Oh come on, Mike, what the hell is wrong with you?

Mike Huckabee (R) suggested that young Americans planning to join the military should wait until President Barack Obama leaves office to do so because his administration has an “open hostility toward the Christian faith,” the Huffington Post reports.

Numero Uno:  Mike doesn’t know diddle squat about the Christian faith.

Numero Two-o:  Onward Christian Soldiers ain’t the national anthem.

Numero Lasto:  You’d think that somebody – and yeah I’m talking to you, Mike – who gets to overrule God in determining someone else’s profession of faith could at least win the Republican nomination.  

I have a new rule.  Evangelicals have to quit calling themselves Christians.  They aren’t.

Y’all, Ted Cruz is nuts.

Texas Sen. Ted Cruz is arguing that the Second Amendment includes a right to revolt against government tyranny, a point of emphasis uncommon for mainstream presidential candidates.

Look, no matter how many damn guns you have, you will never have as many as the US Military.  Mainly because if you did, you wouldn’t have anywhere to put it.

No, that picture doesn’t look a thing like Elmer Fudd.  Not a thing.  Okay, so maybe a little.

The military budget for 2015 is $555 Billion.  Yeah, with a B.  If you gun guys had that much money, you’d have already bought a country of your own and had an episode of Preppers about you.

Ted, son, you ain’t overthrowing no governments.  You’re a big chicken.  Hell, even your Dad fled Cuba when the talk got tough.

You, son, are Elmer Fuddless.

Thanks to Deb for the heads up.

So poor little Donald Trump now has a SuperPAC.  Get a load of poor little underprivileged Donnie’s PAC.  (Click the little one to get the big one.)

Citizens for Restoring USA.  Well, la tee da.

Robert S. Kiger is just your average hard working American working stiff and that’s why his email address is —

Yep, that says exactly what you’d expect it to.  rkiger@equestriansfor trump.com

We don’t have equestrians in Texas.  We have cowboys.  But the closest we’d come to equestrians is sissies in funny pants.

I wonder if that superPAC is taken?

Thanks to Alfredo over at the Dairy Queen for the fun.

Just when you start thinking that something just has to be satire, it ain’t.

Y’all, we’ve been caught.  You have to turn in your liberal all-purpose protest sign.

On Tuesday’s edition of the Family Research Council’s “Washington Watch” program, Religious Right activist and rabbi Daniel Lapin repeated his bizarre claim that liberals are sexually attracted to radical Islam. Lapin told FRC President Tony Perkins that there is a “sexual dimension” to liberals’ supposed love for Islamic extremism, claiming “effeminate” liberals are sexually attracted to the “masculinity” of Islamic fundamentalism and are experiencing “Stockholm Syndrome.”

Well, there ya go.  They caught us.

Now I’m gonna figure out how I can prove that Rabbi Daniel Lapin is sexually attracted to Ted Cruz.  It’s just gotta be.

Okay, we’ve talked before about “unauthorized” PACs.  That’s where someone opens a superPAC, claims to be supporting a candidate or cause and rakes in the money.  This is living proof that Republicans knew what they were doing when they created superPACs – somebody makes money off somebody else’s work, keeps it anonymous and spends it however they want to.  That’s the Republican business model.

Sometimes it’s kinda hard to tell if a SuperPAC is real or a scam.  I’m betting scam on this one.  It’s based in San Antonio, Texas.

If you go look around at this site by clicking here, you’ll notice that nobody’s name is on it.  And, it looks grandpa built the site.  They do have a Facebook page.

However, at the FEC it’s listed as owned by Phillips W. Ireland.  He lives in Tennessee.  The assistant treasurer of the PAC says he lives in San Antonio.  He claims his name is Anthony Lee Gilley.  There is no Anthony Lee Gilley registered to vote anywhere in Texas.  You’d think someone that supportive of Ted Cruz would register to vote.  Or not.  Maybe not.

The good news is that this PAC does have a headquarters.  The bad news is that it’s at a post office.  I’m betting that it’s kinda small.  Or stuffed full of money.  Maybe.

I’m betting that both of these guys are geniuses.  My bet is that they are both Rand Paul supporters getting the Cruz supporters to waste money.

You know, we could do that, too.  Thelma needs an exploratory campaign cruise to the Bahamas.  I need a new campaign car and Verdelia needs a Republican headquarters/doublewide over at the trailer park.

You gotta love Republicans for coming up with this idea.

Thanks to Alfredo over at the Dairy Queen for finding the fun.

It’s that time in the legislatures across the country when things get official.

Done in dead solemn seriousness, official crap carries about the same level of debate as a declaration of war.

In Texas, one of our state representatives wants to name the cowboy hat as the official hat of Texas.

If the resolution passes, the cowboy hat will join a stupefyingly long list of other official state symbols – including the pecan tree (State Tree), the jalapeño (State Pepper), the Dutch Oven (State Cooking Implement), and Sideoats grama (State Grass).

Texas has two separate state shrubs (the crape myrtle and the Texas sage) and two separate state pastries (strudel and sopaipillas). There are three state mammals (the Longhorn, the Mexican free-tailed bat, and the armadillo) – and that’s not counting the official state dog breed (Blue Lacy) and horse (American quarter horse). There’s a state domino game (42), a state squash (pumpkin), and a state waterlily (Nymphaea Texas Dawn).

In Tennessee, though, things got heated when a legislator decided to introduce a bill making the Bible the state book of Tennessee.  I was shocked, shocked I tell you, that anybody in Tennessee could read.

Even the Republican Attorney General warned that this was a clear violation of separation of church and state.  But, nope, they wanna do it anyway.

“There are some things that are worth standing up for,” said Rep. Andy Holt, a Republican. “Markets, money and military are meaningless without morals. I think it’s time for our body to make a stand.”

But there was some naysayers.  Just not the kind you’d expect.

Several lawmakers raised concerns about putting the Bible on par with innocuous state symbols such as the official salamander, tree and beverage.

“Pilgrim’s Progress is a book, To Kill a Mockingbird is a book,” said Rep. Patsy Hazlewood, R-Signal Mountain. “The Bible is the word of God, it’s a whole a whole different level.”

Yeah, I guess being the official state book of Tennessee is kinda shameful.

Thanks to Auntie BFly for the heads up.