A Nakkid On The Backporch Kind Of Day
In Texas, we described a great weather day as being a nakkid on the back porch kind of day.
Some dude in North Carolina took that very seriously.
Brian Tracy Carroll, a 45 year old guy who looks like he ate his brother, got all hacked off at his neighbor and decided, perhaps rightly so, that the worst thing he could do to that neighbor in retaliation is to sit in the backyard in a lawn chair and that’s all.
They say he did have a towel around his neck although I’m not sure if the guy has a neck.
Deputies asked Carroll if he had threatened his neighbors by saying that he had an AK-47 and “knew how to use it.” Carroll said that he did make the statement, then laughed, according to the report.
I suspect that’s funny because why would you even ask. Of course he did. Duh.
Thanks to Victoria for the heads up.
I’ll bet he’s got a banjo too…two of them even, also.
Can we take an IQ points poll on this dude?
1I’ll guess ~85?
Or maybe closer to his waist/chest size?
If I was the neighbor, I would put a few tranquilizers in some sausages and throw them over the fence. You know Brian Tracy Carroll won’t be able to resist. Then wait half hour and hope he passes out on his stomach, not great but it’s the best case scenario. This also allows him to gets sunburned on his backside, and your problem is solved. No more sitting out back on the straps of a lawn chair, at least for a week or two.
2If I was Hank Jr, and I’m NOT, and I wanted to do a Deliverance-like video of my semi-legendary hit, Country Boy Can Survive, Brian Tracy Carroll, would be my first choice to embody the role of Country Boy.
3Hey, I’ve got two banjos, and I “know how to use ’em”. Watch it, buster!
4Micr,
Be happy you do NOT have to hear reports of the disgraced ‘ole Hank’ annoying and harassing the local kids during ‘Friday Night Lights’ in the small town he moved to about an hour out of NashVegas. Anytime ‘ole Hank’ is in the news here is because he has done something ridiculously stupid as ‘getting drunk’ and being on ‘the front porch, nekkid’ while shouting and waving a 12 gauge…he wrecked his cred in Nashville about 15 years ago showing up ‘one too many times’ drunk and disorderly when he was the ‘headliner’ at an event here. Hubby and I happened to be at that concert ‘Rolling Thunder’ on the Riverwalk along with thousands of others…for charity. Ole Hank was so drunk when one of his ‘helpers’ who was a teenager, tossed him the wrong guitar during the set, he just about threw that kid off the stage into the Cumberland River. Pathetic and insane, that is ‘ole Hank’.
5They should use him to promote abstinence sex-ed.
6The guy’s Johnson probably turned out to be nothing more than Little Johnny.
This is the time to make that familiar comment – “‘Nothing to see here, folks, let’s move on.”
7See his picture? That’s enough of him “nekkid” for me. Blech.
8Evolution gone terribly wrong.
9thank the Goddess for NC, Sc, and Miami…they are making Texas look good.
10That’s my freshman yearbook photo from 1967.
11And look how you turned out.
12Talk about ruining a view.
13Lets just file this under “Those that do, should’nt”
14OK Allright I’m just your average long haired redneck, Kentucky born grew to “adult hood” in Oklahoma and now live in SW Florida.
15I like this guy! Snow birds and Condo Commandos can be very annoying as well as neighbors and not for nothing but sometimes it’s better and more satisifying to annoy people than anything else.
That said It’s a good thing he doesn’t stroll and jiggle across the street to get his mail naked I’m certain his other neighbors appreciate his “discretion”.
The Texas town’s answer to their Chlamydia problem?
Picture of him nakkid. Picture is worth a thousand words.
16@Wallyfl
17Obviously you didn’t read the accompanying linked article because unless your condo neighbor’s daughter rides her horse on the balcony there is no comparison in circumstances. Regardless of how annoying his neighbors are/were, for an adult to expose him/herself to a teenager is beyond creepy and well into perversion.
@ Diane-that’d be cruel and unusual punishments even by Texas standards(or lack thereof).
18Give the pore guy some credit. He admits to having an AK-47 than he knows how to use and sayin’ so to his neighbor, but when he was mad at his neighbor, all he did was sit outside nekkid. Now a guy who will talk about his gun but show his…parts…is like a rattler that rattles to warn you but doesn’t strike. A far better neighbor than the kind that blows a hole in you or your house while keeping all his clothes on.
Not that I want either of ’em next to me.
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