Well Hell, Let’s Just Run the Damn Duck
Republican Presidential candidate Bobby Jindal (you’re cringing, aren’t you?) announced this week thinks that Willie Robertson of Duck Dynasty is his man. “He’s a great guy, I think he’d be a great running mate,” Jindal said.
Well, it would not be the prettiest ticket ever but what they lack in intelligence they make up for in goofy grins.
What neither Bobby or Willie recognize is that not everybody ends their public prayers with “YaHoo! Big Guy In The Sky!”
And everybody knows that the only Willie fit for a national ticket is Nelson.
Hell, we’d get pot legalized yesterday.
Thanks to AlanInAustin for the heads up.
For better or worse, Bobby Jindal is NEVER going to have to decide who his running mate for the Presidency is. Ever.
As much as Democrats might be drooling over the prospect of running against a Jindal/Robertson ticket…
1What do Duck Dynasty and Dick Cheney have in common? Fostering an urge by us sane folks to arm the ducks.
2Isn’t that the same Duck guy who said something so… was it stupid or bigoted?… that people who had been touting him backed away? I can’t keep track of the stupid and/or bigoted things that RWNJs say, but it made the papers for a day or two.
3I really long for the bad old days when the GOP was not shooting for “most moronic person, but charasmatic, ever” for their ticket and leadership.
We’ve just seen some real extremes of low IQ or non-functioning IQ being spokespeople for the GOP–Palin, Bachman, Nugent… It’s plum awful!
4Never mind the pot, I’d campaign for Willie Nelson.
5Honest to god, I’ve never seen so many people so tragically out of touch with reality to think that they have the ghost of a chance of ever being elected President. Jindal should sit down, shut up and get a real job.
No Democrats are going to vote for him because he’s an idiot. No Republicans are going to vote for him because his name is Piyush. He can’t out-Christian Huckabee. He can’t out-evil-governor Walker. He can’t out-populist Cruz. He can’t out-GOP-mainstream Bush. He can’t out-raise anyone.
Take a vacation, Bobby. Grow a beard and some gravitas. Take over as president of some small university that no one cares if it fails. Look at the moon and think about green government cheese. Tape the Presidential Seal to the middle of a mirror and give pretend State of the Union addresses. Upload them to YouTube. Send anonymous packages of Pampers to David Vitter’s office.
For god’s sake, son, you’re done, just chill.
6For those of you who haven’t seen this yet, go to you tube and search for “card tricks with Willie”.
Yes, I know it has nothing to do with Bobby Jindal, but it’s a lot more interesting than he could ever be.
7And after the photogs go, the Robertson family takes off their hair & beards, change into chinos & polo shirts and go home to have cocktails on the patio overlooking their country club. They are one of the bigger non corporate, non religious scams going.
8@daChipster: +1!
9Willie Nelson is at least entertaining.
10I’d say daChipster by about +10 or more!
I just SMH at all of these idiots!!
11Wingnuts forever confuse charisma and prescence with christmas presents. And we know who get wingnut christmas presents year round.
12daChipster just ejaculated more passion in three paragraphs and one sentence than wingnuts have in three centuries in ‘murrica. daChipster for flying spaghetti monster.
13daChipster sure pegged Jindal! Hope a copy was forwarded to Piyush for his edification. Republicans, people for whom edification and mortify are interchangeable terms.
Google “Mortification of Spin” – think you’ll have a chuckle with that, daChipster.
14On second thought, Donald for Pres, Daisy for VP, Huey, Louie and Dewey for Cabinet posts. The other members of Donald’s family can fill in the rest.
15Fortunately, the POTUS and VP can’t be from the same state, and I doubt Robertson wants to “move” to Wyoming.
16daChipster never disappoints!
17them duck people would be a good reason for me to start shooting a gun..
18Let’s Arm Ducks! (Thanks for the snort/laugh PKM. That was great.)
daChipster for President! (Who is your VP choice?)
19Just what we need in the White House: Piyush Jindal and Willie Robertson. Dumb & Dumber.
20Speechless. This man was a Rhodes scholar. The other ones?
21Phony mountain men: only Rhodes they know are dusty, remote roads. Where I wish they all were.
I like the idea of Willie for VP. Esp since to be VP is akin to being in a Witness Protection Program. But Kinky Friedman is my candidate for POTUS. And because Willie is in such a State I think the 12th Amendment is satisfied where ever Willie actually resides.
22Debbo, I cannot support “daChipster for President!” We men have had our chance at running the country. It’s time for a woman President. I nominate Miss Juanita Jean. daChipster would make an ideal campaign manager and speech writer for her, then could serve as an excellent VP choice. Love the idea of them filling cabinet and court appointments with great selections from The World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc. Bubba Sr would be an excellent choice to replace John Roberts, Marge Wood should be Press Secretary in the White House Office of Communications, while Micr is the obvious choice for US Attorney General. e platypus onion for Secretary of State!
Ladies of The World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc. come forward to serve your nation as members of the cabinet and court. I’ll be down at Camp David organizing a game of b-ball with President Obama.
23OUCH!!!***!**#^!
Seems I failed to nominate my beautiful wife for Secretary of Defense.
24You know, if a prominent liberal were using the U.S. flag as a sweatband—the way Willie Robertson does, every damn day—the right-wing media machine would be collectively frothing at the mouth over it, demanding that the flag be shown proper respect. And there’s Willie, sopping his brow with Old Glory, in every picture you see of him.
That being said, I think “Bobby” Jindal and Willie Robertson are a perfect match. They deserve one another….
25SteveTheReturned, say it isn’t so: “That being said, I think “Bobby” Jindal and Willie Robertson are a perfect match. They deserve one another….”
Please no, not another pair of ultra conservatives clowns coming out of the closet and getting married, no less.
26“Hell, we’d get pot legalized yesterday.” Something tells me he’d also do something about the IRS system. We all know it needs a serious overhaul, but most of us did not get run over by it like he did.
27@SteveTheReturned
28That’s the only sweatband the costume store had with THAT much hair included. Of course there were many Gallagher flat caps with a ton of ginger hair attached!
It wasn’t all that long ago I was down in Louisiana and over a good dinner and libation folks are very apt to talk about anything. It came to pass that not a one of them voted for Jindal and did not know anyone who did. After fighting off yet another headache I came to the conclusion that Jindal’s governorship was some kind of political immaculate conception. ‘Course I did not say anything of the sort in front of them.
Long story short, if Jindal runs again for anything and has to depend on votes from anyone in Louisiana . . .
29A big hats off to all of you for one of the best reads I have ever had in a long time. As long as the Tea Party keeps trotting out the crazies I know I will retain my persepctive just being here.
30You can’t get off that easy, PKM. You’d have to be political director in the campaign and could you be tempted to become Director of Central Intelligence?
I don’t need anything so lofty: just NASA director… and a budget. A big, FAT budget.
31daChipster, that doesn’t seem like a healthy career progression for me; from shooting hoops with President Obama to being shot at by the CIA, or being shot by Miss Juanita Jean herownself. She’s apt to take dead aim at someone more gaffe prone than Joe Biden.
About that “big, FAT budget” …. that should be the case for all science and humanity related programs. Maybe I should be the numbers guy. I could patch enough loopholes to forgive all student debt and find a few trillion dollars in off shore accounts to support a progressive agenda. Can I have Anonymous on my team?
32All right. I’m in for the slate of candidates described by PKM and daChip. Can I be the Secretary of Commerce? I’d love to take a giant axe and lop off subsidies tax breaks for big oil, big bidness, the 1% and many other crooks.
Or, I know! I know! Chief Justice of the Supreme Court! Citizens United bites the dust! No damn fake religious exemptions for anyone! Equal rights for every damn citizen! Gerrymandering becomes a crime punishable by 25 years in prison. Legalize the sweet herb! Oops. Willie already did that.
When she retires, on her terms and in her own sweet time, the Notorious RBG will become the Patron Saint of Justice and the mottos in all courtrooms will be changed to “Where The Notorious RBG Leads, Justice Follows.”
Juanita Jean, can I please be Chief Justice? Pretty please? With sugar on top?
33