Archive for April, 2017

You’re Not the Boss of Me

April 13, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Oklahoma Republican Congressman (you’re already cringing, aren’t you?) Markwayne Mullin had a town hall meeting in his district, where is was reminded that we pay his salary.

That just pissed him off.  He was spitting nails and sawing steel.

“You say you pay for me to do this? That’s bullcrap,” Mullin said at the town hall in Jay, Okla., according to a video of the incident.

“I pay for myself. I paid enough taxes before I got here and continue to through my company to pay my own salary. This is a service. No one here pays me to go,” he added.

After constituents pushed back, Mullin reiterated that being a lawmaker is not “how I make my living.”

When he calmed down and realized a day later that he sounded like a real butthole (plus, he couldn’t explain why he takes the salary we give him), he had his poor little spokeswoman tell everybody …

“The congressman reiterates in the video that his work as the representative of the Second District of Oklahoma is a service,” Lawrence said.

“His aspiration is to be a career legislator and not a career politician. He is not, nor does he ever aspire to be, a career politician. His priority will always be to serve his constituents to the best of his ability.”

And the difference between a career politician and a career legislator would be …. spelling?

The best I can figure is that the congressman thinks he’s doing his constituents a favor by screwing them.

I think he attended the Sean Spicer School of ‘Splainin’ Things.

 

Shooting the Hostage – Or Not

April 13, 2017 By: El Jefe Category: Healthcare

Welp, no one can accuse this president of being consistent.  In fact, the only consistent trait Trump possesses is inconsistency.  His administration swerves from ditch to ditch worse than a drunk driver on a three day bender at the local watering hole, and this week’s swerving has been epic.  Yesterday, in an interview with Fox Noise Business, Trump reversed himself from putting tax reform cuts first to going back once again to urinate on people who need healthcare.  Then, in an interview with the WSJ, he declared that he’s going to “force” Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi to negotiate by cutting off federal Obamacare subsidies, which will destroy the program for millions of poorer Americans.

Let’s get this straight – Trump who is already holding poor Americans hostage is now threatening to kill those hostages to force the Democrats to the table.  What a dumbass (sorry, Momma).  If the ACA fails on Trump’s watch destroying Trump’s voters’ health insurance, guess what happens in 2018 and 2020?  Yep, you guessed it, ol’ Dandy Don Meredith will be heard singing “Turn out the lights…” to the GOP.

The real tragedy here is that Trump and the Knuckle Draggers have painted themselves into a real corner here by chanting the “repeal and replace” mantra for 7 years.  All of Obamacare’s problems can be solved if only an adult stood up and stopped the nonsense.  For instance, Alaska solved its problem of skyrocketing premiums by diverting some tax revenues to supplement money being paid out by insurance companies to the sickest insured Alaskans.  The result?  This year’s premium increased dropped from 42% to 7%, and Obamacare continues to function.  The state is also setting up a reinsurance fund to stabilize its market.  Alaskan elected officials are considering introducing legislation to federalize the program.  How novel – working to actually fix a problem rather than burning it down.

Because It’s Aladamnbama, Where They Have Weaponized Jesus

April 13, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Holy crap.

The Alabama Senate has voted to allow a church to form its own police force.

Lawmakers on Tuesday voted 24-4 to allow Briarwood Presbyterian Church in Birmingham to establish a law enforcement department.

The church says it needs its own police officers to keep its school as well as its more than 4,000 person congregation safe.

The Presbyterians need their own police?  The regular police force doesn’t have enough Tasers for Jesus?

Briarwood Presbyterian Church describes themselves in their mission statement —“For God’s glory, we are committed to equipping Christians to worship God and to reach Birmingham to reach the world for Christ.”

I wonder how excited they are going to be when the mosque forms a police force.

I bet that idea was too big to fit in any of the small minds in the Alabama legislature.

Thanks to AlanInAustin and Ralph for the heads up.

Well, That Was Quick

April 12, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

And to think Republicans used to think this was a flip flop.

President Donald Trump, in joint news conference with NATO Secretary General Jens Stoltenberg, said he no longer believes that the foreign treaty organization is “obsolete,” a view he held during the 2016 campaign.

“I said it was obsolete. It is no longer obsolete,” Trump said Wednesday, citing the group’s recent anti-terror efforts.
It’s not that Trump was wrong about it being obsolete, mind you.  It’s that under Trump’s leadership it suddenly became not-obsolete.
The Trump is never wrong about anything.  His mere presence makes NATO important.

Bless His Heart

April 12, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

Y’all, bless Ben Carson’s heart.

Carson went on a two-day “listening tour” to Miami, Florida. I think he’s still trying to figure out what HUD stands for and I deeply appreciate any research he does on the matter.

So he goes to visit a Miami housing development and right after he tried out the foosball table …

Housing and Urban Development Secretary Ben Carson’s two-day visit to Miami — his third stop on a national listening tour — started with a big glitch.

Carson, Miami-Dade County Public Housing Director Michael Liu and five other people got stuck inside an elevator Wednesday on the way down from a visit to the rooftop of the Courtside Family Apartments in Overtown.

He’s stuck in an elevator for 20 minutes.  They have to call the firs department to open the door.  You know for an almost certain fact that in that 20 minutes he forgot everything he had learned that morning.

He’s like George Bush except for the brain surgery.
Thanks to Deb for the heads up.

It’s a Spat, Y’all.

April 12, 2017 By: Juanita Jean Herownself Category: Uncategorized

The Republican have a nightmare scenario and it doesn’t involved nuclear weapons.

Three months into the new Congress, some Republicans are fearful that their failure to repeal ­ObamaCare could spell doom for the rest of President Trump’s legislative agenda.

Some Capitol Hill Republicans have envisioned the nightmare scenario for 2017, and it goes like this: No ­ObamaCare repeal. No tax reform. No trillion-dollar infrastructure package. No border wall.

See, my nightmare scenario is that a handbag designer gets us into nuclear war.

But, even with that aside, Republicans are fighting so badly among themselves that you’d think it was cheerleader tryouts at the Dallas Cowboys.

And the recriminations among Republicans only seem to be getting nastier.

Rep. Mark Meadows (R-N.C.), the head of the conservative House Freedom Caucus, “is a pathological liar who isn’t interested in getting to yes,” one House GOP colleague of Meadows told The Hill in a fit of frustration over the stalled health negotiations.

Then another one blamed Ryan, and then some guy from Idaho claimed other Republican members were trashing each other while hiding behind anonymity.  And then some guy from Nebraska claimed his car was nicer than the guy’s from Indiana.  Okay, so I’m just making stuff up now but you almost believed it.

We need a new rule: if you can’t organize a damn Easter Egg Hunt, you can’t run the country.