Lyin’ Eyes – a famous country western song – immediately came to mind when I read this.

Nope. I have eyes. Either he’s not missing lunch or he eats the whole rest of the damn day.

The point they were trying to make is to refute “a report that the commander-in-chief spends his days obsessing over TV coverage and eating fries.”  Because, you know, it looks like that’s what he’s doing.

White House staffers said the president works around the clock and can make five dozen work-related calls a day during the pandemic.

“I can tell you that the biggest concern I have as a new chief of staff is making sure he gets some time to get a quick bite to eat,” White House chief of staff Mark Meadows told The Post.

Five dozen?  Honey, that’s 60 calls. If he calls Rudy Giuliani 30 times, does that count as one or almost three dozen?

Look, if he’s doing 60 calls a day, then he ain’t doing this president thing right.  Plus, he barely knows 60 words, so this is kinda hard to believe.

But, here’s his proof that he’s working hard.

Yep – running around in circles demanding to be praised is hard work.

Thanks to Kary for the heads up.

Through the years when I want to talk about the most Republican, white, redneck place in Texas, I’m gonna tell you about Pasadena or Beaumont, but it’s usually Beaumont.  Beaumont has the same exact amount of churches as it does adult book stores.  I think that’s the law or something.

Well, Beaumont elected itself a female mayor by the name of Becky Ames.  Becky has been mayor since 2007. She is a certified Donald Trump cheerleader and was proud to be among the recognized public officials at Trump’s inauguration.

Well, Becky got herself in a little trouble.  She issued a stay-at-home order for the city of Beaumont and then, God love her, it just got to be more than a proper Texas big haired woman could be expected to tolerate.  Last week, Becky got caught soaking her hands at a local nail salon.

She swears she was just soaking in acetone to remove her old fake nails.

“I did not do anything wrong,” she told the paper. “I would not be upset with anyone who I found out did this.”

Ames said she had powdered nails removed at the salon and was not there for a manicure, according to the paper. The fake nails were causing her pain, she said.

On Thursday, the mayor issued a statement apologizing for visiting the salon, calling it a “lapse in judgment,” Fox 4 Beaumont reported.

“I should never have entered the salon last Tuesday,” Ames said. “I did not intend to take personal privilege while asking others to sacrifice, and for that, I am truly remorseful. As an elected official I am held to a higher standard.”

People may be dying but, Honey, nails are nails and they were hurting poor Becky.

I think she probably thought to prepare for this lockdown by purchasing a pallet of hairspray before it sold out.  Bad hair hurts, you know.

She’ll be reelected for sure because the people of Beaumont understand that looking good is the biggest part of the game. And Honey, they knew that long before Trump made it the national motto.

Becky and the salon are both being investigated.

Okay, wanna know why Trump is disappearing during his afternoon rant-a-thons on national teevee?

He doesn’t want to answer questions about this:

They were gargling all kinds of stuff but mostly Lysol and bleach.  Lord knows they swallow all his lies.

Okay, Alfredo over at the Dairy Queen found something fun for your locked-in weekend. The Trump Campaign spent $137,000 last month trying to silence two women.

According to FEC reports by the Trump campaign, it was a great month for Trump’s lawyers. Take a look.

Click here to see it full size.

LaRocca Hornik is representing the Trump campaign in the Jessica Denson and A.J. Delgado sex discrimination cases in the Southern District of New York.

And they’re losing.

Badly. I mean, Lysol in your veins badly.

Here:  Appeals Court Vacates $50K Arbitration Award Against Ex-Trump Campaign Staffer for Alleged NDA Violation

Here:  This Provision In Trump’s Infamous NDAs Could Come Back To Haunt Him

Here:  Former Trump campaign spokeswoman AJ Delgado sues over pregnancy discrimination

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