I Vote “Hell, Yes!”

September 29, 2014 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

The Heritage Foundation, that conservative elite organization cloistered in Washington DeeCee has come up with a new definition of liberalism and it defines me perfectly.

What do conservatives think of liberals today?

Here’s the view from the Heritage Foundation: Liberalism creates self-indulgent, licentious hedonists willing to cede every other kind of freedom to an increasingly authoritarian government.

“Give up your economic freedom, give up your political freedom, and you will be rewarded with license,” said Heritage’s David Azerrad, describing the reigning philosophy of the left. “It’s all sex all the time. It’s not just the sex itself—it’s the permission to indulge.”

I do not know what the hell tarnation you are doing at this website when there is sex to be had!

In elite conservative eyes, that’s what liberalism is – sex 24/7.

Bill Voegeli

Bill Voegeli

They didn’t get around to explaining why people who are hedonists want government control over their lives, which would include all the crazy stuff Louie Gohmert is talking about and we are so against anything Louie wants.  Best I can figure, the Heritage Foundation is very confused about liberals and libertarians.

There were other puzzling things in the Heritage Manifesto.

Technology-driven popular culture helped liberals lull the masses into complacency, Azerrad continued, citing iPhones, Google Glass, massive multi-player online video games, and “year-round sports” as among the distractions that have left society vulnerable to political and economic servitude.

Year round sports?  Have I been going to the wrong liberal meetings?

Come to think of it, that’s pretty much Junior Janchek, Jr.’s dream life – sex and football year ’round.

Thanks to Irene for the heads up.

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0 Comments to “I Vote “Hell, Yes!””


  1. I think he has confused liberal with libertine.

    Also, when have we had time to engage in sex 24/7 while proposing and passing complicated legislation like Social Security, Medicare, ACA, etc.? Apparently we are so competent that we can do two or more consuming tasks at once.

    One wonders why, given his apparent concern for the erosion of our liberties, he isn’t going full bore against the Patriot Act and other right wing attacks on our freedom.

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  2. Azzerad, obviously from the Planet Mongo. What I want to know is how come he can’t hear the signal from the mother ship to return home?

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  3. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    maggie, Azzerad cannot hear the Mother Ship, because he’s on the wrong frequency. Instead of tuning to the voyager frequency as instructed, he landed on the voyeur’s frequency and simply cannot shake his prurient interests long enough to change the channel.

    That’s the Republican strategy; shrink government enough to slip it through the keyholes to our bedrooms.

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  4. Enlightenment is a great thing. NOW I know why I’ve been a life-long liberal. I also know why I’m so damn tired all the time.

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  5. I googled “Bill Voegeli”. He is a prolific writer. But judging from the titles, “Never Enough: America’s Limitless Welfare State”, “Not a Penny More. The case for antitax absolutism”, etc. What an unhappy little spud.

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  6. Sex all the time?! It works for me! Yabba Dabba Doo!!! These people are sexually deprived perverts. If they think of tamales, it is maybe because they are hungry!

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  7. Ralph Wiggam says:

    If old Bill was right, everyone would want to be a liberal. But licentious hedonism is not for everyone. You have to be tough and courageous enough to face it without a gun or a tax break. That eliminates most Republicans.

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  8. I’m just glad we got the “technology driven popular culture” that lets me have JJ, Jon Stewart, and Stephen Colbert on our side.

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  9. No wonder the Heritage Foundation is so pissy, everyone’s having a good time but them.

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  10. I’m reminded of the gay man who said that he wished being gay was as juicy as some people think it is.

    Someone else said that the difference between Democrats and Republicans is that the Dems want more of your money but will let you pretty much control your own life, whereas the GOP will let you keep more of your money but want veto power over whatever you do with your genitals. I’ll go with Option A.

    “Sex all the time….” Where? Why am I not getting that?!

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  11. Corinne Sabo says:

    Where is the sex all the time? I missed that one. Darn.

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  12. Corinne Sabo says:

    Where is the sex all the time? I missed that one. Darn.

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  13. Yeah, I missed the sex-all-the-time, too, probably because I was raised to be a Republican.

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  14. Marcia in CO says:

    My sex-all-the-time days are long gone!! Must have worn myself out when I was a much younger Democrat doing all that crazy stuff!!

    With all the lunacy that the Repukes are pulling out of their hats … hell, I’m just waiting for the resounding KABOOM when they all implode … or should that be MOOBAK because they will implode and not explode!!

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  15. Well, damnit! I’ve always been a librul, but I don’t remember that sex-all-the-time part. Either I’m a shy breeder or my memory has let me down. Now I have to ask my husband if his memory is any better than mine. If Heritage is right about that part, we should be expecting a lot of converts before the election, but I suspect Ralph Wiggam is correct.

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  16. So it’s not hedonistic to build a multi-million dollar house with an elevator for your cars? I mean, they tried to get that guy elected President.

    I think the core message of this is that it’s only okay to have sex if you really, really, really don’t enjoy it.

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