Archive for January, 2016

That’s Almost Correct

January 26, 2016 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Speaker of the House and third in the line for the presidency Paul Ryan had a pronouncement this morning.

House Speaker Paul Ryan described the negative campaigning among GOP presidential candidates as “a conservative circular firing squad” that could cost Republicans the 2016 election.

No, Honey, the party’s outdated ideas, racial division, intolerance, and greed is what going to cost you the election.

The circular firing squad just makes it a whole lot more fun to watch.

Thanks to Bryan for the heads up.

Get Up and Dance On Top of the Table!

January 25, 2016 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

The Harris County probe into Planned Parenthood selling human organs has ended in an indictment …

… of the damn people making the incrimination video.

 

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Here ya go.

A Harris County grand jury probe into Planned Parenthood of the Gulf Coast ended Monday with the indictments of two anti-abortion activists.

David Daleiden and Sandra Merritt were both indicted for tampering with a governmental record.

And …

Daleiden and Merritt were involved in undercover videos that surfaced last year appearing to show a Planned Parenthood official discussing reimbursement fees associated with fetal tissue procurement and donation.

The videos prompted Gov. Greg Abbott to call for an investigation into the organization.

I predict that Greg Abbott will call for an investigation of the investigation on National Investigation Day for Investigations Anonymous with an Investigation Beater.

My question:  who gets to tell Greg Abbott that he has egg all over his face?

This is what happens when you do away with Pick-a-Pal grand juries in Texas.  It also means that Greg Abbott signed the law that’s gonna make him look silly.  Karma, Baby.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

Fun With Guns: Pier One Gun Edition

January 25, 2016 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

So a guy in Round Rock, Texas (think Austin) decides to visit the local Pier One with a handgun openly displayed on his hip.  Somewhere in the toss pillows or papasan chairs, he decides this shopping adventure wasn’t all it was cracked up to be so …

A man who was openly carrying a handgun, which became legal this year, ended up robbing a Round Rock Pier One store Thursday, according to a police press release.

A man had entered the store, displayed a small black handgun in a holster and demanded the clerks open the cash register, police said. He fled after the clerks gave him money, according to police.

The coolest thing about open carry is that you don’t actually have to hold the gun to rob the store, so you don’t have to waste money on ammo or arrange for the intricacies of a one-handed get away.

Thanks, NRA.

 

Poisoned Kids: I blame ALEC

January 25, 2016 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

by Primo Encarnación

What the hell happened in Flint?

Water that was warned to be unsuitable for human consumption predictably corroded aged lead pipes, causing dangerous levels of lead to be ingested by some people in Flint, MI. The water may have also carried legionella, the bacteria that causes legionnaire’s disease, and may have been responsible for at least one death. That’s the basic facts. Everything beyond that is not nearly so cut and dried.

Contrary to popular belief, there is a long, long list of people who knew and did nothing, who knew and should have done more, who didn’t know but should have or who just plain didn’t want to know. Chief among the culprits is Governor Rick Snyder, whose maladministration of the state of Michigan includes the incredibly unAmerican coups of the democratically elected governments of cities like Flint and Detroit – whose bankruptcies endangered “innocent” creditors – in favor of personally appointed “emergency” managers. The chain of events that led directly to poisoned children began during this period when their parents were disfranchised.

But the chain of events that led to this chain of events stretches much further back into history the GOP would prefer remain murky. The Michigan DEQ (Department of Environmental Quality – so-named without a shred of irony) was implemented back in the 90s under Republican Governor John Engler, as a carve-out of power from the Department of Natural Resources (DNR). Via a series of executive orders, Engler transferred all responsibility for clean air, water and soil from other bureaucracies in the state and handed it all over to a group of people whose mission was the exploitation – not the protection – of those resources in a way that benefitted business. Inherent in that mission is the continued availability of these resources for business purposes, which is what Republicans mean when they say “conservation.”

Democratic Governor Jennifer Granholm attempted to undo this when she re-combined DEQ and DNR, but as soon as Snyder got in, he ripped them apart again, and reconfigured Michigan government to make it “business friendly” once more. And he named as his director of the DEQ a man whose background is in “economic gardening” which is based on bad economics and has nothing at all to do with gardening. In fact, its tenets read like a how-to manual for raping the people and their land.

And this is the entire raison d’etre behind the last 40 years of GOP “governance.” The American Legislative Exchange Council (ALEC) is a non-profit started to create and promote conservative legislation which would transform states into business-friendly enclaves in defiance of Federal attempts to save humanity, especially the EPA. Legislation like that establishing the DEQ has spread like kudzu among the states infested by the Illiterati.  It PRETENDS like it’s trying to save the environment, but actually does the opposite.

And what young state legislators were early ALEC-acolytes? Many names you’d recognize now: Walker, Kasich, Boehner, Mitch Daniels, and… Michigan Governor John Engler, the true father of the Flint Disaster.

When the director of the state agency tasked with keeping your water safe is actually a business wolf in environmental sheep’s clothing…  When anti-democratic ideologies find human life to be an inconvenience to the liberty of property… When state and local government are unable to meet their basic life-safety functions  due to inane anti-tax policies… When your legislature sends big wet kisses to big donors without regard to the health and welfare of actual voters…

When people in America die because they don’t have clean water…

When government has poisoned children…

You can be sure ALEC has been there.

Next Superhero Movie: Disaster Governor

January 25, 2016 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

And as the GOP slides ungracefully into total nonsense

This week Chris Christie called himself the “Disaster Governor.”

He said that with 17 snowstorms during his tenure, not including Hurricane Irene and Hurricane Sandy, “I am clearly the disaster governor.”

Screen Shot 2016-01-25 at 10.03.03 AMYeah well, in more ways than one.

That got me to thinking ….

Could Christie be the next villain in a new Superhero movie?

Disaster Governor:  He gets his super powers from a botched gastric bypass surgery, which allows him to harness the forces of nature to horribly inconvenience his own state for political purposes.

And he’s issued a Superhero challenge.  He warned the voters of New Hampshire not to vote “out of anger.”

“I’m angry, too. I want to burn Washington down because it’s so ineffective,” Christie said, “but who is going to rebuild it when it’s burned down?”

I dunno.  We really need a Pleasant Happy Day Governor for that job.

Thanks to Bryan for the heads up.

The Kiss of Death

January 25, 2016 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

You know how the universe tries desperately to make things even?  You know, like if it’s hot somewhere, it’s cold somewhere else?  What goes up must come down?

Well, the political balance tilted wildly when Sarah Palin endorsed Donald Trump so to make up for that

Screen Shot 2016-01-25 at 8.49.15 AM

Take that, Sarah Palin!

Look at this and grin …

Perry said he found the senator to be a good listener who respects the Tenth Amendment, “knows what he does not know” and is more conservative than Trump.

And that’s the problem with Rick Perry – he has no clue that he’s a complete certified walloping idiot.  And if Rick Perry knows things that Cruz doesn’t know … well, we’d need to water Cruz twice a week.

I think Perry’s observation came about when Cruz and he spent some time together.

Perry: I am the most manly stud in all of Texas.

Cruz: I did not know that.

Perry: I came up one vote short of being Jesus Hisownself.

Cruz: I did not know that.

Perry: I can add and subtract with 70% accuracy.

Cruz: I did not know that.

Perry: I’m endorsing you because the Bushes don’t like me.

Cruz: Well, that I did know.

Thanks to Brian for the heads up.