He’s gonna do it.

These two smiling faces made it official.  Louie Gohmert is running for speaker of the house of representatives.

Yep, Louie chose the doofus Tucker Carlson to make his announcement.

Rep. Louie Gohmert (TX-01) spoke to Tucker Carlson on Fox & Friends about the need for someone to step up and run against Speaker Boehner in this new Congress. He echoed what many House Members are saying that there needs to be new leadership, not just the status quo and he is happy to accept the challenge.

Well hell, if he’s going to speaking the most, might as well give him the title.

Let the popcorn popping begin!

Oh, Florida, sometimes I love you so much.

A couple got trapped in a closet for two days at Daytona State College.

Bless their hearts.  Can you even imagine the horror of being trapped in a closet for two days?  And then to get arrested?

Police were alerted to the couple when a distressed man called the police saying that his son was trapped in closet at the school.

Police had been led to the college campus by pings on a cellphone, per WFTV. Upon arrival, the couple — John Arwood (31) and Amber Campbell (25) — was found in the closet in the science building.

It was unknown as to why they were in there in the first place.

Unknown?  Really?  Not even a hint?

In an odd twist, the police state that the couple could have just gotten out of the closet at any time. The door locked from the inside so they simply could have walked out on their own.

Well, obviously not physic majors.

Detectives did notice the scent of meth when the two trapped in the closet exited. An object that is commonly used to smoke crack was also found in their possession.

 

Yep, no hint as to how they got into the closet, but I think we can figure on how they couldn’t get out.

Ole David Duke is threatening congress.  He says that if congress doesn’t leave Steve Saclise alone, he’ll name congressmen – both Democratic and Republican – who have licked his boots.

Do it, weasel.  Do it.

In fact, I’ll give you fifty bucks cash American money to do it.

Next, the Koch brothers threaten to expose congressmen in bed with them.  Hell, Bros, we’ll give you the keys to Los Angeles for that.  Sorry, El Lay, but we need to save the rest of the country and y’all ain’t much anyway.

What David Duke considers a threat, I consider a blessing.

Thanks to Sharon for the heads up.

Let’s start the New Year off with a bang.  (See what I did there?)

At 4:15 am on New Years Day, Peachtree Police Chief William E. McCollom called 911 to report that he accidentally shot his wife – twice.  Seriously.

The GBI will handle the shooting investigation. GBI spokeswoman Sherry Lang originally said Chief McCollom called 911 to say he accidentally shot his wife twice with his service weapon. After further investigation, Lang said it was determined that only one bullet had been discharged.

Well, I can understand that.  Do you have any idea how hard it is to count at 4:15 am?

The victim was taken to the hospital where she is in seriously condition.

Now here’s my question:  how do you accidentally shoot someone at 4:15 am? Was she trying to crawl out the window and you thought she was coming in?

Something tell me that this story is only going to get better.

Thanks to Carl and Brian for the heads up.

Do y’all have any New Year’s Resolutions.

I am going to try to find more nice things to say about Republicans.  I expect to do this for no whole days, just like they did for me.

Jesus took a real beating in the Bible Belt this week.

First you have county clerks in Florida refusing to perform their duties in Jesus’ name amen.

If same-sex marriage is allowed, Duval Clerk of Courts Ronnie Fussell, Clay Clerk Tara Green and Baker Clerk Stacie Harvey will have no choice but to issue marriage licenses to gay couples. But to avoid performing ceremonies for them, these clerks have decided to end all courthouse weddings.

Love one another, y’all.

Then there’s the shootin’ minister.  This is one odd story.

So there’s the minister of Windsor Hills Baptist Church, Tom Vineyard, in Oklahoma City.

Vineyard is an advocate of gun rights. He wrote an open letter in 2011 to Oklahoma City Police Chief Bill Citty, criticizing statements the chief made supporting stricter gun registration laws.

Windsor Hills Baptist Church also has offered gun training sessions for its members.

That’s kinda weird but what the hell, it’s Oklahoma.  But even in Oklahoma, they called this guy and his church “controversial” for their emphasis on firearm training even for church youth.

So last Saturday afternoon, Vineyard gets a call from his home alarm company that motion had been detected at his house. Instead of calling the police, Vineyard rushes home, heart pounding in excitement no doubt, and finds an unarmed 14 year old African American male in his home hiding in a closet.

Vineyard says the unarmed 14 year old attacked him so he had no choice but to shoot him dead.

Prosecutor David Prater said the use of deadly force by Vineyard, pastor of the Windsor Hills Baptist Church, was “completely legitimate.”

And there’s this ….

CBS affiliate KWTV reports that a warning on the pastor”s front door reads: “Nothing on this property is worth your life.”

Well, obviously not.

Thou shalt not kill, y’all.

Thanks to Brian and Mike for the heads up.