Y’all, I Think We Need To Be Worried
Okay, I mentioned Sarah Palin’s odd new speech patterns before and one of you mentioned that it was “a slam poetry thing.” Well, she must be running for poet laureate or some damn thing, because she’s doing it again.
Some sources think she was drunk or on pills, but I’m going with the slam poetry thing.
This sucker is 30 minutes long. Fast forward to about the 4 minute mark and listen for a few minutes. If you listen for the whole time, your brain will fall out. No, really.
See, it’s a thing. It really is. And it’s scary.
Y’all, she’s creeping me out.
She’s letting out her inner Pentecostal poet. Palin isn’t into the full speaking in tongues gig yet, but she’s just a drink or pill away. St00pid has moved on to insane mutterings. Waiting for one of her spokes people to announce that after traumatic dental surgery which caused her drooling speech, she’ll be entering rehab to recover from the drugs used in the surgery.
Like she flew from Texas to Alaska while in labor, we are now to believe she flew into Denver minutes after dental surgery. Yeah. Right. Putting in a bid now on some interesting toxic swamp land, too. Not.
1She’s gone way past word salad.
2I’m thinking this is stoned goulash.
Her little joke about Colorado’s “hills” didn’t seem to resonate with the crowd. (around 4:45 or so.) Flop sweat, is my theory.
3angela, Salad Shooter Sarah unfortunately conflates a word processor with a food processor and most often hits the emulsify button, then shoots the resultant slop out of her mouth.
In a normal family, there would have been an intervention, before she reached her latest crescendo of crazy. Toad may be thinking to save himself the expense of a divorce by stepping aside, while Schemer Snookie drinks/snorts her way to her own demise.
4So Siberian Snooki tokes. Who could have seen than one comin’?
5I listened to minute four, and she’s drunk. Guaranteed.
6Micr, depends on the definition of “tokes.” Doubt Moose Breath Mama gets anywhere near marijuana, which could be as healthy as a green vegetable, which would send her fleeing.
Whatever she ingested, shot, snorted or drank, she has apparently been abusing, since her 2008 rejection or long before then.
Sincerely wish her well, into rehab ASAP and never to grasp a microphone again. I’d trade her for Rob Ford. I would.
Oh Canada? Could we interest you in a trade? We’ll take Rob Ford off your hands, if you’ll reclaim Bieber, Cruz and take Palin to sweeten the deal. Please?
7Sarah Palin: The most trusted name in Rightwing Lunacy.
8When Palin was mostly incoherent during the debate with Biden, her base thought she was wonderful, brilliant, and articulate. I wonder what they’re thinking now. Probably that she’s still making sense, which says more about them than her.
9diet Red Bull. She inhales it,snorts,quaffs it,scarfs it down,imbibes,sucks,takes it by IV,injects,irrigates with it,adsorbs,absorbs and drinks it with a bendy straw.
10If this was what I think it might be, she should be dead some time ago. Seriously. Time to do some sort of a brain scan. Yeah. I know. Could be a total waste of time.
11Palin had a brain scan and it found nothing.
12I’m not sure if she’s drunk or if she is just under the impression that she is as cute as a bug and therefore talks like a toddler trying to explain the plot of a movie.
13Hun, You don’t go into another state, or country for that matter, and ridicule their drug laws or denigrate their mountains. Those comments were insulting at best, asinine, and pathetic.
14I can’t listen to her. I’m going to bed soon and I don’t want nightmares. I’ve already heard a [load] more from her than I ever wanted to hear. Good luck to her in rehab.
15This is the Republican version of standup.
16But wait, there’s more!!!!
http://www.cnn.com/2014/07/28/us/palin-news-channel/index.html?hpt=hp_t2
17Unfortunately, she doesn’t sound drunk to me. She sounds like someone in desperate need of a speech writer and fact checker. She’s that conservative friend you debated with that would change the subject every time they lost an argument. This case is particularly sad because it’s almost like she’s arguing with herself in her mind. You throw out one crazy thought and see it through then you’re certifiable. If you introduce 20 or 30 crazy thoughts and bail then they love you. If she weren’t so demented I’d almost want to give her a hug. She’s desperately trying to hold on to relevance and it’s slipping away.
18Sarah Palin news channel? Talk about an oxymoron.
19I’d pay her fee if she promised to never speak again.
there’s more! A London paper reported that Bristol will be a contributor!
20Now this song is stuck in my head!
One toke over the line sweet Jesus
One toke over the line
Sittin’ downtown in a railway station
One toke over the line
(It may not be from toking, but she definitely is over the line.)
21I haven’t had a chance to watch Palin’s speech, so I can’t comment on her lucidity (or lack of it), but here is an article from Talking Points Memo today about her new online video channel. It includes a short video promo:
TPM: Palin skirts the “media filters” with launch of her digital video channel (VIDEO)
22http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/sarah-palin-launches-online-channel
Nope no way am I watching the quitter. It’s not just that I don’t want my brain to fall out it’s so I don’t Frisbee my laptop listening to such stupidity.
23Once Sarah’s Grifting “show” goes online, I hope someone hacks it & send subliminal messages out to her fans. Maybe they can be convinced to seek therapy or convert to the Dem Party.
24The nation’s two-legged brain juicer, Palin, thanks to a shiny twinkly gift from the comedic goddesses…announced she’s producing a “news show”
http://variety.com/2014/digital/news/sarah-palin-launches-online-video-channel-1201269982/
For only $9.95/month, you too can juice your brain in your own homes.
25Betty Bowers, America’s Best Christian, is elated about Palin’s *news* channel
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghCYNqz70Lk
26Wally’s absolutely right: The best thing we can do about Sarah the Stupid is to ignore her. She isn’t currently in any danger of occupying any political office that would impose her unfortunate inability to think on the rest of us. So let’s just ignore her. Besides, it will really get her goat to not having anyone hanging on every unfortunate word, doncha think?
27This is one reason I read the news instead of watching it. Watching the news for me means I get all hung up on the background and the potted plants etc and don’t hear the message. I betcha lots of Palin worshipers are made that same way. They just watch to see her hairstyle and her lipstick color.
28Nightly Line-up:
“Rebel Without a Clue” – hosted by Sarah Palin
“Huck Dynasty” starring Mike Huckabee
“CON-servative” panel show of GOPers with courtroom woes
“Keeping Up With The Cash-dashians” a comic romp through the days of Baine, starring Mitt Romney
“Property Brothers” sitcom starring the Koch brothers and a rotating cast of GOP politicians
“Criminal Minds” starring Ollie North and Jack Abramoff
“Orange is the New Black” starring John Boehner (tell me you didn’t see *that* one coming!)
“The Walking Dead” starring John McCain
“Sons of Anarchy” hosted by Ron and Rand Paul
(local programming) “Katy Perry” the laugh-a-minute look at Rick Perry’s new home just outside Houston.
29Commenter on this at another site:
30Mattel’s new Half-In-The-Bag Barbie.
AlanInAustin, you nailed the salad bar Barbie. But, ““Orange is the New Black” starring John Boehner (tell me you didn’t see *that* one coming!)”
That is worth the price of a new keyboard. That’s one of my favorite all-time President Obama humor moments. That, and “You have a drink with Mitch McConnell,” to suggestions the President socialize more with Congress and have a drink with Mitch.
31What’s y’all’s views on Boehner trying to sue the President? other than it being weirder than three redistrictings in one decade.
32Poetry slam indeed…here’s the classic Palin Farewell Speech, as read by William Shatner with bass and bongo backup.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=mF_t1A8LGzg
33And now for just $9.95 per month or, $99.95 per year, you can subscribe to her new internet TV network. She’s a grifter.
34When she landed at the airport did she have to get a permit for her flying monkies or was that included with the broom permit?
35It’s like watching a trainwreck. It’s sickening, you don’t want to see it, but you can’t help a horrified look of disbelief.
36I think that’s her attempt at preacher cadence. Kinda pathetic, ain’t it?
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