’ is perfect!

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  19. clarence berry says:

    Well Carlson, the dumb tucker, is perpetually in the wrong; what else are we to expect from Repugnuts?

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  20. +1 for that useless f… Tucker.

    @Opinionated Hussy
    On Planet Micr, Kens are found only with Barbies. In turn Barbies are chemically blonde Karens, on which “Everything that can be done, has been done.”

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  21. Jane & PKM says:

    Fred Farklestone @ 15 it’s improbable that T. Carlson is ‘straight.’ The conservatives like the Vice Poodle Pence are the ones declaring that homosexuality is a choice. They seem so certain it is a choice as if in the throes of their bisexual meanderings, they made a choice and are projecting their apparent choice onto others.

    Their alleged sexuality isn’t an issue to most people, it’s just that most of us wish they’d place as much importance and effort toward acting human as the do in their striving to be straight, white males.

    LOL and about that white thing? If it wasn’t so sciency, it would be worth the effort to provide them with DNA tests to burst their bubbles. Or, if black isn’t beautiful as well as Latinx and the full spectrum of human colors, then why do those clowns spend so much time in tanning booths despite the health risks?

    Micr, good buddy. Please. Please tell me that all that good money spent on Ivodka, Messy, Kellyanne and others, yet that is “as good as it gets”?

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  22. treehugger says:

    And why aren’t we calling these women Ivankas?

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  23. Tiger_Ftg says:

    Tucker Quarrelsome?

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  24. treehugger@22, the going reason for using “Karen” is apparently an old Dane Cook comedy sketch where “Karen” is “the friend nobody likes” and “Brian” is her male counterpart. I like your suggestion of Ivanka *much* better; sorry that didn’t catch on instead. And while I had sweet friend named Tucker once, I think that’s a great name for the male version.

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  25. @Jane & PKM,

    Old friends, I’d have bet the rent check that iVodka was a new alcoholic beverage by Apple, for those already drinking the Kool-Aid. I spose I’m wrong.

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  26. Fred Farklestone says:

    Jane & PKM & 6:07

    I like to use the following as a comment when someone starts pontificating about straight people v gays! It has shut up quite a few anti-gay posters!

    https://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Haggard%27s_Law

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  27. “White Privilege” Is A Racist Enterprise
    Most of the time I live in my own little world, trying to understand and to build good things. But once in a while new pollutions seep in and require my attention. And so it has become with “white privilege.”
    It is now common (and I can hardly believe I’m writing this, even though I know it’s true) to hear “I hate white people” in supposedly educated circles… among people with university degrees.
    And so I’ll deal with this new barbarity and get it out of my way:
    White privilege is a verdict. It is a conclusion, not a question and not an argument. It claims abuse on the part of the white person… on the part of all white persons.
    The verdict is based wholly on skin color. Understand, please, that this is the same as any other ethnic slur, up to and including the so-called n-word. It applies directly to skin tone, condemning a billion individuals at once.
    White privilege is absolutely divisive. It claims that white skin defines an individual as a recipient of stolen goods, as a thief, as an abuser, and as an unenlightened ignoramus. All white people are defined this way by the term. It is yet another in the long stream of us-them divides that foment violence. From petty crime to total war, this is the root.
    White privilege is anti-mind. It displaces observation, reason and balance. It barbarically shoves a billion people into a single mold and condemns the lot of them.
    White privilege is dogma. The use of white privilege dances past reason and steps quickly past the slow and thorny process of trying facts and discovering justice. Rather, its user gets instant status by upholding the dogma that white people are inherently flawed, poisoned, stupid and inferior.
    White privilege is full-blown arrogance. The user of the term claims to know everything relevant about you, your history and your soul. And this stands upon group-think and self-aggrandizement. The user surrounds him or herself with a chorus of fellow dogmatists, and jointly they undertake to praise themselves by degrading others.
    White privilege is envy, sublimating into hate. White privilege is ultimately the slogan of people who hold painful opinions of themselves. Wishing to be free of those feelings is understandable, but envy weaponizes the pain and freezes it in place. And what one envies, one soon enough hates.
    Someone who thinks of himself or herself as a competent actor in the universe does not require the degradation of others (much less an entire race) to feel good about themselves. Rather they work, they build, and they seek to cooperate with other people of goodwill. Calling white privilege is an attempt to subdue people that its user sees as above them; to bring them down and to supplant them, ending up with their stuff. It is a crime very much like communism, and if left unchecked it will have similar results.
    White privilege is a weapon. Make no mistake, calling out white privilege is an attempt to maim, to diminish and to inflict anguish. (Occasionally, I suppose, it’s an attempt to fit in, making it a lead-in to the desire to injure.).
    Ultimately, calling white privilege is devolution. It is the road back to ritual slaughter and killing the other simply because he or she is other.
    All Racism Is Poison
    Racism is despicable wherever it appears. We are all individuals. Skin color, language, etc. are trivial differences. More than that, they are accidents.
    One of the oldest civilizing truths is that justice should be blind. White privilege is precisely the opposite of that. As is any other flavor of racism.
    All forms of racism are dark, degrading and devolutionary. This one included.
    ~ Paul Rosenberg

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  28. Jonathon Hubbert says:

    1. ‘White Privilege’ is a fact. When 90% of my Infantry Platoon in VietNam was black, discrimination and prejudice had an immuatble hand in distribution of risk. There were plenty of white, infantry trained soldiers in VietNam who worked in the rear — performing menial tasks for which they weren’t specifically trained.
    2. I nominate “Butch” & “Muffy” for the ubiquitous tasks associated with W.P.
    3. There were no persons of color in my Branch Basic Course, nor were there any in the OCS Classes for which I was a ‘Tac Officer’ at Ft.Belvoir, the Engineer School, for the year prior to my visit to VietNam.
    4. Any one denying the existence of White Privilege gets massive deterrent feedback from me.

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  29. My sainted father, Marine, discovered white privilege and changed his world view one Sunday in Texas around 1993 when 60 Minutes detailed the story of a Black Marine helo driver, Captain Marcus Hartman, who lost his ticket after the same white captain failed Hartman twice after flight tests. Hartman went on to Harvard Law School and as far as I know, today practices law someplace.
    Hartman quotes an exchange with Gen Charles Krulak, “You know, captain, perhaps there is a problem when it’s easier to get into Harvard Law School than it is to stay in the Marine Corps.”

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  30. Steve from Beaverton says:

    Carlson’s latest is there’s no proof of how George Floyd was killed. I guess 2 autopsies and and plenty of video isn’t proof enough for him. What a (rhymes withTucker).

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  31. Susan Elizabeth Yardley says:

    I’d feel sorry for those whose given name is Karen, except that Lazy Susans have been around for years.

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  32. Yea, one of my best friends is named Karen and she’s as far from a “Karen” as is possible.

    And Tucker Carlson is an ass. And so is Miss Linzy Graham. What a jerk in today’s hearing with Sally Yates. Besides continually interrupting her answers, he questioned her in between the other senators. Took far more than 5 minutes the others got. Rude and crude. I hope Biden nominates Yates for AG. Just desserts for the crazy Rs.

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  33. D. Karen Wilkerson says:

    As a real-life Karen for almost 70 years, I must confess some chagrin for becoming the poster child of mindless bimbettes who can’t act right. That ain’t my style. But if somebody’s gotta donate their name, I’m glad I decided to use my first initial with the Karen part a long time ago.

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  34. Gaz. Dan Quayle has a son named Tucker. Marilyn’s maiden name was Tucker.

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