Okay, stop whatever you were doing and giggle your butt off.
Devin Nunes is suing Twitter because people are saying bad things about him on there that are causing him great pain and suffering. No, I am not kidding. He used those exact words.
He wants $600 million in damages. Yeah, well, so do I but do you see me whining about Franny Sue Jackson, my competitor over at “Get Your Locks Off,” saying I give crappy haircuts? No, I’m a proud grown up woman and I would never give Franny Sue acknowledgement that I even know who she is.
To sue somebody, you have to prove that you’ve been damaged in some way. Wanna know the damages that Nunes claims? He says …
… that Twitter played a key role in slowing Nunes’s 2018 re-election campaign, when compared with his larger wins in previous re-election bids. The lawsuit said that Twitter allowed “fake accounts” to slander Nunes, including one by a user who claimed to be Nunes’s mother.
Oh, it hurt him so much that he didn’t win his gerrymandered district as big as he usually does, and I am certain that has nothing to do with the fact that he stole peoples’ babies, locked them in cages, and won’t give them back. Ot that he made a total horse’s patootie of himself running back and forth to the White House so they could tell him what he should do next in committee hearings.
The Twitter accounts he says ran a “defamation campaign of stunning breadth and scope, one that no human being should ever have to bear and suffer in their whole life” (seriously) include @DevinNunesMom, @DevinCow, @fireDevinNunes.
Never again should any Republican call any progressive a snowflake.
Hey Nunes – you’re a jerk and ninny. I hope that hurt like hell.