Cameron Jeffrey Wilson, who is 27 years old and lives in Washington State, had himself one of those days.
It all started when he had a pistol in his pocket that accidentally went off and he shot himself in the genitals. Now, you’d think that would be the worst thing that could happen to you in one day. But, it wasn’t.
Instead of heading directly to a hospital, Wilson instructed his girlfriend to first drive to Lincoln Park in Wenatchee, where he gave the pistol to a friend, the affidavit said. A 13-time convicted felon, it is illegal for Wilson to possess a firearm.
But oh hell, it’s still not over.
As he was having surgery, a balloon filled with marijuana fell out of his anus.
‘Bout the same time that was happening, Chelan County sheriff’s detectives arrived at the scene and discovered a pair of bloody jeans in his car. The jeans had methamphetamines in the pocket.
Instead of arresting him at the hospital, detectives decided that he, and no doubt they, would be better off letting him go home and charging him later. He healed up a little and turned himself in two days after he was officially charged.
This should have been the end. It wasn’t.
As they were searching him another bag of marijuana was found in his … oh hell, you know where.
They finally get him booked and into a cell.
From the jail, Wilson made multiple calls to his girlfriend asking her not to cooperate with investigators, according to a probable cause affidavit filed April 26 in superior court. Authorities listened to the calls and subsequently charged him with four counts of tampering with a witness.
Now see, the cops have a gunshot, bloody jeans, drugs, and an anus. Do they really need her testimony?
He’s being charged with witness tampering, second-degree felon in possession of a firearm and unlawful possession of meth, as well as possession of a controlled substance in a correctional facility. And all he did was shoot himself in the winkie and things went downhill from there.
He’s being held on $110,000 bond.
Thanks to Fenway Fran for the heads up.