When you guys agreed to help with the Matthew 25 project, you gave it the boost it needed to get bigger than all of us combined.

Lookie here.

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Check out the teevee coverage that it got.

Ya did good, my friends, ya did good.

San Angelo, Texas, is in central west Texas, kinda between Abilene and Del Rio.  It’s not the garden spot of Texas so you can kinda understand why your average pipe bomb might provide some entertainment.

Kevin Dykstra, who is 23 years old, was found down at the lake by a 29 year old guy.  Early, early Saturday morning, a guy hears his dogs barking and goes to investigate.  He comes upon Dykstra laying in the pool of blood with a “crushed 12-ounce Keystone Light can and a machete. An exploded bottle was found in the shop near the pond.”

All this led to this headline in the local newspaper:

So there you have it.  Headlines that say to the Rotary Club – scratch this dude off your prospective membership list.

My favorite line?  “An update on Dykstra’s status was not provided with the report. There will be no further investigation into the incident.”

No further investigation because drunk and stoopid is what it is.

Thanks to TexasMiataFrank for the heads up.

Michele Bachmann.  Oh yeah, you need me to say more?

She wants to put the refugee children in labor camps.  No, no, no, I am not kidding.

Labor camps.  Damn, woman.

She even has it all worked out.

And we’d get private sector business leaders to locate to those facilities and give these children low-risk jobs to do. And they’d learn about the American way of life, earn their keep, and everyone wins in the end.”

Yeah, slave labor – the basis for “the American way of life.”  What the hell is a “low risk job” that a seven or eight year old can do?  Huh?  You want those kids assembling transistor radios or something?  Or maybe polishing Marcus’s shoes?

Conservative radio host Jason Lewis asked Bachmann about the camps, and what life might be like for the children sent to them. “Well, we’d of course want these facilities to be ideal, you know, for the children to work and learn. They’d spend half of their day working, and the other half learning what every child should learn, and that’s English, you know, English and American history. And as soon as they learn English with some degree of fluency, they can attend local schools, maybe with a voucher program, or something like that. And then they could work when they aren’t in school.”

So I guess piano lessons are out, huh?  Tell me, Michele, are these kids gonna cook their own meals and do their own laundry, too?  Will they be supervised in some manner or just let their corporate overlords whip them into shape?

Can we deport Michele Bachman.  No, no, no, I’m serious.  Can we?

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

 UPDATE:  I’ve been punked.  Again, dammit.  This is the second time I’ve been punked by a satire story because it’s just too damn hard to tell satire with Republicans.  This story ain’t true.  However, Michele Bachmann is.

David Horsey is a great cartoonist for the Los Angeles Times.  Here’s his offering for today:

But, his website has more to say …

Anyone who has ever wondered what happened to that strange-looking, banjo-playing kid from “Deliverance” should check out Rep. Louie Gohmert. Imagine that kid all grown up and you’ll have the spitting image of the Texas Republican.

Like banjo boy, Gohmert is weirdly mesmerizing. What swamp did he wander out of and how in the world did he get elected to the United States House of Representatives? The scary answer: There are thousands of people just like him in Texas’s 1st Congressional District.

Horsey has plenty more to say about our border situation, too.  He concludes that even if every single one of the 7 and 8 years olds coming across the border are gangsters, they are still less a threat to the republic than Louie and company.

I gotta agree.

Thanks to Craig for the heads up.

Texas Republican Congressfool Kevin Brady’s subcommittee on Health opened his hearing with frightful predictions that the ACA is going to destroy Medicare Advantage plans and old people were gonna die in the streets because of it.

Only problem is that Brady doesn’t know shoot from shineola.  Medicare Advantage has never been stronger.

Republicans repeatedly called Obamacare a raid on Medicare despite the fact that their own experts, who were sitting right in front of them, disagreed. The scene was surreal. Republicans kept discussing how Obamacare is destroying Medicare while ignoring the facts that were being presented to them at their own hearing.

The hearing itself was another waste of time and money as House Republicans continue to try to convince the American people that affordable access to healthcare is a bad thing.

Don’t you hate it when that happens?

Admit it, Fools, Obamacare is successful.

Thanks to Alan for the heads up.

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