That’s A Plan, Gomer

July 12, 2022 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Okay, Alex Jones is set to go to trial in Austin, Texas, next week.  To tell you the truth, everybody here is sitting on pins and needles waiting to see what stunt he pulls next to stall the process one more damn time.

I think we have our answer. He’s decided to show how much he loves America by cutting off his own appendages. Apparently he’s going for the “I’m insane. Just look at the blood.” defense.

Mr Jones unsheathed a knife and said he wanted to cut off one of his fingers to show how grateful he was to his audience.

“And that’s why when I salute you — I’m not into self-harming, but I just actually want to take this dagger and just cut a finger off right on air to show you how much I appreciate you and what you’ve done,” he said, adding, “Giving up a finger to beat these people is nothing!”

He is not insane. He knows perfectly well what he’s doing. You’ll notice that he’s not giving up his trigger or bullhorn finger.

However, if he really wants to impress everybody, he picked the wrong damn appendage.

 

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0 Comments to “That’s A Plan, Gomer”


  1. You are too funny. Jones is the face of the acronym “POS!” (Sorry for the offensive language) I hope your son drives Jones into bankruptcy so we can see him holding a sign by the side of the road asking for help. I can only speculate about what I would throw his way!

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  2. LizzyMom says:

    Forget appendages — he should cut out his tongue and do us all a big favor!

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  3. Grandma Ada says:

    I’m sure there are some Sandy Hook families that would be happy to sharpen the knife and make sure he doesn’t miss.

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  4. The Surly Professor says:

    dbtexas: I was once asked by a smiling group of Congressional staffers just what I meant by calling a politician a “POS”. My response was “It means piece of scruff. Why, what did you think it meant?” Feel free to use this in case you’re ever in a situation where the usual definition would raise eyebrows but you still want to get the message across.

    LizzyMom: It’d be really hard to cut out your own tongue. Slashing your own throat, however, is comparatively easy. Let’s let the Goofus go for the easier target.

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  5. dbtexas says:

    Thanks Surly Prof! Never too old to learn – and I learn a lot from this site. Some sanity in a crazy world!

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  6. Sandridge says:

    dbtexas @1, If I knew of an upcoming opportunity to “speculate about what I would throw his way”, I’d have to borrow a large dog and a couple of cats to gather the appropriate ‘deposits’ to put in a paper bag for a ‘special delivery’ to ol’ AJ…

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  7. Sandridge says:

    And on the topic of POS Alex Jones, he was a ‘feature’ of today’s January 6 hearing, with a video clip of his fat sorry ass shouting the same numbers ‘1776’ over and over.

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  8. Katherine says:

    Miss JJ, his ex-wife would probably tell us that his other ‘appendage’ if to small to find to cut it off.

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  9. He should do it. I’ve got a fingertips him. Two actually; one on each hand.

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  10. Steve from Beaverton says:

    As Johnny Carson used to say, cut off his slausin. They came close to that during the hearing this morning. I’m sure his rant today on his whatever you call it show was really something.

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  11. Sam in Mellen says:

    Cut off your pecker Alex, then I might be impressed.

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  12. Well, he IS a big man with his beard and `tache …………..

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  13. I have avoided having any notice of him, until he was foisted upon me yesterday during the hearings…….. no words. Let us know if his trial will be on tee vee or radio Rightness has to show up someplace.

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