Yachting Randy Neugebauer Goes All Don Ho

March 10, 2013 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Several years ago, I told you about West Texas Congressleech Randy Neugebauer buying a big ole honker yacht .

Randy claimed that he needed the yacht to help himself campaign, which might be plausible if there was even a ditch with water in it anywhere near his home in Abilene, Texas.  If you had a yacht in Lubbock or Abilene it would stay in perpetual dry-dock.  West Texas is dry, my friend.  They only got 1/4 inch of rain during Noah’s flood.  The catfish have fleas.

So Randy doesn’t keep his fancy pants yacht in his district where he’s convincing folks he’s just a man of the people.  He keeps it in Washington, DeeCee, where there’s more hookers.

Now, I’m gonna stop here and tell you something.  God gave Randy a pointy head.  I’m serious.  His head comes to a little pointy thing, reminding me of a Dairy Queen ice cream cone.  That doesn’t have much to do with this story, but I thought you should know why he stays off camera as much as possible.  Well, that, and he drools.  Okay, he really doesn’t drool.  I just made that up.  But, it’s flat amazing that he doesn’t.

Anyway, Randy is getting himself so damn much money being a congressdandy that he needs to defer some of his taxes.  So, he bought municipal bonds.  In Hawaii.  Here’s a PDF showing his $250,000 Maui Wowie municipal bonds.

Now, I do not know how often Randy has to go visit his bonds, but I’m betting that his campaign pays for it.

I think Randy could make some big bucks if he could market his solution to how a man dumber than a sack of hammers doesn’t drool.   Heck, he could have a jet in Paris France with that much money.

Thanks to Alfredo over at the Dairy Queen for some good Neugebauer snickerin’.

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