Before I let you read this story, I need to explain something about Channelview.  Channelview sits on the banks of the Houston Ship Channel amid the lovely fragrances of the petrochemical industry, the cosiness of adult bookstores, and enough churches for Mike Huckabee to make a living.

It has the crime rate of Bangkok.

April Bautista heard last Thursday that her brother had died.

“My brother didn’t have life insurance. Brother’s there already at the funeral home but we can’t do nothing yet because we don’t have the funds,” she said.

So the family decided to sell barbecue plates to raise the money.

Their first customer was their friendly next door neighbor.  He bought a plate of barbecue but came back right away because he said the chicken was cold.  So, being neighborly, they gave him his money back.

The next day he came back, claiming that someone had thrown chicken in his yard.  That must be a violation of deed restrictions because he was plenty mad about it.  He was yelling and hollering.

“My oldest son told him hey you need to back off and leave us alone. He screamed at him and he just decided, let me be the man. He then punches my son in the face,” Bautista explained.

“He went and hit him and that’s when he started hitting all of us,” said William Yanez.

The benefit turned into a big brawl. After some heated blows, busted lips and bloodied noses, it was over — so they thought.

The next thing they know, the neighbor goes home and comes back with – come on, guess – a gun.  He first shoots it in the air and then starts shooting at the family.  He hit the sister once in the foot and her mother twice in the leg.

The son who got hit in the face during the first fight summed it up.

“Over a piece of chicken, yeah he’s a coward. That’s why you got hands. You’ve got to use a gun, only cowards do that,” said Yanez.

Yeah, you’ve got hands for two reasons – to fight and to start the microwave to warm the damn chicken.

Thanks to Farhan for the heads up.