Just a friendly reminder on Cyber Monday that Texas Senator Ted Cruz has been known to sell a Christmas sweater with his face and two other snakes on it.

Nope, I’m not kidding.

So keep your eyes open and grab one of those suckers for the bargain price of way too much money.

Thanks to AlanInAustin for the reminder.

One of the funny things I missed while eating my way though Thanksgiving was this Sarah Hucky-booboo Sanders tweet.

Okay, first off, a southern woman would never, ever say they cooked a pie. They bake pies or even hustle one up. They never cook one.

Second off, you don’t get pie crust like that from a home baked pie.  Home baked pies in the south have uneven lard-filled piece of art in crusty layers.

Third off, look closely at the lower left hand corner and you can see the little tin pan they use at all We Sell Pies places.

She lied about baking a pecan pie.  I mean, what has your life become when you lie about baking pies?

You have become a Donald Trump handmaiden.

.

Thanks to CNN for explaining to Donald Trump how democracy works.

Oooohhhh… busted.

Uh, Mr. Mueller, not to be punny, but you need to step on the gas, Honey.

It appears that Rex Tillerson is firing everybody who knows a wink about foreign policy.

And I’m sure it’s going to come as no shock to you that —

“Among those fired or sidelined were most of the top African-American and Latino diplomats, as well as many women, difficult losses in a department that has long struggled with diversity,” notes the Times.

Hey, I hear Jared might be looking for a job.

Thanks to SGray for the heads up.

At one point this year, I pretty much quit doing Fun With Guns because nobody was following the rules.

So, here’s my yearly rules rant.

To be Fun with Guns, nobody dies unless it’s the person acting stoopid with a gun. If you accidentally shoot yourself dead, you need to be remembered forever as the idiot who shot themselves.

The guy who shot the woman in the head because he thought she was a deer is not Fun with Guns.  That is Scream about Guns, which is a column I don’t do because it just upsets me too damn much and Lord knows I’m upset enough for a whole herd of people.

I love for people to send me tips.  I get bunches every day and appreciate every one of them.  I may write about it that day, two weeks later, or never.  I may answer it.  I may not. Even if I don’t answer it doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate it. It just means I may have a forest fire to put out that day or my head is not screwed in that direction at that moment.  You never know.

Okay, here’s the deal – to be Fun with Guns, it has to be kinda funny.

I hope your Thanksgiving was as good as mine, but I doubt it was.

So, I have no theories about what this is but people all over the United States of Damn America are hearing loud boom  noises and the powers that be claim they have no idea where it’s coming from.

The latest was in Colorado early this morning and it shook some posters off the wall at a local trailer park.  Except, there was no shaking – just noise.

Colorado is not the only U.S. state, where residents of several towns have reported hearing explosion-like sounds. In the past few days, the booms have also been heard in New Jersey, Alabama, Idaho, and Detroit.

The residents of the areas are now speculating about the cause of the noise, now referred to as “Bama Boom”, with some attributing it to active meteor showers, deep earthquake, and even an alien invasion.

All I know is that these things didn’t happen when Barack Obama was president.

One other thing —

Trump tweeted this morning that he was going to play golf “very quickly” with Tiger Woods today. He obviously hasn’t seen Tiger Woods play golf lately.

Additionally, ain’t there some manner of Women’s Protection legislation or something that outlaws those two being together in the same zip code as any woman?  Holy cow, can you even imagine what manner of perverted crap those two talked about?