Golly Gee, Y’all. I’m Staying Inside.
I have a shirt from graphic artist Rob Sheridan’s collection that was given to me at Christmas.
Now I’m rethinking the social sphere and maybe the shirt is not the joke I think it was intended to be.
Y’all, there was a brawl at a Pennsylvania Golden Corral. There were dozens of people throwing high chairs at each other because the Corral ran out of steak. I am not kidding you. There’s even videos of it.
On the video there’s some poor guy walking around saying, “I just wanted some steak.”
Now I want to be honest here. I am not anti-fighting. There are some things worth fighting over. I came real close to punching a guy for trashing talking my Momma. If Mitch McConnell ever knocks on my door, I am going to open the door and punch that sumbitch right on the nose and tell him to get off my property. I believe in the theory of he-had-it-coming.
I looked up Bensalem Pennsylvania and found it has a population of 60,000. I can assure you that whatever Golden Corral was serving was not steak. There’s a fairly high probability that it was some sort of meat, but steak, no.
On the other hand, Golden Corral might be high-falutin’ in Bensalem. The only competition in its class would be Pizza Hut and Mabel’s Pea Soup and More Cafe.
But I’m not sure I want to be social around people who throw rowdy fits in a crowded place over something I wouldn’t eat in the first place. Lurleen respectfully disagrees with me. “Honey, the article says nobody got hurt. If you are throwing furniture in a crowded restaurant and nobody gets hurt, you are not fighting — you’re just horsing around.”
In college, we called the steak we got occasionally “mystery meat.” I’ve been to Golden Corral I think once (in Anchorage), and I’d think mystery meat might be similar to their steak.
1As for Lurleen saying it was just horsing around when they were throwing chairs- I say they are really bad throwers if they missed hurting someone.
If it were the apocalypse and all the other grocery stores & restaurants had been looted and stripped bare of food, and Golden Coral was the last place in Bensalem with a steak, OK, I can maybe see why there’d be some shouting and chair throwing.
Otherwise when you find out there’s no steak, I can’t imagine patrons couldn’t find plenty of other food within a short walking distance. Or even something else on the Golden Coral menu?
2Bensalem is basically an outer suburb of Philadelphia so there are probably at least a few good Italian restaurants within driving distance.
3Well it’s a good thing you weren’t just at the HEB parking lot. I thought there were going to be guns drawn over a parking space to have the groceries delivered to you car.
4terrific add for golden corral, finaly some different news that doesn’t include heer trumpkoff…
5I’ve seen reports of people shooting up fast food outlets because their order was wrong, or too slow, or the place ran out of fries. The problem might be a tad bigger than Golden Corral and its supply problems. The pandemic lockdowns were a chance for some people to forget any civilized behavior they once knew. The guns were always there.
6I think I’m glad to be staying home. I’m glad my spousal unit likes my home-baked bread. I’m looking forward to my garden. I may never go anywhere but church, my quiet little office, and the organic food store again.
People be nuts out there!
7There was no pet food at our supermarket last week, so I fed the pitbull a rethug.
8Ormond, that was mean and just plain nasty of you. Feeding a nice doggy something that disgusting and possibly poisonous – that might bring the Humane Society down on you!
9Lurleen got it right. If you’re throwing furniture and nobody gets hurt, you’re not serious. I hope the manager never lets another one of those people into his/her restaurant again, though. Nobody’s so desperate for Golden Corral “steak” that they need to wreck the joint because the restaurant ran out.
10It’s not about the steak, or lack there of. I lived in Bucks County several times and am familiar with the fine citizens that occupy that county. The Bensalem, Levittown, Bristol area produced the fans who booed Santa and threw stuff at him at the December 68 Eagles game. This area was a hotbed of Tea Party fermentation and became Trump Country before he even thought about politics.
It’s not about the lack of steaks.
11Well, at least there were no reports that the chocolate fountain was harmed.
12https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKuuHE3LRlc
Fortunately there are no Golden Corrals within a hundred miles or more.
Here in Nebraska (“the Beef state” as the license plates used to say, but we’re really #2 so we try harder) you can practically pick whatever steak you like from the nearest steak bush.
13Mark, I thought about that too.
14“Hey! Did you see what that guy’s kid stuck in the chocolate fountain? It’s On Beotches!”
Love your tee shirt….my feelings exactly.
15Hey, us sometimes ‘road warriors’ [long before it became a word] liked being in some burg that had a Golden Corral or something like it in the area.
It helped turn your untaxed per diem and expense money into a profit center.**
Lubys, Furrs, and regular places were nice; but you paid by the item, and for us heavy feeders that could gobble up your extra dinero.
‘All you can eat’, hell yeah … no point in being an epicure on the road.
** All kinds of arcane tax laws, us ‘peons’ sometimes benefit. I had a corporate transfer long ago where the company ‘loaned’ me a huge amount of money [$20K+ fifty years ago was a bunch], apart from the usual transfer expenses for the movers, RE stuff, etc that they paid direct. But somehow I never had to pay it back, corporate transfer dept told me to ‘just forget about it’, Ookk…no prob.
16Oh no! How many people lost their last three teeth?
17I used to take competitive debate and speech teams around the country and wound up in a number of Golden Corrals over the years. Hungry students on a miserly food budget (a small amount from the team, augmented by small amounts refunded from their dining plan, supplemented by whatever grandma had sent in the mail) were able to gain adequate calories, and several developed a fondness for the soft-serve ice cream and the add-ins from the bins.
It is a sign of social decline that people care enough about Golden Corral steaks to do much of anything about them.
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