Last night while watching the GOP debate, I kept getting a feeling of deja vu.  Bubba told me it was deja poo.

But, I seriously had an odd feeling that I’d been there before.  Then it hit me.

Remember when you went to camp in the summer and you all sat around the campfire at night and told made-up scary stories while holding a flashlight under your chin, trying to scare the beejeebers out of everybody?

Ding!

That’s what last night was.

Well, that and some stuff meant solely to scare little children who need brain surgery.

And that whole Ted won’t shuddup episode.

Yeah, maybe Bubba was right.

It’s not a great picture, but look at Ted’s hand.

Is he becoming Napoleon?

Maybe he’s going to claim he loves America more because his hand is closer to his heart.

He’s weird.

You need to watch this.  You really do.

Okay, why didn’t that dog bite her?

She ate Milk Bones as a kid?  Well, that kinda explains why she whines so much.

Thanks to Brian for the heads up.

I have a friend who absolutely believes that Donald Trump’s run for president is a live reality teevee show.

I thought … nah, he’s spending money instead of making money.  He makes money on reality teevee.

But now I am starting to wonder …

Every week until Election Day 2016, Showtime will air a half-hour “real-time documentary” about what’s happening on the campaign trail.

The series, called “The Circus: Inside the Greatest Political Show on Earth,” comes from Mark Halperin and John Heilemann, the hosts of a daily political talk show on Bloomberg TV, and Mark McKinnon, a famed campaign strategist.

Oh my gosh, it’s now a reality show.  For real.  You gotta wonder if Donald Trump owns stock in Showtime.

Production is already underway: McKinnon was spotted with a camera crew at a Marco Rubio rally in Las Vegas on Monday.

My friend is acting all smug this morning.  “See?” he keeps saying.

But there’s more.  If you watch the series House of Cards about President Frank Underwood, murderer, philanderer, life destroyer, and political genius, life might be ready to imitate art.  This was also announced today.

When a handful of wannabe presidents square off at Tuesday night’s Republican debate, one faux president will make a “special announcement.”

A cryptic message from the official Twitter account of the “House of Cards” set the stage. “BREAKING NEWS: President Underwood will be making a special announcement during the #GOPDebate,” the tweet said.

So which Republican presidential candidate is really Frank Underwood. My bet is Ted Cruz.

Oh hell, my friend is right.  This whole damn thing is reality teevee.

Smug, my friend is acting smug.

Thanks to Bryan, who used to be my friend.

Out in California, a gun safety instructor shot one of his students.  Phillip Rushing, the instructor, shot his student, who also happens to be a popular local minister.

The Victim

“During the scenario, the instructor drew the firearm and it accidentally discharged,” she said. She did not know whether Rushing forgot he replaced the training gun or whether he knew he was drawing the real gun.

“When it fired and he realized what happened, he immediately dialed 911.”

The article notes that they have closed the school for the day after that.

The minister was shot in the stomach and underwent successful surgery.  They say he’s in plenty of pain but he will make a complete recovery.

Mack Breed, an assistant football coach at John Jay High School in San Antonio, did not like the officiating at one of the school’s games.

So he asked two players on the team to assault the ref right there on the football field.  They did.  The video is here.

So, as you could suspect, there is overwhelming colossal mild upsetness over this ref whipping event.

Former John Jay High School assistant coach Mack Breed pleaded guilty Monday to misdemeanor assault charges stemming from accusations that he instructed his players to tackle a referee during a game in September, ESPN reports.

Breed was sentenced to one year in jail with a $3,500 fine, but instead will be placed on probation for 18 months as defined in the terms of a plea deal.

Honey, I know people who littered and got a stiffer punishment than that.  That’s because you can mess with Texas but you cannot mess with Texas High School Football.

You know, there are certain people I would be willing to pay a $3,500 fine and 18 months probation to hit.  I would not, however, ask someone else to do it for me. Nor would I blindside anybody.

I want to tell you a story about my friend and one of the best politicians I ever knew, County Commissioner Ben Denham.  This was about twenty-five  years ago and Ben has since gone on to that great campaign in the sky.

Ben had a constituent by the name of Buck who was unhappy with him.  Buck continually came to Ben’s office and cussed out Ben’s secretary if Ben wasn’t there to cuss at.  Ben’s secretary was a prim and proper Sunday School teacher by the name of Miss Mattie.  Miss Mattie did not take kindly to cussin’.

One day Ben had enough and just happened to be there when Buck shows up and starts cussin’ Ben right there in front of Miss Mattie.  Ben told him to watch his mouth in front of Miss Mattie.  Miss Maddie also told him for the umpteenth to watch his mouth.

He refused to watch his mouth.  Holy cow, it just made him madder and he called Ben names that aren’t even in the dirty part of the dictionary.  It would have singed the ears off a sow.

Once more, Ben asked Buck to stop cussin’ in front of Miss Mattie.

Nope.  As Ben says, “I just did not know the magic words to make this guy stop.”

Ben told Buck, “This is the last time I’m gonna tell you this. You can talk all you want to but you cannot cuss with Miss Mattie sitting here.”

Buck replied, “Who’s gonna stop me?”

Ben hauled off and smacked that man right in the nose. Knocked him to the ground with Miss Mattie running around squealing, “Oh my, oh my. What have you done, Commissioner?”

Ben called the police, turned himself in, and then marched over the Justice of the Peace, his friend Ike, and paid the $200 fine for simple assault.  All in about 2 hours.

A lot of people who know Buck, me included, called Ben and offered to pay his fine for him.  He told me, “I did the crime.  I’ll pay the fine.”

Until his dying day, Ben told people that was the best $200 he ever spent.

I just thought you’d like that story.