It is probably pretty boring in Ohio and I say that because they have to make their own fun.

Patrick Johnson is the head anti-choice guy in Ohio and he, of course, is just all a’tither about boobs.  His church has been protesting at a topless bar for years.  One Sunday, just for the helluva it, the topless dancers returned the favor and protested his church, topless.

Was he upset?  Is a frog waterproof?

He wants to stop all this public nudity.  In Ohio.  To me, and I only speak for myself here and not the entire staff of the World’s Most Dangerous Beauty Salon, Inc. because some of them disagree with me, the problem in Ohio is that there is not near enough public nudity.  Verdelia disagrees.  “It would take more than a few nakkid hooters to get me to vacation in Ohio,” she says.

Patrick Johnson wants to outlaw nakedness in Ohio.  You have no idea the problems naked is causing in Ohio.  But, Patrick is more than willing to tell you …

“The gay pride parade in Columbus is 500,000 strong – why? Because the women go topless,” he insisted on Facebook. “This is the only one where I’ve seen this level of nudity. San Francisco, Chicago, Washington, D.C. I have never seen the kind of public lewdness I have seen in Columbus, Ohio.”

Okay, just a thought here.  He does understand, doesn’t he, what gay means, right?

Just a second thought here.  How many Pride parades did he have to attend to come up with this scientific measurement of cross country lewdness?  Buck Pochek over at The Good Folks at Buck Pochek’s Rural Entertainment Promoters and General Purpose Feed Store, says he’d like to apply for that job when nakkid season opens again.  He wants to publish “Naked: The Coloring Book.”  That’s a best seller, for sure.

But, Patrick ain’t finished yet.  Outrage is an aphrodisiac in rightwing nut land and sometimes it takes an extra dose or two to get the juices flowing, so Patrick keeps on raging on.

“I am sick that women can legally bare their breasts to children and to married men against their will in Ohio,” he says.

Patrick, they are just ta-ta.  See, I’m sick that preacher men can bare their nakkid hypocrisy and really, really bad hairdos in stinkin’ public.

Thanks to Brian for the heads up.

Congresswoman Cathy McMorris Rodgers is from Washington state.  I have it on good authority that she’s pretty stuck on herself.

Well, now she’s stuck on more than herself.

It appears that Cathy sent out mailer about social security and how Obamacare hurts social security and that she’s going to “restore Medicare.”  Bullcorn.

Well, come to find out, the woman pictured on the mailer passed away well over a year ago.  Her friends are not happy about this.  It seems that the congresswoman did not get permission to use the picture.

“So here’s a flyer protecting us from senior cutbacks,” Tim Brattebo said. “It gives the appearance that [the Congresswoman] is talking to Maxine about this. Well I know she wasn’t.”

Her office says, “There was a breakdown in our standard approval process at the staff level…” yada yada yada.  Obama.  Freedom.  Liberty.

Thanks to Brian for the heads up.

You’re gonna think this is from The Onion.

It ain’t.

It’s genuine certain powerful truth.  Rick Perry can’t remember what crimes he got his butt indicted for.

No, seriously.

Perry was a little unclear when explaining what felony charges were issued against him.”I’ve been indicted by that same body now for I think two counts, one of bribery, which I’m not a lawyer, so I don’t really understand the details here,” Perry said of the grand jury that indicted him.

A grand jury indicted Perry last week on two felony counts — abuse of official capacity and coercion of a public official — over a 2013 veto threat.

It’s not that complicated.

1. Abuse of official capacity

2. Coercion of a public official

3. Thank goodness, there’s nothing for him to forget here.

There’s no bribery charge.

But this might be a hint that we should look for one.  He probably did that, too.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.

Do you remember the old song “Fox went out on a chilly night?”

I wrote one for Rick.

Ol’ Rick went out on a dusty day,
And warned the coyotes to stay away
He didn’t have time to hang and play
And shoot them in the head-oh!
Dead-oh! Bled-oh!
He didn’t have time to hang and play
And shoot them in the head-oh.

Right outside, on the statehouse lawn,
He ran into his buddy Sean.
They both had all their Kevlar on
And a big fat American flag-oh.
Drag-oh! Scrag-oh!
They both had all their Kevlar on
And a great big American flag-oh.

They rode on down to a border town
And Rick and Sean both had a frown:
The water in the river was down
And illegals were coming over.
Plover! Red-Rover!
The water in the river was down
And illegals were coming over.

“The Rio Grand should be a moat,”
Said Rick, “we oughta get a boat.
We’ll be the baddest guys afloat,
With grenades and a machine gun.
Green gun! Mean gun!
We’ll be the baddest guys afloat ,
With grenades and a machine gun.”

They mounted up, these two brave men,
To answer Texas’ call again,
But the enemies’ age was eight or ten
And there was no one to shoot-oh.
Root-oh! Boot-oh!
Just a bunch of kids, aged eight or ten,
That you’re not allowed to shoot-oh.

And that was Perry’s finest hour:
Making children run and cower.
He always would abuse his power
And it soon got him indicted.
Fighted! Blighted!
His pattern of reckless abuse of power
Has now got him indicted!

All together now …..

Our friend Ms. Jay in New York signs up for Republican newsletters to keep an eye on the bad guys.  Please realize that she has never given a dime to any damn Republican or done anything for Republicans except give them her email address.

Apparently, the GOP has some pretty low standards for “most loyal supporters.”

They are telling her their secrets and ordering her not to forward this email.  She sent it to me instead.  So, you get to know the GOP secret strategy to win in 2014.

Click the little one to read the big one.

Okay, so here’s the deal.  They are going to get volunteers.  They are going to talk to their volunteers.  They will also talk to their candidates and parties.  They will use a data delivery system that Democrats have had for years.

So the secret GOP strategy  is “get some damn volunteers.”  I wish we had thought of that.

Thanks to Ms. Jay for the neato email.

The trial court judge is not impressed with Rick Perry’s schoolyard bully talk .

Judge Julie Kocurek of the 390th District Court, a Democrat, said Perry’s Saturday statement, issued a day after the indictment, could be construed as a threat and possible violation of the law. Kocurek, as the administrative presiding judge of all criminal courts in the county, said that “no one is above the law,” and the public needs to know that grand jurors are legally protected from any threat.

The judge was upset that Perry said, “I am confident we will ultimately prevail, that this farce of a prosecution will be revealed for what it is, and that those responsible will be held to account.” Of course, the only people responsible are the judge, the special prosecutor, and the grand jurors.

So, she stood up to the bully.

Threatening a grand juror is a second degree felony with a 20 year prison sentence.

Keep pounding your chest, Rick. It’s entertaining.