And the winner is…
There was a spring election for the Hubbard Rural Fire Protection District, about 30 miles southwest of Portland, OR. It is a small district, about 7 square miles, covering some 5,000 residents. Three positions were open, only 2 candidates filed, both incumbents. They both won handily. But the low voter turnout for this off off season election meant that it came down to the write-ins for the third position. We in the PNW usually take our fire district elections very seriously. I don’t know what they are smoking out there in Marion County. But I digress. There were 20 names, five of which got 2 votes each. I’m guessing there was only one each for Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck. There may even have been one for Sasquatch. Whatever could we do to solve this problem???
We roll a 12 sided die. None of the write-ins were there but they all had stand-ins. Can we have a drum roll please while someone tosses the die?
Unbelievably, the first roll had 3 of the 5 come up with 10s. So drum roll once again please.
The dice don’t lie. The new would-be Fire District Commissioner, who is not paid, but is part of a board that oversees 6 paid staff (2 seasonal) and 26 volunteers is DONALD J. TRUMP, whose surrogate rolled him a 12. See? He can still win an election!
But wait just a minute. He has to own property or live in the district. They’re working on determining if he is eligible. I needed this laugh today. Seriously.
Will no one rid us of this ridiculous Orange Moron???
1“He has to own property or live in the district.”
I can imagine Trump buying the cheapest lot in Hubbard, and filming reelection ads from atop the fire truck wearing a red fire hat. Flipping on the red lights and claiming he’s on his way to rescue us from our emergency.
And stiffing the owner of the lot he bought.
2Of course, someone would elect a stupid, vile, lying, cruel, cheating, indicted criminal, rapist, loser named DJT. I wonder, were they serious or was this just a joke?
3slipstream hisownself was, long ago, a volunteer firefighter in a sparsely populated county in Oregon (not Hubbard RFPD).
Mostly drove ambulance to late night drunk driving crashes.
It is damn serious work, even if it is unpaid.
People should take this seriously and appreciate the volunteers for turning out in the wee hours of the morning to attempt to help neighbors.
Whoever wrote in “Trump” should be made to ride along on one of those 3 a.m. ambulance runs, then apologize to the families of the deceased while their world is falling apart all around them.
4Baldy – “Who, what, where ?” .
5I can’t believe I never even considered something like that.
I mean, IMHO The range of people who like trump goes from those who really believe he’s the second coming of hey Zeus in everything but name, to those who know exactly how much of a lying, shit talking wannabe dictator he is and f**king adore him for it.
And everything in between.
I think somebody’s gonna do some research at some point
And find out that that weasel headed fucknugget (Thanks Scotland!) has been written in on more ballots of every conceivable type than any “person” in history.
Slipstream, thank you for your service.
6Thank you Slipstream. I live in a rural area in SW WA where we are served by a volunteer FD. My friends and neighbors are always on call, fire season is especially stressful with our winds. We do take these elections seriously. A couple of years ago, I was with a friend in one of the FD3 vehicles, the water truck was lined up in front of us for the 4th of July Parade when the call came to put out a fire started by some idiot by the river with fireworks. It was blowing east towards a cluster of Native American homes, they were trying to stop it with hoses. I am really astounded that they didn’t just appoint a person at the next meeting rather than indulge the whims of someone who thinks they are funny. Fingers crossed for a safe, fireless 4th.
7Can the Fire District Commissioner work from Jail?
8VFDs, RFDs, tough stuff like y’all covered; had a pager myself once.
RE: Oregon and Portland– On my local NextDoor cesspit I’ve been mixing it up with some RWNJs. Nearly illiterate, illogical, obnoxious yahoos [75-80% of pop. here], but fun to bait them once in a while.
9They are incapable of a rational discussion, but are good at hurling insults.
The most common recent insult is ‘move your ass to Portland or Oregon’ [must be the thing on the RWNJ media, since they just parrot whatever they’re told]. Followed by a list of what a stinking mess the PNW is, with libruls and criminals overrunning the place.
Never been near there, so WTF?
It isn’t too far from Portland where maggots dwell and are closing in on being in the majority. I’m not shocked that DJT won as a write in. The greater Iduho movement is also spreading amongst these areas.
10And Sandridge, I was on nextdoor for a while (in the Portland suburbs) till I just couldn’t take the right wing nutjobs that infected it. Life’s too short for that frustration.
Did the ballot specify Donald J. Trump Sr.? Or Junior?
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