Ted Cruz is prancing around American playing Joan of Arc. That boy is just two nails and a hammer away from having himself arranged nicely on a cross to be toted around the country and idolized.

Ted claims there is a war on faith.  Explain to me why rightwing Christians think they have to be persecuted or rich. It’s either prosperity gospel or martyr gospel.  There’s no in between. I do not know what happened to I Come to The Garden Alone gospel, but I sure do miss it.  I liked it when Sweet Jesus was a comfort, not a personal weapon.

Anyway.

“The persecution of religious liberty ends today,” Cruz said to cheering crowds from the altar of a church in Chattanooga, Tenn., an outdoor stage in Little Rock and the flatbed of a pickup truck in Tupelo, Miss.

Here in Des Moines, the rally featured a performance by the Christian rock band the Newsboys. Attendees could pick up free American flags, coloring books titled “We “C” Ted Cruz for President” and a Ted Cruz pocket Constitution. A ministry handed out black rubber bracelets.

What?  No Jesus Koozies?

Ted has reduced Jesus to his essence and poured him into a snake oil bottle that he’s peddling around the country.  There will be lightning strikes, I can almost guarantee you that.

My favorite Tedism is this one —

“You want to know what this election is about?” Cruz asked. “We’re one justice away from the Supreme Court saying every image of God shall be torn down.”

Uh, Ted, I think Moses already took care of that.

Thanks to David for the heads up.