They Just Gotta Shoot at Somthin’
We’ve got a lot of problems in this country. Thank God we have a big supply of Republicans willing to fix them.
Last week, Oklahoma State Representative Justin Humphrey filed HB1648 which seeks to establish a Big Foot hunting season. You can read the entire bill right here.
Pictured here is Justin Humphrey, a worthy-looking advisory for Big Foot.
I was wondering why just a season, but Thelma speculated that you wouldn’t want to hunt during mating season because in Oklahoma, the opening day of Big Foot mating season draws a damn big crowd.
Thanks to Rick for the heads up.
They’re special in Oklahoma…
1Manbearpig was apparently taken.
2Watch this fool loudly proclaim his opposition to DC Statehood.
3Saaay, Justin. I couldn’t help but notice that yer lookin’ kinda fuzzy.
4Wanna go campin’?
What? No bag limit? No bow season?
5Heck, that’s nothing.
Here in Alaska every year we have a special season for brown bear. You folks in the little states call them “grizzly bears” but you don’t got ’em in your backyard. We do. We call ’em browns.
The good news: anybody can get a tag.
The bad news: it’s catch and release.
6Thank goodness it’s an Oklahoman doing this – we don’t need any more crazies from Texas!
7I want Michigan to have open season on any and all TRUMP signs, flags, even MAGA hats. I want to shoot them full of holes, especially the ones still around my neighborhood. They scare my wife.
8I suppose after Republicans followed Tinyhands Trump around for four or five years, the pursuit of Bigfoot while holding a gun seems like a reasonable progression for the party faithful.
9No thanks, I’ll pass. I’m saving my ammo for Yeti season. Uhh… Oklahoma has a Yeti season, right?
10It’s moot. Everyone knows Bigfoot lives in the UP of Michigan.
11A number of years back, someone wanted to hunt Bigfoot in Oregon. The local sheriff stopped it, saying that although there was no such thing as Bigfoot, a number of the county’s residents were large and hairy- and he didn’t want accidents.
12RepubAnon @ #11
And what if the guys from Duck Dynasty or ZZ Top pass through town? A case of mistaken identity for out of town celebrities could prove equally dangerous.
“Tragic news from State Fair officials today. Members of ZZ Top had legs, they knew how to use them, but not fast enough. Details at ten.”
13Rick@ 12 is nominated in the category of best adapted lyrics!
14Just where in Oklahoma would a Bigfoot be able to hide without being spotted miles away.
15I guess focus on opportunity for a hunting season means OK already has its preparations for the zombie apocalypse well in hand.
16Mike @ 14:
17Fencelines. Birds land, crap seeds, repeat.
Intersections of fencelines especially.
Sneakin up on em’s the tricky part.
I’m waiting for the DC BigButt season opening in a couple of weeks, henchmen included in the hunt. Although a Palm Beach/Mar-a-Pendejo BigButt season would work too…no bag limits.
18Why would anyone want to kill Bigfoot?
19Weird. This guy actually wants to hunt and most likely kill something that is smarter than he is!
20That must be what my damn fool neighbor is doing in his back yard every weekend, hunting for big foot.
21slipstream, do the tags go to the people or the bears?
22That legislatin’ guy better be careful. Hunters might end up reducing the number of reliable Good Ol’ Clown voters. Exhibit one:
https://conandaily.com/2021/01/21/william-mccall-calhoun-jr-biography-13-things-about-us-capitol-rioter-from-americus-georgia/
if that fellow’s NRA cap fell off while he’s out in the weeds, he’d be hard to distinguish from a genuine Big Foot.
23Hmmm. It does not tell whether he really did carry a tomahawk.
Another insurance lawyer. What’s up with that?
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