Here’s the best chant of the day for the Women’s March:

“Hands too small! Can’t build a wall!”

Last night …

12:00 PM January 20, 2017.  Sitting at my desk, sobbing heavily and quietly into a napkin. I had no idea that was going to happen. It just welled up in the midst of a bite of lunch.

I had to watch – I feel it’s my duty in order to resist to study The Enemy. It’s on my phone via huffpost right now.

Here are the lowlights to a brief, (it ended at 12:19PM) catch-phrase-filled address: (transcribed in real time so apologies for any inaccuracies)

“…an education system flush with cash…” that’s news

“…the crime and the gangs and the drugs…American Carnage” new movie?  Or the theme of your admin?

“…Oath of office = Oath of Allegiance to all Americans…” I don’t like that word

“…refusing to defend our borders…” who did?

“…wealth of the middle class ripped from their homes and reDIStributed (misprounounced) across the world…”

he’s stealing from Kennedy then says “from this day forward, America First.”

more hypocrisy over foreign products yadda yadda

“winning” yadda yadda

“…bring back our borders (?)…” where did they go?

a list of infrastructure

“…people off welfare and back to work across our country with American hands and American labor…” but not with with American Labor

“…we do not seek to impose our way of life on anyone…” ha!

“…unite the civilized world against radical Islamic terrorism which we will eradicate from the face of the earth…” here comes the boom! Plus “eradicate” sounds very Final Solution-y

“…total allegiance to the United States of America…” that word again

“…when America is United, America is totally unstoppable…” TOTES dude

Now he’s singing “can do, can do, this guy says America can do” not really but he may as well

“…black, or brown or white, we all bleed the same red…” there’s some colors missing, and bleeding sounds ominous

“…you will never be ignored again…” can’t say the same for “ignorant”

“We will make America [list: Strong wealthy proud safe great]”

God yadda yadda, the end

A very short speech full of sound and fury, signifying nothing, except this

He wants total allegiance to the United States, which he thinks is now him. The disturbing meaning of the speech is that a shroud of muscular authoritarianism has fallen over our bright land, and people who belong in the penitentiary now control every lever of power we have.

12:30 and it’s all over. Get ready to resist.

Right into the District of Columbia which, fittingly, was built on a swamp.  Thanks, low-info voters!  Happy Inaugural.

by Primo Encarnación – use freely

My beginning of the first day of the new, uh…urp, president’s term began appropriately – after a restless few hours of sleep, I was jolted out of bed at 3 am with a gigantic charley horse in my left leg.  Blissful sleep this night was not to be.  So, I dragged my weary self down the stairs, made my morning tea and opened my iPad.  JJJJEEEEEZZZZZZUUUUUSSSSS.  The first story is about how the FBI, the NSA, and the CIA are using intercepted communications to investigate Cheeto Jesus’s advisors’ ties to the Russians.  Several of CJ’s close advisors are under the microscope.

Then there’s the story about how CJ wanted tanks and missile launchers in the inaugural parade.  No, really, this idiot actually wanted a North Korean and Russian style parade.  Mercifully, the Pentagon said no, but caved on his demand for flyovers of aircraft from all the branches of the military.  This is the first time a flyover has been done since Harry Truman’s inaugural parade in 1949.

Then there’s the story that this transition was so poorly managed that dozens of Obama appointees were asked to stay until His Orangeness gets off Twitter long enough to hire the rest of his WH staff. Of the 660 staff he needs to appoint, he’s only filled 29 positions.

Then there’s the story about the Cheeto Interrussian Hotel that has already become an ethical minefield, and is now ground zero for those wishing favors from the new, uh…urp, president by holding huge events there, thus pouring more money into his pockets.

Then there’s the announcement by CJ that his 2020, uh…urp, reelection bid slogan is “Keep America Great”, which just so happens to be identical to the tag line of a horror movie from last year, The Purge, Election Year.  That’s right, dear customers, Cheeto Jesus just plagiarized his next campaign motto from a horror flick about election night.  You just can’t make up this stuff.

Then there’s the story about Reince Preibus ordering new staffers to not talk to CJ without his prior permission.  Oh, and to stay off social media.

BBBBBBBBBUUUUUUUAAAAAAHHHHAAAAA!  The irony just seeps out of this one.

This promises to be a dark day.  I’m seeing Ms. Jefe off this morning to raise hell in the Women’s March on Washington, then I’m going to start drinking.  After all, if you don’t start early, you can’t drink all day.