Florida Man
It was just a matter of time ….
Haines City police say 26-year-old James Blight – yeah, his name is Blight – stole a bulldozer from a construction site and proceeded to ride his happy butt through Haines City, tearing down Biden signs and even running down a taxpayer owned speed limit sign. You’d think violating the city speed limits is probably the last of his worries in a damn bulldozer. He’s apparently a fan of the anarchy crowd, too.
He been charged with grand theft auto because they apparently do not have grand theft bulldozer in Florida, which is a wonder because it’s Florida.
So, if Trump loses Florida he can blame it on the bulldozer guy for his bad choice of vehicles for the job. Everybody knows you steal a backhoe for a delicate job like that.
Thanks to Kary for the heads up.
Better he be named Blight than Bright.
1Mr. Blight bears a marked resemblance to Charles Manson. Maybe genetics or reincarnation were responsible for his helter skelter vehicular assault on those Biden/Harris signs. Because you know if he’s a Republicon he is not personally responsible. GOP, “Party of Personal Responsibility” … another oxymoron like “fiscal conservative.”
2How do you even steal a bulldozer? (Asking for a friend.)
3I always get the two confused, is it allegory or metaphor when a person runs roughshod and bulldozes over the rights of others? And the bulldozer was never his from the start?
4Oh, the prop bets are plentiful. Of course, they stole the first one by reporting that it was Florida. Here is the second prop bet:
Odds
5On Meth 2 to 1 odds
On Booze 4 to 1 odds
on painkillers 5 to 1 odds
on drugs/other 10 to 1 odds
Sober and stupid 20 to 1 odds
Did it on a 50 buck dare 50 to 1 odds
Nick @ 5 we’ll take “Did it on a 50 buck dare 50 to 1 odds” for $100. To cover the over/under line, we’ll take “hold my beer.”
6The face of an asshole and Trumpf cultist. I’m sure his family is soo proud of their boy. Expect him to be bailed out by Trumpf so he can appear at a rally. If a felony, I feel another pardon coming on.
7The other news about this is it was a predominantly black neighborhood and the homeowner was a vice mayor of the town. That should also energize more voters to come out.
Florida seems to have some special kind of tropical RWNJ’s. It’s FL where the guy lived that was mailing poison to congressmen?
8My bet is Meth.
9This guy is a smug looking asshole, and probably from LA
( lower Alabama).
Doubt he even votes. Just bitches about whomever is in power and how he caint get a good job cause of affirmative action, immigration, etc. Everyone is against him, the sort of loser who would embrace the Grand Old Party and the Confederate flag and the KKK.
God help Florida
I was going to ask why, why, oh Lord, did no one shoot this Krazy Kracker, but Steve in Beaverton pointed out that it’s a predominately Black town. Black victims can’t get away with shooting white racists, no matter what they do. It aint allowed.
10Just use of the term “hold my beer” has to be even odds. Everything else is a crapshoot. The local sports radio station here used to do a segment called “With All Due Respect” where each host got to read a story of some idiot doing something stupid. Mind you, these came from news stories and could literally come from anywhere in the world. Florida came up so much they started playing “Dueling Banjos” in the background when the story came out of Florida. My personal favorite was the genius that kept a bucket of urine at the ready so he could throw it on law enforcement if they tried to come in the door. Only in Florida.
11Nick @ 5. Washington Post says he claims he drank so much he cannot remember, which I disbelieve because it isn’t all that easy to operate a dozer drunk.
Joyce @ 9. Commenter at Wonkette looked it up and he appears not to be registered to vote
Still, as far as I have seen, the most extreme event in the quadrennial sign-staling derby happened not too far from me in Maryland and it was a Biden supporter. He was putting up Biden-Harris signs when a Trump truck drove past and he shot at it with a shotgun.
12Hey JJH, looky here!
CORRECTION (Oct. 26, 2020, 12:45 p.m. ET): A previous version of this article incorrectly described the machine that was allegedly stolen. It was a front-end loader with a backhoe arm, not a bulldozer.
had it right from the start, didn’t you? https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/bulldozer-thief-drove-through-florida-town-digging-biden-harris-campaign-n1244750
13He would never have made it thru my yard…let’s just say I’m psychotic!
14By chance I just read this article by the eminent historian David W. Blight, clearly no relation. A sobering look at the election by an expert on the first Civil War.
https://www.nybooks.com/articles/2020/11/05/republicans-the-new-confederacy/
15Around here, they mostly just steal the signs by hand….There’ll be a group of signs from everyone, and the next day you go by and all the dem signs are gone. I’ve replaced signs for the local candidate I’m working for several times (and I stapled them on the wires, so these guys are having to work at it a little)…. I always have a few extra at the ready.
16L.Long @ 14 …
17I think in Florida … it is the Castle and moat doctrine … you are legally allowed to defend your residence, the yard around it, and anything until you get to water that needs a bridge over it.
Saw a nighttime Ring video clip on Twitter of a nude guy stealing a Biden/Harris sign. I’ll see if I can find it.
Ah, here you go! Don’t be drinking anything before you click on this. The caption says it all.
https://twitter.com/ALT_uscis/status/1320924703196958727
18Hannah @18: you left off the best part of the tweet about a nude sign-stealer, the follow-on comment “Now we know what Alex Jones does at night”.
We always treasure trashing Alex Jones here at the salon.
19I am still very happy that I have already voted with my mail in ballot that i personally delivered to my county election office. It seems that there is a good chance that the crazies will be out i force on November 3rd trying to do a vicious job on lined up voters. Michigan has already seen two armed groups show up at an early voting spot. One group was intensely pro-trump and the other decidedly not.
Happy trails to youuuuu as Roy Rogers use to sing!
20“When bulldozers are outlawed only outlaws will have bulldozers”….
21