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Y’all all know about Juanita’s favorite wacko in the Texas House of Representatives:  Leo Berman.  Leo “Damn, I Hate Mexicans” Berman has a new bill.

There are bad bills, and then there are mean-spirited bad bills. No way should the Texas Legislature approve state Rep. Leo Berman’s bill that would add an 8 percent fee to remittances sent to Mexico and other Latin American countries.

But there would be no 8 percent added when a person in the U.S. sends money to family members in other countries — Canada, Europe …

Berman, a Republican from Tyler, said the fee might raise some $60 million annually, and that money could go to agencies that provide indigent care. He said Latin Americans make up some 99 percent of indigent-care persons in this country.

Juanita admits she does not know where Leo came up with that 99% number but she suspects you should reference his patootie if you quote it.

Now, Leo has thought this sucker through, but he’s doing the two-step while the band is playing a waltz.  Leo says that he’ll refund the 8% tax to natural born US citizens if they fill out a form and mail it, along with proof of citizenship, to the Texas Comptroller’s office.

“I believe that who I send money to falls under the category of none of Leo’s damn business,” Juanita stomps.

And even though Leo’s shenanigans might bring it $60 million dollars, a number also referenced by Leo’s esteemed and apparently fact-filled patootie, the State Comptroller says that she’ll have to hire staff of an additional 50 full-time employees to not only bank the collections, but handle the refunds and conduct audits on businesses that take the 8 percent fee.

So, this ain’t about making money.  This is about being mean to poor people, which is Leo’s specialty.  Juanita swears he was baptized in vinegar.

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I am speechless and I am speechless never.

MyFoxHouston reported on former pole dancer who now uses the activity as a fitness technique and holds monthly Christian-themed classes at her studio in Spring. The women wear high-heeled platforms, listen to worship music and pole dance… for Jesus.

After her video aired on Fox, I chatted with Crystal Deans, a Southern Baptist and the owner of Best Shape of Your Life dance studio, about her pole dancing, her faith and the response from viewers.

No, I am not making this up.  I could not make up those shoes.  Even in my wildest dreams.

I doubt the Sisters at Our Lady of Perpetual Virginity are gonna approve.

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You gotta take a number and wait in line to wear the Crazy Woman Crown nowadays.  Becky found us another one.

Like her close colleague Chuck Pierce, who yesterday declared that the earthquake and tsunami in Japan was an attempt by God to topple “a stronghold of spiritism,” Cindy Jacobs weighs in on the tragedy to declare that Japan has always been a “hard group for the gospel” because it was rooted in idolatry – even the island itself “looks like the head of a dragon” – and so God is trying to shake the nation because “the Holy Spirit wants to breathe the wind of revival across Japan and bring a mighty spiritual awakening to the land of the rising sun with healing in His wings.

Well, why didn’t I see that?  That’s so damn obvious.

“It appears that Cindy Jacobs is a prophet, so I guess she’s an expert on these dragon things and a really hacked off God,” Juanita relates while googling Cindy.

It also appears that she’s really happy and has a horrible frosting job.

“You know, if she’s a prophet, it seems she might have warned the people in Japan to go to higher ground.  I mean, that just seems like the Christian thing to do.”

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And speaking of cheesy crackers —

U.S. Rep. Michele Bachmann says she fears the Obama administration will create “re-education camps for young people, where young people have to go and get trained in a philosophy that the government puts forward and then they have to go to work in some of these politically correct forums.

Babe, you mean like the United States Military?

“You can go to the site linked above and hear a recording of Bachmann saying these things but I swear her voice is perfectly tuned to shatter crystal, baseball bats, and the occasional small mammal,” Juanita warns.

“Okay, here’s a woman who went to Oral Robert’s University law school yacking her mouth about re-education camps.  That’s just unnaturally weird.”

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Well, day-um, Honey, we’ve been knowing that things ain’t been good since Elvis died..

Solving our national debt problem might be more of an income dilemma and less about a debt problem. A recent chart compiled from IRS and Tax Foundation data suggests the rich have been paying fewer taxes as compared to the middle class for over 20 years.

Thanks to Carl for the heads-up.

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Born on a mountain top in Tennessee,
Greenest state in the land of the free.
Raised in the woods so’s he knew every tree,
Killed him a bear when he was only three.

Barack.  Barack Obama.

Juanita is proud to announce that Donald Trump is a birther.

“That right there settles it for me.  Barack Obama killed him a bear, fought at the Alamo, woke up Paul Revere, rowed George Washington across the Delaware River, and can account for where he was on November 22, 1963.  Donald Trump, of course, can’t.”

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