Holy Crap: Apples Not Far From the Tree

December 06, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Reverend Jerry Falwell, Jr – oh dear God, the man reproduced himself – is now president of Liberty University, that one stop fun stop for all your knuckle dragging needs.

He gave a speech and announced what Super DeLux Brand Christians need to do to be closer to Christ.

UnknownThe president of Liberty University urged students at the Christian school to carry concealed weapons on campus to counter any possible armed attack like the mass killings in San Bernardino, California.

“Let’s teach them a lesson if they ever show up here,” President Jerry Falwell Jr. told students at a convocation Friday.

“I’ve always thought if more good people had concealed carry permits, then we could end those Muslims before they walked in,” Falwell said.

At least he didn’t ask students to carve Jesus on their ammo.

As my friend Rev. Mordecai Ham says, there’s a new trinity: Jesus, Smith, and Wesson.

When questioned about “ending Muslims,” the Reverend responded that he meant Islamic Extremists and if anybody would know extremists …

I have observed that Reverend Jr always has a look on his face like he just smelled something really bad.  So, I can only guess that he does indeed have some self awareness.

Thanks to Mordecai for the heads up.

Be social and share!

0 Comments to “Holy Crap: Apples Not Far From the Tree”


  1. e platypus onion says:

    I distinctly remember jeebus telling his disciples to shoot on sight. Wonder why it took gawd feearing kristians to figure this out?

    1
  2. fran seyer says:

    I saw this and my stomach flipped and not in a good way.

    2
  3. “Let’s teach them a lesson if they ever show up here,”

    It would be the first time a lesson was ever taught at Liberty “University.”

    3
  4. UmptyDump says:

    And Falwell encouraged the audience at his required thrice-weekly student convocation to obtain concealed carry permits. (No fooling.)

    The gathering concluded with the prayer; “Praise de Lawd an’ pass de ammonishun” – and that the next convocation would cheerfully accept bullets in the collection plates. (Fooling – but not beyond the realm of possibility!)

    4
  5. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    For all the wing nuts advocating arming everyone from infant to grandmother, there are two words: cross fire.

    5
  6. Lunargent says:

    Blessed are the slow to take cover, for they shall be known as Collateral Damage.

    6
  7. JAKvirginia says:

    And if those “mooselins” do attack your “university” they can use that phallic tower you’re building to get everybody! Good planning, skippy!

    7
  8. RepubAnon says:

    A few smoke grenades, some firecrackers, and a sound system with intermittent cries of “TERRORIST! Over there, SHOOT NOW!”… and the phrases “fog of combat” and “friendly fire” would take on real meaning.

    8
  9. So students at his “university” should be packing heat on campus. God help them. Any parent who doesn’t yank their kids out of there is dooming them to probable death or serious injury due to the collateral damage which will inevitably ensue.
    They had to be stoopid or crazy to send them there in the first place.

    9
  10. Ralph Wiggam says:

    Shoot first and ask questions later. They finally got around to saying what they were thinking for years.

    10
  11. Ralph Wiggam says:

    Perhaps this is just a policy intended to keep the campus lily white. No one with a good tan would dare to show their face on that campus!

    11
  12. Polite Kool Marxist says:

    In fairness to all the LE and First Responders in the Lynchburg, Virginia area, does this mean they sit outside the Liberty University gates and wait for the smoke to clear before answering 911 calls? Or, should they enter firing, shoot ’em down and sort them out on the ground?

    Revved up Jerry sure isn’t much of a thinker.

    12
  13. Matthew 21:52. “Then said Jesus unto him, Put up again thy sword into his place; for all they that take the sword shall perish with the sword.” (Similar in John 18:11.)

    Seems to me there was also something about turning the other cheek, but I don’t have the verse noted down.

    Unfortunately the students at “Liberty University” are experienced at believing everything an authority figure tells them, so few if any are going to find any anomaly in what this yahoo says Christians should do.

    13
  14. Well, he never claimed to be brainy to begin with, just smarmy like his predecessor door old dad. If there ever is a shootout at Liberty he had better have a well prepared homily to cover all the innocent victims his students took down while missing the bad guys. I guess he’s never ever heard of a hail of gunfire. Tsk!

    14
  15. e platypus onion says:

    Methinks Fatwell Jr just waved a red flag in front of some fed up with kristians Muslims and students may get a chance to flee from gunfire on their campus. I doubt they would actually stand up to an armed gunman,but it makes a nice story for suckers donating to Liberty U.

    15
  16. Junior Varsity Falwell may not be far from the tree, but he is still on the downhill side.

    16
  17. Marge Wood says:

    Remember that’s where Cruz announced that he was going to run for president. And where Bernie Sanders, the good Jew, laid a lesson on them about how to please Jesus.

    17
  18. The proximity of “crap” and “apples” in the title made me think of horse apples, which is what this yahoo is. Well, no– more like a pasture pie, flat and sloppy. And smelling bad.

    18
  19. Don A in Pennsyltucky says:

    Onward Christian soldiers marching as to war,
    With our Smith & Wessons going on before.
    Colts and Glocks and Winchesters killing Muslim foes
    NRA will gui-i-ide us as we buy ammo.

    19
  20. Agreed Rhea. I am a former farm kid. You must be too, or maybe current?

    20
  21. Aggieland Liz says:

    @Rhea-don’t forget that spineless drivel about “loving your enemies” either. They’re writing it out of their newest version, I just know it! Playing nice is for losers, ya know?

    21
  22. Debbo, I’ve spent time on farms, but the only livestock my grandmother had during my lifetime was chickens. Come to think of it, that yahoo looks pretty chicken**** too.

    22
  23. Linda Phipps says:

    No surprise, if the counties surrounding Richmond are the armpits of Virginia, then Lynchburg is its rotton crotch.

    23
  24. Let me see if I have this straight:
    Turn the other cheek.
    Do good to those who do evil to you.
    Beat your swords into plow shares
    And shoot first, ask question later?

    24
  25. Patticakes says:

    I have a niece and nephew via my husband’s sister who are grads of Liberty. Home schooled. Naive. Probably pretty typical of most Liberty students. Good kids, but nonetheless fixed in their Kristian BS. Received the “Photo Christmas Card” Saturday from the nephew and his bride, also a Liberty grad. I am hoping one of the frames with them standing back to back with what appears to be assault weapons turns out to be some sort of drone/toy ala Star Wars, or something other than what it appears to be to my untrained eye. I don’t know. They just moved to Santa Barbara. Brett teaches English as a second language, Crystal is an ICU nurse with a Master’s Degree in nursing. Pretty interesting Christmas card, given the shootings in San Bernardino. Ewww. Now I have to “deal with it”.

    25
  26. @Professor Chaos

    More like “shoot first, shoot later, shoot some more and then when everybody’s dead try to ask a question or two.”

    26
  27. WA Skeptic says:

    Faux Christian.

    27