The Esteemed State Board of Education in Texas
There is not an educated person in Texas who does not cringe at the mention of the Texas State Board of Education. It has become a nest ‘o nuts.
But, maybe, just maybe, the best is yet to come.
Before I start, I’ll tell you a true, honest to goodness story. About 15 years ago I interviewed a Christian Coalition rightwing guy who was running for school board. He proudly announced that there are 17,000 functionate illiterates in our district. I could not help myself. I couldn’t. I looked at him and said, “better make that 17,001.” Needless to say, it was lost on him.
There is woman named Lady Theresa Thombs running for a seat on the State Board of Education. She lives dangerously close to Fort Worth. She is running against one of the finest board members we’ve ever had.
She is a Tea Party member. On her twitter page, she describes herself as “an international evangelist” and real estate agent. However, on her website, she describes herself as “an international child advocate.” Apparently, she has been to Mexico over spring break.
And there’s her website, which has been largely scrubbed.
Thombs’ website made its debut last week.
She wrote that she’s running to fight — her spellings — “adgendas and ideoligies.”
That was right after the part about teaching the basics.
Parents are “criticle,” she wrote, and she’s an “advicate” and “expereinced.”
She summed up her “Mission and Issues” as to “stem the tide of our best and brightest teachers leaving the classroom to pursue other carriers, because they can no longer live with the policies and mandates they no are harmful to their students.”
(Some but not all of the spelling problems have been corrected.)
Her website also said that she was named Dame of Justice by the Sovereign Order of the Knights of Justice, which is kinda a coincidence because they named me Dame of Aqua Net. But, she took down that link. Maybe she sobered up. However, I kinda doubt that because her logo still looks like it says BS for Kids.
It does. Seriously, it does.
I know y’all think we have all the fun in Texas.
We do.
.
.
.
Thanks to Kyle for the heads up.
Now THAT is depressing. Well, maybe she just likes to run for office. I noticed that she also tried to run for the Texas Legislature, promising that she’d get a term limits bill “push(ed) through to the Legislature floor” within 24 hrs. Or something. You know, hanging around home with nobody to boss around makes you itch. Her kids are all in school, looks like. I know that’s when I went back to work. It never occurred to me to run for the Legislature, though. I never in my wildest dreams would want to be on the SBOE. They get into big fights there.
1If she wins I’m emigrating to Scotland.
2Big problem: the functional illitirites won’t no that all those words are mispelled (which is, by the way, one of the most misspelled words in English).
Does she have any chance of winning?
She’s a joke, right? When she is interviewed on TV there will be a lot of blood spatter as she shoots herself in the foot or someplace else a lot more interesting. I would bet 10 to 1 that when she is taken to task for her HORRIBLE spelling she will resort to poor little me at the mercy of the librul elleet! Just a thought. With her horrendous spelling, did she make all those mis-spelled signs the Pea Tardiers carry at their rallies?
3She also seems to have problems composing an actual sentence. I wonder if she’ll find lots of “voluteers” for her cause.
4The amazing thing about these teabaggers is that they are PROUD of their willful ignorance.
5oh heck, that’s my district. 🙁
6If we would just institute a simple spelling test for important jobs like policy makers, representatives of the masses and folks who run for office, we’d be a whole lot better off. Those that have the potential to do the most damage would never make the cut.
Just a suggestion.
7Now then, all you nay-sayers! Lady T – First Lady of Phonics –
8has discovered the spell check function her computer was blessed by God with. Amen! Her website has the most delightful spectrum of white children ever assembled in a 21st Century campaign effort. It was thus a jarring note to read that she
wanted to work to stem the flood of teachers leaving the profession to go to other “carriers.” Airlines? Disease bearers?
Pigeons? Well, she will doubtless succeed in any endeavor.
SECDEE!
9I passed this on to a site in South Dakota. They are soliciting input from readers as to whether a candidate that has four (sics) in one post should be disqualified from holding public office. Looks like Texas would win this one hands down.
10Marge S- didn’t you mean she would dowt less suck seed in any Andover? Hi Zyx. 🙂
11Ladies and Gentlemen:
12For those of you with too much time on your hands may I respectfully suggest you take a look at the website that was
so helpfully provided above of the Sovereign Order of the Knights of Justice. Is it a coincidence that the acronym for said organization SOKJu is pronounced “Sock a Jew?” More importantly, did Lady T remove reference to this venerable and ancient group because it is, shall we say, a river that grew from many Catholic streams? Fortunately, it refers to itself in recent history as a Christian Militia but . . . hmmmm?? Lets just say they have not discovered their spell and grammar check functions either so she is in good company. Okay, I better get busy with real life.
Well, Stephanie, looks like you have your work cut out for you. ANYONE who runs has a chance of getting elected. I mean, look at Cruz.
13I looked up one of the pictures on her website (because you damn well know it’s a stock photo of some kid who’s never been within a thousand miles of Texas) and (surprise!) the first link I found was for a canned, $59 pre-made template designed for elementary schools. Seriously:
http://templates.entheosweb.com/template_number/41150.asp
Which all kinda fits, you know, with the third-grade spelling. Don’t say she’s not consistent.
14Now, people, let’s not descend to their level. Criticize her ideas, but no more of these ad homonym* attacks, please.
*ad homonym: attacking the grammar, not the argument
15of course, that was just a joke (as is this candidate). Anyone running for the State Board of Education should at least know how to find an editor, if not actually spell.
16Small Comment:
Dana Carvey……
The Church Lady….
Was based on Theresa Thombs.
17the pictures on her website are all little Anglo kids. I guess since they are now the minority in Texas schools, she can proclaim herself the “minority candidate.”
18Does she call herself Lady to indicate royalty?
19(doesn’t usually go over well here) If not, it is an unusual first name, like Major Major Major in Heller’s Catch 22. Spelling mistakes aside, her background in “international evangelism” does not bode well for the more factual and scientific educational interests.
So did you hear about the lady judge who, when told about women having to drive 150 miles to get to a Texas abortion
20clinic answered ‘Well they will just have to drive faster”
I would say she is amongst the functional illiterate elite of Texas. She’s the Lady of the group … yeah, sure, you betcha!!
21JJ, there are plenty of people outside of Texas for whom the words “Texas Board of Education” causes a reflexive “Please, no, what now?” flinch.
Can we please disqualify from running for any board of education those people who have obviously not been educated– for whom their entire schooling experience, if any, was just water off a duck’s back?
“Some people drink from the fountain of knowledge, but you just swish and spit, bless your heart….”
22I’m glad she could spell ‘basics’ but doesn’t have any.
23She may have finally run a speelirchek over it but the grammar, capitalization and punctuation? Sweet baby Jeebus, save me. First sentences from Mission and Issues:
“My Mission as a State Board of Education member is to be a pivotal, conservative, vote. Something our incumbent in District 11 has failed to do. To make sure that curriculums like Common Core and CSCOPE are not taught in Texas Schools. These curriculums have been banned by Governors of 9 different states and with good reason.”
That’s just the beginning. The rest of The Page Where English Goes to Die is here:
http://ladythombs4txkids.org/mission-and-issues.html
24I had experience with C-SCOPE. Hated it. Locked teachers into the clock, rather than the students.
25She went on: “We know we didn’t come from monkeys!”
http://littlegreenfootballs.com/article/42956_Texas_GOP_Education_Board_Candidate-_We_Know_We_Didnt_Come_From_Monkeys!#rss
The monkeys thank you for not blaming you on them. Have heard from a confidential source that Jesus would like the same consideration.
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