We’re Number Last

February 21, 2011 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

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Texas sucks, but what the hell doesn’t now days?

Juanita is suspecting that we’re gonna have to start calling Texas The Used-To-Be-Great State.

The Legislative Study Group has pretty much decided that Rick perry is delusional.  “In his early life he was a cheerleader for the Aggies.  It appears that he never got over it,” Juanita says.  “He’s still cheering when we’re down to the two minute warning and are 8 runs behind while we have no idea where the puck is and our three pointer fouled out ten minutes ago.”

It’s not good.

Texas has the highest percentage of adults and children without health insurance and ranks fourth in the percentage of children living in poverty. Texas has the lowest percentage of pregnant women receiving prenatal care in their first trimester. We spend less for mental health services per capita than any other state, and we’re next to last in Medicaid coverage of the poor and per capita Medicaid expenditures.

Our schools may be packed with students, but they are not producing the well-educated young workers the state needs. We are in the bottom 10 in state and local expenditures per public school pupil, while the high school graduation rate ranks 43rd. The percentage of Texans 25 and older with a high school diploma or higher is the lowest in the nation.

Texas racks up an unenviable string of No. 1s on environmental issues. It is tops in the nation in emissions of carbon dioxide, releases of carcinogenic pollutants into the air, toxic chemicals released into water and hazardous waste generated. At the same time, Texans are fifth in per capita consumption of energy.

Now, do you want to hear the bad news?

We don’t have any money.  The Republicans spent it all.  Every dime.  And then they spent the federal stimulus money to cover-up their previous spending.

But our Governor has a $100,000,000 slush fund so he can give a million dollars to each of his 100 closest friends.

Juanita is considering asking Rick Perry to the VFW dance next week.  She did the math and she’s way behind on her allotment of Gubernatorial graft.   “I suspect I need to bring that to the attention of the proper authorities,” she says.

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