Ted Cruz is gonna start an international incident.  I just know it.  He’s gonna do it.

He’s running for President so he’s off to show his foreign policy experience.  He has yet to relinquish his Canadian citizenship, which I am convinced he is using for a backup plan if his crazy economic policies don’t work, so God only knows what passport he’s carrying.

U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz of Texas will visit Ukraine this month and meet with leaders of the protest movement that forced out the country’s pro-Russian president.

Dates and details of his other stops were not immediately released Tuesday by his office. Ukraine has a May 25 presidential election.

I need to be honest and say that I will pay cash money to see Cruz and Putin wrestle.  Thelma says she’ll pitch in an extra ten bucks if they promise to keep their shirts on.

Now, get this.

Cruz has said the U.S. should install anti-ballistic missile batteries in Poland and the Czech Republic as safeguards for Eastern Europe, and push for liquefied natural gas exports to reduce Ukraine’s dependence on Russia.

You’re going to put antiballistic missiles in Poland?  Oh, that’ll be cheap.  We can totally afford that.  And we’re going to give away liquified natural gas?  What’s that?  Ted’s plan to make America totally dependent on foreign oil?  Plus, it would take 7 to 10 years to develop the method to get it there.

Honey, I live in a part of Texas that up until about 5 years ago had a radio station that broadcasted in Czechoslovakian.  Hell, they don’t even broadcast in Czechoslovakian in Czechoslovakia.  So, I know what I’m talking about.  The Czech Republic has their own natural defense system – accordions.

Thanks to Carl for the heads up.