And it’s going to shock you that he’s not from Texas.  He’s from Ohio.  Which proves, once again, that gun nuttery is contagious.

Paul Trimacco is 31 years old and he lives in Struthers, Ohio, with his girlfriend and his 9 year old son.  The neighbors called the police last week to report that  that shots were fired at Trimacco’s house at 2:30 in the morning.

When police arrived, Trimacco was in the backyard.

When police arrived at the residence, they found Trimacco — with his face painted, and donning camouflage military fatigues and a helmet — walking around the backyard and carrying a gun.

He told the police that someone had tried to break into his house and he fired shots.  And that the burglar returned gunfire and hit him in the hip.  The reason for his get-up at 2:30 am?  Well, of course, someone had tried to break into his house the night before and he was sitting up waiting for them because he thought they might try again.  And you paint your face just in case Duck Dynasty needs a new character.  Okay, I made the last thing up but the rest is true.

The police smelled something fishy because police are trained to do that.

Then the real story finally comes splattering out.

Trimacco confessed to making up the burglary story to explain how he actually shot himself while testing the credibility of his flak jacket, because he didn’t want his girlfriend to know the truth about his injuries. Trimacco said he’d been hit by a ricochet while shooting the jacket, and that he later fired several rounds in his basement — and blamed them on a burglar — to cover up the accident.

Wait, are you telling me that the flac jacket caused a ricochet?  Hey, at least it would work for the wearer.  Friends close by would be in trouble, though.

And the reason he Trimacco would be Man of the Year not not some damn runner-up?

According to the police report, Trimacco had accidentally shot himself a few months prior to last week’s incident, too.

We have our winner.

Thanks to Bananas for the heads up.