Tucker Carlson: American Pimp

March 08, 2023 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

After close inspection and deep intellectual thought, I have decided that Tucker Carlson’s play-acting adoration of TFG is probably pretty much the same way hookers talk about their pimp when he ain’t around.

The Washington Post has it.

Two days before Jan. 6, Carlson texted someone, “We are very, very close to being able to ignore Trump most nights. I truly can’t wait.”

He added, “I hate him passionately,” and then, of Trump’s four years in office: “We’re all pretending we’ve got a lot to show for it, because admitting what a disaster it’s been is too tough to digest. But come on. There really isn’t an upside to Trump.”

But there’s more. Oh yeah.

Hey, I gotta admit that it’s hard for me to think of Tucker Carlson and the word passionately in the same thought balloon.  That right there is just a shiver looking for a spine to run up.

But it wasn’t just Trump they hated. Hell Honey, they hated each other.  The whole place is just a bubbling caldron of blonde hair bleach, bought souls, and Tucker’s smoldering underwear.

If you’ve got a bit of voyeur in you, here’s a real, actual text message I got sent by my undercover agent. Click on it to enlarge it, or however your computer machine makes it bigger.

I could stay up all night reading this stuff.  I’d have to order highlighters by the carton, but it would be worth it.

Y’all, there’s more coming. I just know it.

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0 Comments to “Tucker Carlson: American Pimp”


  1. BarbinDC says:

    Oh, this is just too much fun! And, I have never watched Faux Noise.

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  2. Sorry, but the minions of Hell are not quite ready to pull them down into the abyss just yet. No doubt they want to see some more agonzied writhing.

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  3. Buttermilk Sky says:

    I can’t wait to read Trump’s clever nicknames for Tuckums. (“Sucker Carlson”? “RINO Marxist Communist Carlson”?) These are exciting times.

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  4. And yet he keeps spewing the lies. He has no shame. I almost typed that as sham, but we know he has plenty of that.

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  5. Hahaha, tRump ‘destroys everything he touches’, even the treacherous Fox ‘Hate’ News!

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  6. Steve from Beaverton says:

    This is further evidence against F “news” in the lawsuit against them, and supports what good ol boy Rupert has (reluctantly) testified to. They knowingly lied to further the narrative of a fraudulent election for ratings and money. Hope this sinks their boat including tucker and his comrades.

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  7. Harry Eagar says:

    Carlson has bad luck. Just on the day he wanted the country talking about his Jan 6 expose, instead we’re all laughing at his emails.

    That said, the Fox emails reveal a much deeper self-awareness than I would ever have suspected. The amount of self-absorption is about as expected.

    I never worked in the teevees, but I did work for a big, important newspaper. That was before emails, but I guarantee that if you revealed the emails of that paper it would not be anything like Fox’s.

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  8. slipstream says:

    This is the first time — and probably the last — that slipstream agrees with Carlson.

    I too look forward to the day when we can ignore Trump.

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  9. Katherine says:

    I think Tuckums should have to spend the rest of his life listening to nonstop Trump yammering.

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  10. As long as dumpy is in the spotlight, he does not care about anything else .

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