Last night at a secretive fundraiser in Florida, Trump brought onstage two war criminals. They were former US Army 1st Lt. Clint Lorance and former US Army Maj. Mathew Golsteyn.  Both had been given clemency by Trump last month.  One was convicted of ordering the murder of 3 unarmed Afghans, and the other charged with murdering an unarmed Afghan.  The fundraiser netted $3.5 million.  One attendee noted that Trump “was in rare form” and “hilarious”.

Yes.  Nothing is more “hilarious” than honoring murdering war criminals.

Sorry, I got on a tear this morning and wrote this without checking to see what El Jefe had posted.  Oh well, I have another take on the same topic, so I’ll leave it.  Sorry, El, for stepping on your toes. (We’re friends so I can call him by his first name.)

One of the best things in my life are lightbulbs that last five years.  I am not fond of ladders and unscrewing glass things to put more glass things into it and then re-screwing the first glass thing after you remember where the hell you put the screws.

Donald Trump wants to Make Juanita Crazy Again again because he thinks those light bulbs made him look orange. Odd how the people sitting next to him don’t look orange even though they are under the same light. Donald’s orange comes from a bottle.

But, now he’s come to believe that wasting water is what made America great.

The president on Friday said he ordered a federal review of water efficiency standards in bathroom fixtures and complained that “people are flushing toilets 10 times, 15 times as opposed to once” in homes with low-flow appliances.

No, that’s not due to the toilets’ operation.  That’s because the people he talks to are full of crap.

Remember: when Trump says people, he means “me.”

They work fine for me.

Then, there’s this.

The president said he’s considering different standards for states with different levels of rainfall.

“There may be some areas where we’ll go the other route, desert areas, but for the most part, you have many states where they have so much water that comes down, it’s called rain, they don’t know what to do with it,” he said.

But 40 of 50 state water managers said they expected water shortages under average conditions in some portion of their state over the next decade, according to a 2014 report from the Government Accountability Office.

So you’ve got ten states, probably all blue where people aren’t full of crap, where Trump can poop.

He’s making me crazy, y’all.

Trump went on one of his now famous word salad rants yesterday, blaming light bulbs for his orange spray tan, then moving on to indecipherable complaining about showers, sinks, and low water flush toilets, and then somehow tying all that to the steel industry.

Here is the entire riff, word for word.  See if you can figure it out.

“The light bulb — they got rid of the light bulb that people got used to. The new bulb is many times more expensive and — I hate to say it — it doesn’t make you look as good. Of course, being a vain person, that’s very important to me. It’s like — it gives you an orange look. I don’t want an orange look. Has anyone noticed that? So we’ll have to change those bulbs in at least a couple rooms where I am in the White House. … We have a situation where we’re looking very strongly at sinks and showers. And other elements of bathrooms — where you turn the faucet on, in areas where there’s tremendous amounts of water, where the water rushes out to sea because you could never handle it — and you don’t get any water. You turn on the faucet and you don’t get any water. They take a shower and water comes dripping out, just dripping out, very quietly, dripping out.People are flushing toilets 10 times, 15 times, as opposed to once. They end up using more water. So EPA is looking at that very strongly, at my suggestion. You go into a new building, or a new house or a new home, and they have standards where you don’t get water. You can’t wash your hands practically, so little water comes out of the faucet. And the end result is you leave the faucet on and it takes you much longer to wash your hands. .. For the most part. you have many states where they have so much water, it comes down — it’s called rain. They don’t know what to do with it. … A lot of things we do are based on common sense. If I didn’t get elected you wouldn’t have a steel industry. … We weren’t going to have a steel industry.”

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A reporter confronted Nancy Pelosi today, asking her whether she “hated” President Trump through her  decision to advance the Democrats’ impeachment inquiry.

She replied,

“I don’t hate anybody. I was raised in a Catholic house, we don’t hate anybody — not anybody in the world. So don’t you accuse me of any [hate],” Pelosi said during her weekly press briefing in the Capitol.

“As a Catholic I resent you using the word ‘hate,'” she continued. “Don’t mess with me when it comes to words like that.”

You can watch the whole episode on CSpan.

When she left, the reporter was a grease spot on the ground.

Don’t Mess With Nancy.

It’s nice to see someone take the fight to Trump.