Okay, if you’re ever in North Carolina and some guy tells you that he has homemade whiskey or a homemade firing range, leave.

Officials said three people were shooting at a homemade shooting range when one of them reached for his gun. The trigger, they said, caught something and the victim was shot in the chest.

The injured person was flown to a Charlotte hospital with serious injuries. His name was not released.

My trigger caught something is the polite way of saying, “I shot you.”

Y’all, Ben Carson isn’t real sure about them yankee fellas and has tried to move them to Canada.

His campaign tweeted a United States map with the states refusing Syrian refugees colored in red.  Ben said he “stands with” with Governors who are refusing refugees.

Then he re-arranged the states.

Yeah, he changed the map of the United States.

Does he know something we don’t know?  Or does he just know nothing at all?

If you live in Maine, you might want to make sure you still do.

Okay, so you’d think the Bush Boys would know that they do not have the necessary genes appropriate to conveying parables, metaphors, or, for that matter, speaking English proficiently.

But ya gotta give them an A for effort.

You know the metaphor where you put a frog in a pan of cold water and slowly turn up the heat?  And how the frog will not notice and allow itself to eventually boil?

Jeb! tried to explain the United States slipping into the horrific evil of something-or-other, and decided that a megaphone would be just grand.

Then, Mr. Bush went for the frog metaphor. And that’s where the problem for him began.

“It’s like the crabs in the, you know, whatever —the crabs in the boiling water,” Mr. Bush tried.

“Frogs,” an audience member shouted out, helpfully.

“The frogs,” Mr. Bush continued. “You think it’s warm, and it feels pretty good and then it feels like you’re in a whirlpool—you know, a Jacuzzi or something.”

He concluded with a morbid twist: “And then you’re dead. That’s how this works.”

Ya can’t get fooled again.

By the way, the horrific evil was free college tuition.

Thanks to Marge and Will for the heads up.

Tom DeLay lives in my neck of the woods and local Republicans still bow down to him when he walks by. I do not know why because he hasn’t had a job since he left Congress so he just goes from one Republican women’s club to the next trying to peddle his book, “No Retreat. No Surrender.” which is an odd title because retreating and surrendering is all he’s done his entire life.

So now he’s calling President Obama “a coward who has surrendered to Isis.”
He wants a “full scale war against Isis.”

Okay, so here’s this little short, chubby, balding man who has had more botox and facelifts than I can keep count of, and who has never served one day in the military, calling for war.  And calling other people “cowards.”

Yeah Tom, it takes a lot of courage to resign from congress instead of staying and fighting the innocence you claim you had.  It takes a lot of courage to walk away from your pest control business after stiffing your partner out of his life savings.  Oh, and the courage it took to refuse to testify at your own trial must have been mightily stressing on your grit meter.  How much courage did it take to close down the foster child care facility built with other people’s money and throw families out of their homes?

Silly Silly Tom, you even surrendered to Dancing with the Stars by whining about a nonexistent foot injury.

You have not earned the right to even talk about courage, you damn fool.

Okay, I have completely pissed off all my neighbors.  My work is done here.

Thanks to Kyle for the heads up.

Donald Trump is real, real, sorry to say this, but …

“Nobody wants to say this and nobody wants to shut down religious institutions or anything, but you know, you understand it. A lot of people understand it. We’re going to have no choice,” the Republican presidential said in an interview from Trump Tower on Fox News’ “Hannity” on Tuesday night.

So I guess I am wondering what other part of the First Amendment he wants to dissolve.

Let’s see, we can sell assault weapons to people on the terrorist list but we have to close mosques? Why? So they’ll use that time to join the NRA?

Are we sure Trump is an American?  Screw the birth certificate – I want a real test of citizenship.

Wanna get really pissed off?

Currently, some known or suspected terrorists are prohibited from boarding airplanes by the government’s no-fly list — but all are allowed to buy assault rifles and other weapons.

While the bill remained a nonstarter, more than 2,000 suspects on the FBI’s Terrorist Watchlist bought weapons in the U.S. over the last 11 years, according to the federal Government Accountability Office.

The GAO reported that 91% of all suspected terrorists who tried to buy guns in America walked away with the weapon they wanted over the time period, with just 190 rejected despite their ominous histories.

Read the whole thing.  And take a short dive into the comment section where you will see gun nuts argue that this is okay.

Thanks to Alfredo over at the Dairy Queen for the heads up.