Just when you think Rick Perry cannot embarrass Texas any more than he already has, the boy opens his mouth and doesn’t know the number of people on the Supreme Court – even on the day when all of Texas is waiting for the Supreme Court to rule on redistricting – or Judge Sonya Sotomayor’s name.  There’s You Tubes, y’all, or I wouldn’t believe it myownself.

And he couldn’t remember where we were at war, either.

There’s a whole lot of stuff that you gotta know to be President.  But, apparently you do not need to know crap to be Texas Governor.

Meanwhile, Anita Perry has an answer for all this —  Jesus, of course.

“I pray for him to have strength and wisdom and for the right words to come out of his mouth and to be patient because we’re not on his timetable, we’re on God’s timetable.”

I’m real happy for you, Anita, and Imma let you finish, but Jesus had the best album this year.  No, no, no, Anita, you ain’t blaming this stuff on Jesus, Girl.

But, at least Anita did offer to help Rick.  She explained to the Christian Broadcasting Network —

“The right word might not come out of our mouths,” she said. “But if I could have remembered that word, I would have gone and put it in his mouth at that time.”

Well, I suspect worse things than that have been in Rick Perry’s mouth.

Come home, Rick.  I think Jesus and me are starting to take this personally.

Thanks to Irene, Bananas and Carl for the heads-up.

Okay, I hate to have to do this, but we need a collection of Rick Perry ads to greet the boy when he comes home to Texas.  The meme forms here.

We’re gonna kick it off right here.  MOMMA, DO NOT CLICK THIS LINK.  It has bad words in it. But, it’s funny.  And a non-Momma-safe ‘nother one.

I know there are hundreds of these out there so in the comment section, post the link to your favorite and let Momma know whether or not to click the link.  Momma may have a bar of soap and be a Baptist, but she thinks Rick Perry is an idiot.

Rick Perry, a man not content to leave this race with what little dignity and intelligence he has left, and I do mean little, decided to go out wearing a jacket from Brokeback Mountain

and yammering on about how persecuted he is because he is a Super DeLux Brand Christian and therefore not gay because people who love Jesus like he does have never, ever been gay.  So, there ya go.

Reminder:  Rick Perry is positively not gay.  Write that down somewhere because you’ll need it later.

Perry’s campaign team had to disable the “Like and Dislike” buttons on YouTube when their Dislike button got stomped on 250,000 times.

And even his top staff is fighting over the ad.  I don’t think that has anything to do with the Brokeback Mountain jacket but probably what Rick is hiding under it.

If Rick Perry wanted to make history, it’s working.  He may well be the first presidential candidate with negative polls numbers.

But, as a Yellow Dog Democrat, I would like to personally thank Rick for spending all of his rich friends’ money attacking Newt and Mitt in his latest ad.  In the new ad, Rick calls himself “an outsider,” which is real close to being a loner.  In the basement.  With kerosene and rags.  And an eye on the Texas Governor’s mansion.  Oops.

Thanks to customer, Brian.

Merry Gingrich, Ya’ll!

I think it was Lily Tomlin who said, “No matter how cynical I get, I can’t keep up.”

Stuff like this makes all my nuts, bolts, and screws loose.

… thirty big corporations actually spent more money lobbying the federal government between 2008 and 2010 than they spent in taxes. For example, General Electric — one of the top 10 most profitable companies in the world — got a net tax rebate of $4.7 billion during this period. Meanwhile, it spent $84 million lobbying the federal government.

That ain’t right.

Thanks to Think Progress, we can even get a picture that you can paint on the barn in waterproof paint.

Click the little one to get the big one.

Babe, this got me so mad that I can’t even spit straight.  I’m not mad at the corporations.  Hell, they’re just doing what in their best interest.  I’m mad at the people we elected who have For Sale or Rent tattooed on their butts.

Texas Ellen sent me a link that jumps right on this issue with both feet.  From this day forward, I am prepared to greet every congressvarmint I know with, “Hello, you need to quit being a whore.”

Thanks to Carl and TexasEllen for the heads-up.

I was busy yesterday.  I know this is difficult for you to believe, but I get invited to fancy parties and stuff.  It takes me an hour to fix my hair and another hour to convince myself that I should behave at the party.  That means I have things to do.  Lotsa things to do.

So, I get home late last night to discover that (1) Rick Perry has demanded that all gay people and suspected gay people and people who might know a gay person and people who ever entertained the thought of a speaking to a gay person and all employees of the Happy Harlot Holding Company and anybody who has ever had a gay old time and people who have donned gay apparel and Zorro  have to register with the Rick Perry for President Committee where you will receive printed googled directions to Satan’s Hideaway, and (2) Newt Gingrich is having a gay affair with John Bolton.  Or something.

I dunno.  Maybe I had too much wine last night but that’s how it sounded to me.

So Rick Perry threw a Hail Mary pass, which in this case might be considered a Hell Mary, Joseph and Baby Jesus Pass because what he said has nothing even remotely to do with the Prince of Peace.  To paraphrase in my words, “You don’t need to be in the pew every Sunday to know there’s something wrong in this country when Rick Perry speaks for people of faith.”

It is amazing what our boy will do to get attention.  The problem isn’t our assault on religion, Honey, the problem is religion’s assault on us.

And then there’s Newt Gingrich openly flaunting the law by promising a cabinet post prior to an election.  But Gingrich violating ethics laws is expected and ain’t the news.  The news is that he’s promising to one of the Friendly Folks Who Brought You The Iraq War, John Bolton.

Yes, that creepy John Bolton.  Who wanted to nuke Iran.  Just for the helluvit.  Just because it made a big boom noise and that’s pretty cool.

Kinda makes you wonder what Newt is promising Dick Cheeny and Paul Wolfowitz.  Oops, sorry about ruining your holidays with that thought.

Thanks to Sandy for the heads-up on Newt.