Fun With Guns: Double Your Fun Edition

February 18, 2015 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Let’s start in Annapolis, where it should be too damn cold to get into trouble, but nooooo.

Ronald Ernest Phelps is 54 years old and “accidentally” shoots his 23 year old son in the stomach.  He was cleaning his shotgun and it, bygawd, accidentally went off.  Come to find out, the elder Phelps is prohibited from owning firearms.  But, the entertainment value does not stop there.

Ronald-Phelps-2.18.15-240x300Detectives executed a search warrant at the residence and located the gun used in this incident as well as a rifle and ammunition. In addition, Northern District Tactical Narcotics Detectives responded to assist with the search warrant and recovered over 200 grams of marijuana from the apartment.

Detectives charged the father, Ronald Phelps, with possession with intent to distribute marijuana, possession of marijuana, as well as illegally possessing a shotgun, rifle, and ammunition as a prohibited person.

The son will be in the hospital for a week or two.  Dad will be in prison a little longer.

Next, a 55 year old Michigan woman earned herself what probably may be the worst obituary ever.

“She was having trouble adjusting her bra holster, couldn’t get it to fit the way she wanted it to. She was looking down at it and accidentally discharged the weapon,” said St. Joseph Public Safety Director Mark Clapp.

When I was a teenager, we used to stuff bobbie socks in our bras, which, on recollection, seems relatively tame and a whole lot safer.

Y’all, promise me that if I die trying to hide a gun between by ta-tas, you will keep it out of the newspaper.

Thanks to Carl and Nancy for the heads up.

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0 Comments to “Fun With Guns: Double Your Fun Edition”


  1. I can’t get my mind around the concept of a bra holster. I saw pictures of them on the interweb world wide. Gosh they look err uncomfortable.

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  2. What is the purpose of a bra? Support and jiggle reduction come to mind. So, stuffing a gun where your left breast is supposed to fit kinda ends the support concept as this guy’s photo of his wife illustrates. Keep scrolling down.

    http://www.ar15.com/archive/topic.html?b=1&f=71&t=1181540

    I think this is all a guy fantasy thing. Come to think on it DuckieJammieBoy might ought to consider a bra with or without a holster.

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  3. First off, that wasn’t Annapolis. We went to college in Annapolis and I don’t remember seeing anybody that ugly. This incidence of stupid thuggery happened in Glen Burnie, up near Baltimore, where it’s much more the norm. “Oh, well, Glen Burnie….”

    The bra holster reminds me of a scene in one of Janet Evanovich’s Stephanie Plum novels, in which a six-foot transvestite pulls a Glock out of his panties when menaced by a couple of punk kids. After the punks run off, Stephanie says, “I thought that was your dingdong.”
    “Jeez, who do you think I am, Thunder the Wonder Horse?”

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  4. I suppose the advantage of a bra holster is that your average mugger might figure you’re just intending to flash him while you are actually nobly defending yourself.

    Flashing would have been safer.

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  5. e platypus onion says:

    Speaking of bobbie socks-former teen idol Lesley Gore passed away at age 68 a couple days ago.

    Green Bay Packers defensive tackle Leroy Guion was areested awhile back in Florida with 357 grams of whacky tobacky,$190,028.81 in cash and a handgun. Although he has been charged with multiple felonies,it is possible law enforcement will give the money back(he said it was for his family) what you never heard of wire transfers or cashier’s checks? and the pot might be considered for his personal use during the off season.

    Most folks arrested with that much pot are automatically charged with being a dealer and the gun and cash only add to the suspicion.

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  6. e platypus onion says:

    Excuse me ma’am,is that a lump on your breast or are you fixing to shoot me?

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  7. So, Rhea, given that I am a Stephanie Plum fan and don’t recall those immortal words, which book was that in?

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  8. Lynne, it’s in “Four to Score,” during the road trip to Atlantic City with Stephanie, Lula, Grandma Mazur, and Sally Sweet. I wish there were more of Sally– he’s a hoot– but he does show up once or twice later.

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  9. @e platypus onion
    For us old guys, those not into the Metric System, could you equate 357 grams to a howevermany “finger baggie”?

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  10. I was born in Michigan and lived there for many years until I left to explore the political jungle that is Washington, D.C. I hereby declare with my hand on my sacred book that I do not know this woman! And, hell, even if I did I have the right not to admit it!

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  11. Old Mayfly says:

    Juanita, I just sent you a “tell Juanita” about the woman in Michigan who fatally shot herself when he adjusted her bra holster.

    I should should have known you would already be on it. The story I read also mentioned the victim was a member of a Christian Motorcycle Club and was a Republican Precinct Delegate.

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  12. Old Mayfly says:

    that should read “…when she adjusted her bra holster.”

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  13. AlanInAustin says:

    Somehow with all these posts, I’m surprised the puns haven’t been flying. Ya’ll must have far cleaner minds than mine.

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  14. Glad you clarified that, Old Mayfly. HE’D have a helluva nerve adjusting HER bra holster.

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  15. Micr: 454 grams to the pound, so just over 12 oz.

    Closer to a gallon baggie than a sandwich baggie.

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  16. Marge Wood says:

    Yeah, I always have trouble with my bra holster too. And we adore the Stephanie Plum books, have reread all of them.

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  17. @eyesoars
    Thanks.

    I guess in the college days of the late 60s early 70s the normal sale involved a 1, 2, or 3 finger baggie, which it seems is a cubic measure. Always in a sandwich bag, 1 finger thick, 1,2, or 3 fingers tall. Or so I’m told.

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  18. Those dumb butts always say they were “cleaning” the gun. You know in fact the guy was probably playing around, doing his John Wayne/GI Joe/American Sniper thing, trying to show his (ahem) ‘manly attributes’, and shot his own child. Jeez, I can’t believe he hasn’t succumbed to Survival of the Fittest yet.

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  19. e platypus onion says:

    Dead woman in Michigan-She was a local Republican official and also served two tours as a member of the United States Navy, it said.
    She also won the 2013 Miss Michigan Figure Overall body-building championship.

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  20. e platypus onion says:

    Micr-click link above and see what all that pot and money looks like.

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  21. Don in Waco says:

    Reports yesterday indicate the accidental-suicide-by-gun-in-bra-holster lady was an elected Republican. Hence, my surprise this wasn’t headline material. She was shot in the eye which makes me wonder why anyone would holster a weapon with it pointed at your head.

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  22. Stranger and stranger. You think maybe it wasn’t really accidental?

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  23. e platypus onion says:

    Maybe she should have had a grapefruit in her bra. The worst she would have gotten was some squirty juice in her eye. From her pictures,it don’t look possible she could hide anything in her bra. Just saying.

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