When Holy Crap and Fun With Guns Meet
In all seriousness, Rocky Mount United Methodist Church in Jemison, Aladamnbama, has gone into the firearm ministry.
They have opened a gun range in what used to be a gully overrun with kudzu.
“This is an opportunity for us to reach out in the name of Jesus Christ in a setting that is completely unique. Even odd by some people’s standards. But who’s to say that church can’t happen right here,” Guin said, pointing at the red clay dirt of the range.
In the name of Jesus Christ, I shoot you? Or maybe shotgun baptism?
Thanks to Mike for the heads up.
Doubtless the home of some very nice shotgun weddings as well.
1Might make for shorter sermons… the preacher will not be tempted to go shootin’ his mouth off. Somebody just might do it for him.
2Truly baptism by fire.
Odd to think that the kudzu was an improvement.
3No knowledge of history, theology, or even common sense.
4The United Methodist Church Book of Resolutions, on their official website, states the following:
“Whereas, in keeping with the spirit of Isaiah 2:4: “God will judge between the nations, and settle disputes of mighty nations. Then they will beat their swords into iron plows, and their spears into pruning tools. Nation will not take up sword against nation; they will no longer learn how to make war”;
Whereas, reflecting the church’s traditional role as a place of safety and sanctuary,
Therefore, every United Methodist church is officially declared a weapon-free zone.”
Not clear whether there are any penalties for showing up in church arms, or for ministers who set up a firing range at the church. (Curiously, performing a same-sex marriage is a firing offense, if I may use that turn of phrase semi-ironically.)
5What happened to Thou Shall not Kill?
6@Corinne: those commandment thingys only apply to the other guys….
7That is the best business plan I’ve ever heard, Jesus would certainly approve. Just think of the possibilities to make so much money: a daycare center and gun range, senior or community center and gun range, gas station and gun range, medical center and gun range, fast food franchise and gun range, pet store and gun range, even a farmer’s market and gun range or an arts & craft fair with a gun range. What a great way to get the community involved. I’m surprised new housing developments don’t include a gun range alongside their pool and club house.
8The best comment on the article:
9“Jesus wept.”
Yep.
This surprises me, because I always thought the Methodists were more or less rational.
10Old Mayfly, I am sorry to inform you that no one who believes in a magical sky god is in any way “more or less rational.”
11There are actually two groups of Methodists. I think both of them have a thing called a synod. This is a collegial meeting of members of the synod who take a look at situations relating to the church. I want to be a fly on the wall at the synod that finally sees what is happening at Rocky Mount United Methodist. They could even expel that particular member from their union. My late uncle was a Methodist Sunday School supervisor for 40 years. He had a lot of pull in the church. Rocky Mount wouldn’t have last 5 minutes with him and his brethren.
12http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/6e/f2/89/6ef28925e7e01615fec2769ce13145ba.jpg
They should just eliminate Jesus and go straight for what they really worship.
13Jesus didn’t say anything about guns, but he said this about the equivalent of his time:
Matthew 21:52. “Then said Jesus unto him, Put up again thy sword into his place; for all they that take the sword shall perish with the sword.” (Similar in John 18:11.)
Cheryl, thanks for the link. I miss Tony Auth….
14I was raised Methodist. Always seemed calm rational people.
This is neither.
Still waiting for the OT God to come down and smite some folks.
15Thank you Laurel. As a sane Methodist I am totally disgusted with this particular “congregation” of loonies! In NO WAY do they represent the spirit of todays Methodist church. We, my congregation, spend most of our energy’s working to alleviate the desperate situations of our city’s working poor! This is just appalling!
16“…odd by some people’s standards.”
Sweet buttery Cheezus – ‘ya think????
17I have been a Methodist only a little bit longer than I have shot firearms. This disgusts me. Even in the old days when I carried every day I never carried at church.
@Laurel
18Thanks for the quote. My youngest daughter is a Perkins student. She sent me the Book of Resolutions reference but didn’t include the full quote.
I’m pretty sure that Jesus is not the only one who wept over this travesty.
19Maggie,
Synod is a Lutheran thing and not at all Methodist, which evolved out of the Church of England.
I’m a sane Methodist like Jerry, and find this appalling.
20Jesus wants his church to be prepared for Armageddon.
If some of his flock facilitate the coming of Armageddon, that’s even better. (What would Jesus say if he read this article?
21I assume, “Jesus Christ!!”
Maybe they should go to full immersion like the Baptist, and just hold them under a little longer.
22There is nothing in the Bible about guns ’cause Jesus didn’t invent them till much later.
23There’s only one explanation..aliens have come down and infected preachers of all sorts with brain disease. What else could it be. Helps them “reach out”. Wonder what they’ll catch with all that reacing out?
24Nothing says love like Jesus, a little kid and a gun!
http://media.photobucket.com/user/landoking/media/jesusgun.jpg.html?filters%5Bterm%5D=jesus%20gun&filters%5Bprimary%5D=images&filters%5Bsecondary%5D=videos&sort=1&o=19
25As a Lutheran I can tell you that we name our geographic divisions synods and each one has a bishop. The United Methodist Church, (That’s the big one.) has conferences headed by presidents.
There are dozens of different denominations of Lutherans, (Mine is the ELCA, the big one.), Methodists, Baptists, Catholics and others. (There are Roman Catholics, United Catholics, Evangelical Catholics, American Catholics, etc., but the Vatican likes to pretend like they’re the only ones so they don’t acknowledge the others.)
PS. I’m an ELCA rev. We’re the one that ordains those gay people! Oh my!
26Fred F –
Oy.
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