Archive for April, 2020

Greg, Get Under The Bus!

April 23, 2020 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

 

 

I wanna tell you something.  Texas has been spared the worst of it because the big city mayors and county judges – almost all totally Democratic – shut this place down.  But, it’s not over yet. Science people say that we won’t peek for another week and that’s why they are insisting everybody wear a facemark.

So, our local yokel sheriff, a graduate of Jerry Falwell’s university, is running for congress so he has political statements about everything.  Did you know it’s un-American to wear a facemask because Typhoid Mary has a constitutional right to spit on you and only communists protect their children and their grandmother from damned fools who refuse to wear a mask.

Here he goes ….

 

 

Yeah, head first into an empty swimming pool.

We tried to explain to him that you wear a facemask to protect other people, but he insists that we wear it just to piss him off.

 

Damn Click Bait

April 23, 2020 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Okay, so I’m thumbing through some headlines and I see this on CNN –

 

 

Directly?  Really?  So I go scampering over to read the story.

It’s click bait.  Trump didn’t really run directly over Kemp with a bus or even a go cart.

I thought for sure that I’d get to know what kind of bus it was. Did it have one of those big advertisements on the side? How many tires did it have?  Did he back up and run over him again?  When can we get pictures?  Was there suffering involved?

That’s not fair. You shouldn’t tease people like that. Trump throws everybody under the bus, but when you say “directly,” I expect pictures. Keep that in mind, CNN.

 

Brownie Is Back

April 23, 2020 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

There’s something about animal breeders, maybe?

Remember back to Katrina and “Heck of a job, Brownie” pretty much became the password to unlock all the Bush failures.  Michael Brown was put in charge of something he knew nothing about.  He came to government work after being a horse breeder and supervisor of judges at the International Arabian Horse Association.  He displaced a great city and was responsible for killing hundreds of people.

By the way, he’s now a rightwing talk show radio host.

Anyway, up pops another one.

Alex Azar, Secretary of Health and Human Services, told the country in late January that we had a test for the virus.  We didn’t.

Shortly after his televised comments, Azar tapped a trusted aide with minimal public health experience to lead the agency’s day-to-day response to COVID-19. The aide, Brian Harrison, had joined the department after running a dog-breeding business for six years. Five sources say some officials in the White House derisively called him “the dog breeder.”

I’m just saying this. Garbage in, garbage out.

And here’s Azar, still to this day claiming that he and Trump have done an excellent job.  They are still waiting for the virus to disappear like magic.

This virus is something we need to science the crap out of, and they put dog breeders in charge.

 

Winner, Winner, Mud Pie Dinner

April 23, 2020 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

The best chyron this week.

 

 

 

I Love Yew, Houston

April 22, 2020 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

 

Seen in Houston.

We all missed Houston’s Art Car Parade last week, but you can see some past ones right here.

 

They’re Putting Stupid Juice in the Fort Worth Water System

April 22, 2020 By: El Jefe Category: Alternative Facts, Coronavirus, Shaming Trumpists

COVID-19 cases are still growing exponentially in the US with now over 800,000 cases and 45,000 deaths.  That’s not bothering the old Basement Bar in Fort Worth, though.  There was quite a flame war going on over on their Facebook page this morning after they announced they were fully opening this weekend to sell their $2 beer in exchange for the public health.  Let’s just say that the majority of the comments we’re not very supportive of such idiocy, and the author of the post, who I assume is the owner, got a little chippy with some of the commenters.  Here’s an example:

After over 3,200 comments, most not very complimentary of the bar opening right now, the post was removed.  What I found amazing, though, were the supportive comments i.e. “This was all exaggerated.” “The government can’t tell us what to do.” “It’s just the flu.” “I don’t know anyone who has it,” etc., etc., so forth and so on.  Fort Worth has become the weird mixture of education, sophistication, forward thinking, entrepreneurial vigor, offset by up with mouth breathing stupidity.

I hope they don’t get a bunch more people killed.