Snicker Time
Shake your heads, Honey, because it’s time to snicker right here at the beauty salon.
Snicker #1: A Florida congressional candidate says she’s been abducted by aliens in a damn spaceship. Bettina Rodriguez Aguilera says she was abducted by “three blond, big-bodied beings — two females, one male — visited her when she was 7 years old and have communicated telepathically with her several times in her life, she says.”
You know, like Toni Orlando and Dawn except Norwegian.
Snicker #2: The Miami Herald has endorsed her, calling her “a strong candidate in the race with plausible conservative ideas.”
Maybe plausible is not plausible.
The newspaper says that her ideas about spaceships and stuff do not interfere with what kind of congresswoman she’d be. Yeah, she’ll hardly even stand out among the other Republican wackos in congress. It’s like, “Hey, voters, pay no mind that she hears voices in her head. She supports Trump, who also hears voices in his head and that’s worked out just fine.”
There are nine candidates in the Republican primary and this was the best they had. That, little buddies, is what the Republican Party has become.
Thanks to Louis N. for the heads up.
Florida wasn’t that whacko 45 years ago when I was last there. Did they start putting something in the water?
1Who among us can’t say that we weren’t abducted by blonde aliens? It’s a rite of passage for the Space Force.
2Hmmmm. . .I think that if I had been abducted by aliens and I were running for political office, I would keep quiet about it. Otherwise, I might sound nuts.
3She should fit right in. With GOP ruler. Space cadet bone spurs.
4RE:Snicker #2: The Miami Herald has endorsed her, calling her “a strong candidate in the race with plausible conservative ideas.”
Here Miami Herald, let me fix that endorsement for you, “a strAngE candidate in the race with plausible conservative ideas.”
I know Texas has a felonious AG and dozens of county commissioners on probation for DWI, etc, BUT candidates with an alien abduction in their background crosses a personal line. How can we be sure she won’t be abducted again and miss one or more legislative days? Should her pay be docked? Should the Governor appoint a temporary replacement until she is returned to planet Earth? Should a special election be scheduled?
Enquiring minds want to know!
5Looks like one of the aliens is standing next to her in the photo.
6I see there problem here is not that they have been abducted. The problem is they sent them back!
7While the snacilbupeR aren’t much for diversity, they are stubbornly consistent about having at least one conspiracy wingnut per congressional race. Bettina appears to have matriculated from the same wingnut grooming center as Kelly “Contrails” Ward (R-AZ).
8Well, Dang! What are these people been trippin’ on?
If there were any aliens, they have should have collected her and the rest of conspiracy wing nuts and dropped them all off at a planet on the far edge of the galaxy.
9Haven’t been to Florida in years but my impression is that she would fit right in, no heads turning, no breath sucked in, no problems whatsoever. If she said it with a big gun in her hand while handing a large government check to somebody planting either sugarcane or housing developments in what used to be good wetlands, even more Florida. I’m willing to be corrected.
10Sometimes I read a story like this, crazy candidate, but wait! there’s more, Miami Herald ENDORSED crazy candidate! and I wonder, was it really worth getting out of bed this morning?
11Did Benny or Bjorn stay home that day?
12Which one of those two is the wacko?
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