So, Ted Cruz tweeted that Beto O’Rourke wants to legalize all drugs.

The Houston Chronicle goes on for pages meticulously explaining that this isn’t true.  They use actual documents, city council minutes, direct quote from original sources and charts and graphs to prove that Ted Cruz is wrong, wrong, wrong.

It can be condensed down to this:  The sumbitch is 8 pounds of lies in a 5 pound bag.

Ted Cruz responds that Politifacts is liberal.

Yeah, the truth has a liberal bend.

Y’all, I get confused if I cross the Texas border.  There’s plenty of politics here to entertain me.  So, Roll Call has put together a nifty little Guide of What To Watch For tonight.

I thought maybe somebody else might want to use it.

Click right here.

There’s a sheriff in Morgan County, Alabama, America, by the name of Ana Franklin. She is a law and order, family values, Christian Republican.

She is also a crook.

Among other things, Ana stands accused of … let me take a deep breath here … stealing money from the fund meant to feed inmates, investing that money in a shady used car company run by a convicted felon who also employs her father and her daughter, bribing a 19 year old citizen to put a tracer on his grandmother’s computer, starving inmates and feeding them uncooked beans, firing a jail warden for leaking information to a local blogger who was writing about the sheriff’s wrongdoings, deliberately lying a court to issue a search warrant on the blogger’s computer, raised money for a charity through a sheriff’s rodeo and then lied about the charity part, and, seriously? uncooked beans? How the hell do you eat uncooked beans.

After asking for prayers and claiming innocence, Ana has announced that she will not beseeching re-election.  However, she has every intention of serving out her term.  And her second term will be served out in a jail with uncooked beans.

Thanks to Sarah for the heads up.

Oh yeah, it’s Ollie!

Y’all, it’s kinda sad.  The GOP doesn’t have any leaders left who haven’t been convicted of some damn thing.

Lieutenant Colonel Oliver North is poised to become the new president of the National Rifle Association, according to a press release. North, a Fox News host and key figure in the Iran-Contra scandal, will become president “within a few weeks, a process the NRA Board of Directors initiated” Monday morning, the release says. North is retiring from Fox News immediately.

Remember how he had to be granted immunity before he’d testify before congress on Iran Contra?  Delicate little snowflake.

Thanks to Kary for the heads up.

Well, Jim Bakker is out of prison and he’s trying to save your soul and your butt.

Tammy Faye passed to the great running mascara in the sky, but Jim remarried and found secret information about saving your butt when the apocalypse comes and there’s all that fire and brimstone. Jim has a hide out for you.  He’s not jacking around this time, y’all.

Jim’s selling safe cabins in the Ozarks and supplies to keep you safe, including his six 28-ounce “Extreme Survival Warfare” water bottles for $150.

Has Jim reformed and become legitimate or is he cashing in on fear?

Answer that at your own risk, Bakker tells viewers:

“One day you’re going to shake your fist in God’s face and you’re going to say, ‘God, why didn’t you warn me?’ He’s going to say, ‘You sat there and you made fun of Jim Bakker all those years. I warned you. But you didn’t listen.’ ”

Jim also says that God and God alone made Trump president and that Hillary … oh hell, you just gotta read it yourownself.

Bakker even saw God’s divine hand in Democratic candidate Hillary Clinton’s physical collapse, because of illness, just after she attended a 9/11 memorial in New York City. “9/11 was probably the most stern warning God ever gave to America,” Bakker said on his show. “There’s a collapse coming that’s much bigger than (Clinton’s) collapse. … It’s time to be ready.”

Yeah, go ahead, laugh at Jim.   But then don’t shake your fist at God when you get sick and fall down.

The big news today is that Trump has some financial dealings worthy of a circus sideshow.

About 10 years ago, suddenly outta nowhere Trump starts spending $400 million in cash to buy some really weird stuff.  Described as the “worst time in Donald Trump’s entire adult life to pay all cash for properties,” the cash buys included golf courses, which are not known for a high return on investment, while interest rates were at an all-time low.

Nobody knows where Trump got this sudden infusion of cash.

Oddly enough, Michael Cohen started working for Trump around this same time.

I think this deal stinks of money laundering.  The question is – who is her doing it for?  I’ll give you two guesses and The Little Sisters of Charity is out of the running.

Thanks to everybody for the heads up.